Precious Pearls

Idle Talk

2011-07-04T15:41:00.000-07:00

Praise be to Allaah The Almighty Who created man in a balanced form, inspired and adorned him with the beautifying light of faith, taught him eloquence and therewith, made him a pioneer and superior being, providing him with a tongue to articulate what is in his heart.

Truly, the tongue, from among the greatest blessings of Allaah The Almighty, is one of His most sophisticated and unique creations of all organs in the body. Although small in size, its impact is paramount. Faith and disbelief, which stem from obedience and disobedience, respectively, can not be known except through the testimony of this very organ.

Moreover, those who keep their tongues unchecked, fall prey to the devil’s influence, who will cause them to say evil things and lead them to an edge of a bank that is about to collapse, forcing them to fall down. Truly, no one escapes the evil of the tongue except who restricts it to the constraints of Sharee'ah, using it only to utter what is of benefit to him or her in this life and the Hereafter, while preventing it from uttering anything that may bring any harm, sooner or later.

That is why the Prophet, sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, said, as narrated by Mu'aath, may Allaah be pleased with him: “Could anything cast people in the Hellfire face down” – in another version, “on their noses” – “except the harvests of their tongues?” The phrase “harvests of their tongues” refers to the recompense and punishment for uttering what is prohibited. Each one of us plants good and evil acts with our words and actions; and then, we reap them on the Day of Resurrection. Whoever plants a good word or deed will harvest dignity, and whoever does the opposite only reaps regret. Thus, as the Hadeeth apparently indicates, the most common cause of people entering Hell is the sinful utterance of their tongues.

That includes Shirk (associating partners with Allaah), the gravest sin in the sight of Allaah The Almighty, as well as what is connected to it: ignorantly speaking of Allaah The Almighty. It also encompasses false testimony, doing magic, slander, and other major and minor sins like lying, backbiting and talebearing. In fact, all sinful deeds are mostly associated with utterances that support them.

That is why many Hadeeths refer to the virtue of silence. On one occasion, Sufyaan ibn ‘Abdullaah Ath-Thaqafi, may Allaah be pleased with him, asked: “O Messenger of Allaah, what is the most serious thing you fear for me?” The Prophet, sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, held his tongue and said,“This.” Similarly, another Companion, ‘Uqbah ibn ‘Aamir, may Allaah be pleased with him, says: “I said, ‘O Messenger of Allaah, how can I obtain salvation?’ The Prophet, sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, replied, ‘Control your tongue [from idle talk].’”

Under the chapter entitled Eemaan (faith) in Saheeh Al-Bukhaari, it is stated that the Prophet, sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, said: “A Muslim is the one who avoids harming other Muslims with his tongue and hand.”He, sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, also said:“Whoever believes in Allaah The Almighty and the Last Day should utter good words or remain silent.” Perhaps one of his more eloquent and concise sayings, this not only bears a command to say what is good, but provides the only alternative as keeping quiet. For, indeed, as Allaah The Almighty Says (what means): {Man does not utter any word except that with him is an observer prepared [to record].} [Quran 50:18]

In fact, the stakes are higher; Sahl ibn Sa‘d, may Allaah be pleased with him, narrates that the Prophet, sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, said: “He who guarantees for me what is between his jaws and what is between his thighs, I guarantee him Paradise.” This means that the one who uses his or her tongue only regarding relevant matters and restrains it from what does not concern him or her, and guards his or her private parts against illicit acts, is promised Paradise by the Prophet, sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam. Ibn Battaal, may Allaah have mercy upon him, said, “This Hadeeth indicates that the greatest trial for man in life is [the responsibility of] his tongue and private parts. Therefore, whoever is protected from their evil is protected from the gravest evil.”

Abu Hurayrah, may Allaah be pleased with him, related that the Prophet, sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, warned: “One might utter a word thinking it to be trivial and sinks [because of it] in Hell further than the distance of the east”; the wording reported by Muslim, may Allaah have mercy upon him, states: “farther than the distance between the east and west.” Ibn ‘Abdul-Barr, may Allaah have mercy upon him, said, that an example of such a word “is what a person utters before an unjust ruler [in order to please him].”

In another version of the Hadeeth, the Prophet, sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, mentioned that it may be “a word that he does not understand”, meaning he is unaware of whether it is good or bad, as explained by Shaykh Al-‘Izz ibn ‘Abdus-Salaam, who added, “Hence, it is prohibited for a Muslim to speak any [such] word.” Commenting on this Hadeeth, An-Nawawi, may Allaah have mercy upon him, said, “[It] encourages a man to watch his tongue. If a person wants to say something, he should think of, and fully grasp, what it is before he utters a word. If he finds that there is benefit in it, he should say it, otherwise, he should hold his tongue.”

‘Abdullaah Ibn Mas‘ood, may Allaah be pleased with him, would reportedly say: “By Allaah, nothing needs prolonged confinement more than my tongue.” He also used to say, “O my tongue, say good words and you will succeed, and speak no evil and you will be secure; otherwise, you will regret.” Another Companion, Abu Ad-Dardaa’, may Allaah be pleased with him, said, “Protect your ears from your mouth; indeed, you have two ears and one mouth, in order to hear more than you talk.”

Al-Hasan Al-Basri, may Allaah have mercy upon him, also said, “They used to say that the tongue of the believer is behind his heart; when he wants to say something, he contemplates it with his heart and then utters it. Whereas, the tongue of the hypocrite is in front of his heart; when he intends to say anything, he utters it before deliberating it in his heart.” He, may Allaah have mercy upon him, went a step further, saying, “He who does not watch his tongue does not understand his religion.”

If you ask why the virtue of silence is so great, it is because the tongue, with hardly any effort may lead to evil, lies, backbiting, talebearing, ostentation, hypocrisy, obscenity, dispute, self-praise, indulgence in falsehood, controversy, distortion, harming people and a violation of their privacy and honor. Moreover, it has a charm that affects the heart, and is motivated by a person’s temperament and is influenced by Satan. Those who indulge in idle talk can barely control their tongues so as to utter what they like and restrain it from what is not pleasing to them. It is one of the ambiguous facts that danger lies in idle talk, whereas safety, in silence, thus its enormous virtue.

Furthermore, keeping quiet strengthens a person’s zeal, maintains his or her gravity, helps him or her focus on meditation, remembrance of Allaah The Almighty and worship, and keeps him or her safe from the ill-effects of idle talk in the worldly life and its punishment in the Hereafter. Allaah The Almighty Says (what means): {Man does not utter any word except that with him is an observer prepared [to record].} [Quran 18:50]

Speech can be divided into four categories:

1- 1- Purely harmful – one should remain silent instead of indulging in such talk.

2- 2- That which includes both harm and benefit – such speech must also be avoided, because the elimination of evil takes precedence over the realization of benefit.

3- 3- That which has neither harm nor benefit – this is idle talk and keeping oneself busy with it is a waste of time, which, in itself, is nothing short of a great loss.

4- 4- Purely beneficial – after three-quarters of all categories of talk have been dismissed, it is only this that one must indulge in; however, a threat looms here, as well, since such talk may be subtly tainted with ostentation and self-praise, which is a grave risk.

The enduring bond of sisterhood

2011-06-24T18:04:00.000-07:00

The Prophet, sallallaahu alayhi wa sallam, said, “Whoever possesses the following three qualities will taste the sweetness of Eman (faith): One to whom Allaah and His Messenger become dearer than anything else, whoever loves his brother (or sister) solely for Allaah’s sake, and whoever hates to revert to disbelief just as he loathes to be thrown into the Fire.” [Al-Bukhaari and Muslim]
Although we readily understand the sweetness of Emaan (faith) that one experiences from loving Allaah and His Prophet, sallallaahu alayhi wa sallam, and hating to revert to disbelief, the concept of loving a sister in Islam is not often discussed in this manner. How could love of a sister in Islam be tied to the sweetness of Eman? And what is the sweetness of Eman?
In essence, love for the sake of Allaah is a thing that cannot be truly grasped until it is experienced. But some explanation may be beneficial.
Love for the Sake of Allaah
When a Muslim woman loves her sister ‘in Islam’ she loves her for the ‘sake of Allaah,’ subhanahu wa ta’ala—as noted in the hadeeth. This means that her love for her sister is connected to, and is part of her love for Allaah. She may love her and want to befriend her and be close to her for all the good reasons people love and befriend one another, but in addition, she loves her and treats her in the manner that Allaah has ordained she be treated in. Maintaining that as the basis for the relationship is what strips the love from worldly elements, and purifies it so that she and her friend know and feel their love extend way beyond this world.
In this way, a Muslim woman is certain that her love for her sister will endure, because they share a special bond that can never be broken, the bond of faith in Allaah, the Creator of all humankind, the Lord through whose Love people love, respect and be kind to one another. It is a bond between hearts and minds that brings them together in a
unique and special way; so much so that they are willing to sacrifice anything for each other knowing they will gain the pleasure of Allaah in the process. Nothing is ever done for worldly gain or purpose.
Status of those who love for the sake of Allaah
It is important to understand that loving someone solely for Allaah’s sake may not be easily found and nourished, but for those who do, the reward goes far beyond tasting the sweetness of Eman in this world to an unimaginable blessing—eternal enjoyment in Paradise. The Messenger of Allaah, sallallaahu alayhi wa sallam, said, “On the Day of Judgment, Allaah, subhanahu wa ta’ala, will announce, ‘Where are those persons who (in the world used to) love each other for the sake of My Pleasure? This day I am going to shelter them in the shade provided by Me. Today there is no shade except My shade.” (Muslim) Sisters who love each other for Allaah’s sake will find His shade on the day when there will be no other shade. The rewards that Allaah gives for this love are beyond what we are capable of earning through other deeds. This emphasizes the importance of loving each other for the sake of Allaah.
In another story, “A man went to visit a brother of his in another village. Allaah, subhanahu wa ta’ala, sent an angel to wait for him on the road. When the man came along, the angel asked him, ‘Where are you headed?’ He said, ‘I am going to visit a brother of mine who lives in this village.’ The angel asked, ‘Have you done him any favor (for which you are now seeking repayment)?’ He said, ‘No, I just love him for the sake of Allaah.’ The angel told him, ‘I am a messenger to you from Allaah, sent to tell you that He loves you as you love your brother for His sake.” (Muslim) How could we deny or ignore the significance of this, when we understand that our love for our sister in Islam brings to us the love of Allah? How could we treat our sister in any other way than that which would gain us Allah’s Pleasure and Grace? How could we harm our sister in Islam knowing that that will lead to losing all of these rewards and blessings?
The sweetness of Emaan
Have you tasted Eman? Do you know how it feels?
It is one of the most amazing gifts in this life, and how sweet it is. Loving your sister in Islam for the sake of Allah is one of the paths to tasting the sweetness of Eman. Experiencing this sweetness requires effort, self-sacrifice, and compassion.
The Prophet, sallallaahu alayhi wa sallam, said, “None of you has Eman until he desires for his brother Muslim that which he desires for himself.” [Al-Bukhaari and Muslim] He also said, “The Muslims in their mutual love, kindness, and compassion are like the human body, where when one of its parts is in agony, the entire body feels the pain, both in sleeplessness and fever.” [Al-Bukhaari and Muslim]
Feeling the pain should prompt us to action to alleviate the pain of our sisters in Islam. We should not sleep a night until our sisters are free from the pain and suffering that they are experiencing. When we start feeling the pain our sister feels, and not rest until we do something to alleviate it, then, and only then, we feel joy and happiness, no matter what hardships we had to overcome, we have tasted the sweetness of Eman.
This is one of the ways a sister can experience the sweetness of Eman, and this is the pinnacle of being a Mu’minah. Achieving that is an essential stage on the path to strengthening the Muslim Ummah.
The keys to being a true believing sister
Even though being a true believing sister in Islam is an achievable goal, it is not a simple matter, and there are many ways to fulfilling it. What is listed below outlines the things sisters should struggle to keep in their relationship so that it grows to be for the sake of Allah.
A true sister in Islam will honestly and sincerely love her sisters for the sake of Allah. This should not be construed to mean that sisters will not, and may not, have disagreements or problems. This is not possible, because we are human beings not angels. What makes our relationship unique is the fact that it is controlled by Allah’s commands and guidance. No matter what goes wrong, ultimately, we deal with one another according to the acceptable ways of Shari’ah, seeking only to please Him.
Thus, a sister will strive hard to maintain the ties of love and sisterhood. She will like for her sisters what she likes for herself, and will not forsake them or cut off relations. She will greet her sisters with a cheerful, smiling face, even (or especially) if she does not know them. Tolerance and forgiveness for mistakes will be an important part of her character, and she will be certain to cover the faults of her sisters. There will be no hatred, envy or malice, and she will not hurt feelings by being hostile or argumentative. The true sister will not backbite or gossip, and will stop others who engage in this harmful behavior. She will be kind and generous to her sisters and will offer them sincere and constructive advice when necessary. She will make every effort to enjoin them to the right and forbid them from wrong. She will be loyal toward her sisters and defend them in their absence.
It comes back to us
In the end it all comes hack to us. The Prophet, sallallaahu alayhi wa sallam, said, “One who helps a fellow Muslim in removing his difficulty in this world, Allah will remove the former’s distress on the Day of Judgment. He who helps to remove the hardship of another will have his difficulties removed by Allah in this world and the Hereafter. One who covers the shortcomings of another Muslim will have his faults covered up in this world and the next by Allah. Allah continues to help a servant so long as he goes on helping his own brother.” (Muslim)
The rewards that we gain are far beyond the efforts and sacrifices that we make.
Source: Islamweb.net

A Happy Home

2011-06-06T05:45:00.000-07:00

Allah The Almighty Says (what means): **{And Allah has made for you from your homes a place of rest.}[Quran 16:80]**
You have told the truth, O our Lord! The home is a place of rest, stability, comfort, reassurance, safety and tranquility, in which we live, and with which we protect ourselves from the heat of summer and the cold of winter. It is also our shelter in which we take refuge after the trouble and toil of the day.
If a little bird's nest is its shelter, place of rest and abode of reassurance, it would be more worthy for man to have his home an abode of happiness and a source of his pleasure. A home is not only walls, furniture and linen, but it is also a place of worship, an institute, and a place for cordiality and comfort. The spouses fill it with love and affection, and tranquility, calmness and stability shade it.
In the Muslim home, material and sensual rest is combined with spiritual and emotional rest; thereby the home is comprehensive and balanced. Also, Allah The Almighty has made the home a place of rest for the couple; He has made the husband a source of tranquility for his wife, and the wife a source of tranquility for her husband. Allah The Almighty Says (what means): {And of His signs is that He created for you from yourselves mates that you may find tranquility in them; and He placed between you affection and mercy. Indeed in that are signs for a people who give thought.} [Quran 30:21] Thus, marriage is a source of tranquility, and homes are places of rest – a favor from Allah The Almighty which should be appreciated, maintained and preserved.
Some of us might wonder: “Why a Muslim home? Is there a difference between a Muslim and a non-Muslim home?”
Undoubtedly, the Muslim home differs from any other. Its inhabitants carry in their chests a glorious belief which fills their hearts with the light of faith, and this light is reflected on all aspects of their life. A Muslim person should be (an example of the) Quran among people, the same as was the moral character of the Messenger of Allah, . For this reason, a Muslim home, with its corners, furniture, and the way it is arranged, should express the Islam of its owner.
The Muslim home might be a simple hut, or a graceful palace, and in either there is pleasure, gratitude, satisfaction and living in the shades of the Noble Quran and Sunnah. The family members are happy, not because they have great furniture or expensive fittings, but because happiness springs from their believing hearts and reassured souls. This is because they are pleased with Allah The Almighty as their Lord, Islam as their religion and Muhammad, , as their Prophet and Messenger.
The houses of the Prophet, , were a good pattern for an Islamic home. As small in size and modest in building as they might have been, they were full of happiness and satisfaction, and remained the highest ideal for the homes of the Companions and any of the Muslims who wished to lay the foundation of a home afterwards.
The houses of the Prophet, , were established on obedience and seeking the satisfaction of Allaah The Almighty, thereby representing the best example of the real Islamic home. Allaah The Almighty Says (what means): {Then is one who laid the foundation of his building on righteousness [with fear] from Allah and [seeking] His approval better or one who laid the foundation of his building on the edge of a bank about to collapse, so it collapsed with him into the fire of Hell? And Allah does not guide the wrongdoing people.} [Quran 9:109]
Although the houses of the Prophet, , were as humble, only enough as to satisfy his need, as simple as to cover (the minimum requirements of) his living, they were full of happiness, where their inhabitants were well-pleased with the fate and sustenance endowed to them by Allah The Almighty, and believing in the statement of the Prophet, : “He, upon whom morning comes while being safe and sound, healthy in his body, and having the sustenance of his day, seems as if the entire world has been granted for him.” [At-Tirmithi and Ibn Maajah]
The houses of the Prophet, , were based on worship and obedience to Allah The Almighty, where humbleness, simplicity and abstinence from the enjoyment of this worldly life seemed evident. All his houses surrounded the mosque. Some of them were built of palm reeds covered with mud, others of stones piled on top of each other, having their ceiling made of palm reeds.
The home of the Mother of Believers, ‘Aa‘ishah the dearest of his wives to hi
m after Khadeejah consisted of one chamber, built of bricks covered with mud, and another room annexed to it, made of palm reeds, covered with animal hair. Its door had a single wooden post, and its ceiling was low, like all the other houses of the Prophet, . It had simple furniture: a bed of pieces of wood tied with fiber ropes, having a cushion of leather stuffed with fiber; a water-skin; and clay vessels for his food and ablution.
Simplicity and contentment also seemed evident in the homes of the Companions of the Messenger of Alla-ah, . The furniture of Faatimah the daughter of the Prophet, , with which she was wed to ‘Ali Ibn Abi Taalib consisted of a mantle of velvet, a cushion of leather stuffed with fiber, a millstone, a water-skin and two jars. That was the furniture of the leader of the women of Paradise, and the daughter of the master of all the prophets, may Allah exalt their mention. This shows how the houses of the Prophet, , and of his Companions were a good model for the Islamic home.
If such was the state of the houses of the Prophet, , and his Companions this does not mean that Islam impedes one from being blessed in a graceful spacious home; on the contrary, according to Islam, that is a sustenance, favor and grace bestowed by Allah The Almighty upon whomever He pleases. Allah The Almighty Says (what means): **{Say, “Who has forbidden the adornment of Allah which He has produced for His servants and the good [lawful] things of provision?”} [Quran 7:32] The Messenger of Allah, , said: “Four things bring about happiness: a righteous woman (i.e., wife), a spacious residence, a good neighbor, and a comfortable means of transport.” [Al-Haakim] Man then has to utilize this pleasure in all that is good, for he would be held accountable about it on the Day of Judgment as confirmed by Allah The Almighty in the verse (which means): {Then you will surely be asked that Day about pleasure.} [Quran 102:8]
Like other human beings, the Muslim family inclines to possess the best, the most spacious, the prettiest, and the richest of homes. Allah The Almighty Says (what means): {Beautified for people is the love of that which they desire - of women and sons, heaped-up sums of gold and silver, fine branded horses, and cattle and tilled land. That is the enjoyment of worldly life, but Allah has with Him the best return.} [Quran 3:14]
The Muslim family knows well that real happiness is to make the home, whether it is small or large, a garden full of faith, satisfied with contentment, shaded with tranquility and reassurance; and to have its members adopt high morals and upright conduct. It perceives that in whichever state it might be, it is living in a favor bestowed by Allah The Almighty for which gratitude is due. Gratitude for a favor develops, purifies and proliferates it as confirmed by Allah; Allah The Almighty (what means): {If you are grateful, I will surely increase you [in favor].} [Quran 14:7]
The Muslim family neither boasts nor shows pride over others because of the favors of Allah The Almighty bestowed upon it. It always shows the bounty and favor conferred by Allaah The Almighty upon it in response to His statement (which means): {But as for the favor of your Lord, report [it].} [Quran 93:11] And, acting upon the statement of the Messenger of Allah, : *“Indeed, Allah likes to see the signs of His favor on His slave.”*** [At-Tirmithi and Al-Haakim]
But, at the same time, the Muslim family should not engage in worldly pleasures and neglect obedience to Allah The Almighty, nor be mainly concerned with their house in this worldly life, which diverts them from working for their house in Paradise, Allah willing. To this meaning a poet refers, by saying that one shall have no abode to reside in after death other than the one he built before his death. If he built it well, his residence (in the Hereafter) would be good; and if he built it with evil, he would fail.
Once, ‘Ali Ibn Abi Taalib passed by a man who was building a house, thereupon he said to him, “You were dead before you came to life, and in a short while you will be dead [yet again]. You are building a house for the perishing abode [i.e. this worldly life], so build a house for the eternal abode [i.e. the Hereafter as well].”
Blessed be the Muslim family if it is to have the world in its hand and not in its heart; and blessed be it if it is to utilize all things surrounding it correctly in such a way as to help it obey Allaah The Almighty, acting upon the following wisdom, “Work for your worldly life as if you would live forever, and work for your Hereafter as if you would die tomorrow.” [Ibn Al-Mubaarak in Az-Zuhd]
To talk about the Muslim home, its components and furniture, does not mean that all those specifications should be comprised in every home. But, it is an ideal we ask Allah The Almighty to give to every Muslim on the face of the earth.
The main point lies not in the walls and furniture of the house so much as it lies in its inhabitants. Hence, every family member could bring about happiness and satisfaction to his household with the smallest thing available to him. The faithful believer is intelligent and prudent, as the Messenger of Allah, , said: “The sagacious one is he who holds himself accountable [for his deeds], and works for [the life] after death; and the incompetent is he who subjugates his self to its fancies and has hopeful expectations from Allah.”[Ahmad, At-Tirmithi and Ibn Maajah]

Islamweb.net

Hijabed like Me: A Non-Muslim Woman Experiments with Hijab

2010-07-25T14:53:00.000-07:00

I walked down the street in my long white dress and inch-long, black hair one after-noon, and truck drivers whistled and shouted obscenities at me. I felt defeated. I had just stepped out of a hair salon. I had cut my hair short, telling the hairdresser to trim it as she would a guy's. I sat numbly as my hairdresser skillfully sheared into my shoulder-length hair with her scissors, asking me with every inch she cut off if I was freaking out yet. I wasn't freaking out, but I felt self-mutilated.

I was obliterating my femininity:

It wasn't just another haircut. It meant so much more. I was trying to appear andro-gynous by cutting my hair. I wanted to obliterate my femininity. Yet that did not prevent some men from treating me as a sex object. I was mistaken. It was not my femininity that was problematic, but my sexuality, or rather the sexuality that some men had ascribed to me based on my biological sex. They reacted to me as they saw me and not as I truly am. Why should it even matter how they see me, as long as I know who I am? But it does. I believe that men who see women as only sexual beings often commit violence against them, such as rape and battery. Sexual abuse and assault are not only my fears, but my reality.

I was molested and raped. My experiences with men who violated me have made me angry and frustrated. How do I stop the violence? How do I prevent men from seeing me as an object rather than a female? How do I stop them from equating the two? How do I pro-ceed with life after experiencing what others only dread? The experiences have left me with questions about my identity. Am I just another Chinese-American female? I used to think that I have to arrive at a conclusion about who I am, but now I realize that my identity is constantly evolving.

My experience of being “hijabed”:

One experience that was particularly educational was when I “dressed up” as a Mus-lim woman for a drive along Crenshaw Boulevard with three Muslim men as part of a newsmagazine project. I wore a white, long-sleeved cotton shirt, jeans, tennis shoes, and a flowery silk scarf that covered my head, which I borrowed from a Muslim woman. [1] Not only did I look the part, I believed I felt the part. Of course, I wouldn't really know what it feels like to be hijabed. I coined this word for the lack of a better term everyday, because I was not raised with Islamic teachings. However, people perceived me as a Muslim woman and did not treat me as a sexual being by making cruel remarks. I noticed that men's eyes did not glide over my body as has happened when I wasn't hijabed. I was fully clothed, exposing only my face.

I remembered walking into an Islamic center and an African-American gentleman in-side addressed me as “sister,” and asked where I came from. I told him I was originally from China. That didn't seem to matter. There was a sense of closeness between us because he assumed I was Muslim. I didn't know how to break the news to him because I wasn't sure if I was or not. I walked into the store that sold African jewelry and furniture and another gen-tleman asked me as I was walking out if I was Muslim. I looked at him and smiled, not know-ing how to respond. I chose not to answer.

Being hijabed changed others' perception of me:

Outside the store, I asked one of the Muslim men I was with, “Am I Muslim?” He ex-plained that everything that breathes and submits is. I have concluded that I may be and just don't know it. I haven't labeled myself as such yet. I don't know enough about Islam to assert that I am Muslim.

Though I don't pray five times a day, go to a mosque, fast, nor cover my head with a scarf daily, this does not mean that I am not Muslim.[2] These seem to be the natural manifestations of what is within. How I am inside does not directly change whether I am hijabed or not. It is others' perception of me that was changed. Repeated experiences with others in turn create a self-image.

Hijab as oppression: a superficial and misguided view:

I consciously chose to be hijabed because I was searching for respect from men.[3] In-itially, as both Women's Studies major and a thinking female, I bought into the Western view that the wearing of a scarf is oppressive. After this experience and much reflection, I have arrived at the conclusion that such a view is superficial and misguided.

The most liberating experience of my life:

I covered up that day out of choice, and it was the most liberating experience of my life. I now see alternatives to being a woman. I discovered that the way I dress dictated others' reaction towards me. It saddens me that this is a reality. It is a reality that I have accepted, and chose to conquer rather than be conquered by it. It was my sexuality that I covered, not my femininity. The covering of the former allowed the liberation of the latter.

(This article was originally published in Al-Talib, the newsmagazine of the Muslim Stu-dents' Association of the University of California in Los Angeles (UCLA) in October 1994. At the time of its publication, Kathy Chin was a senior at UCLA majoring in Psychobiology and Women's Studies. )

Footnotes:

1. This does not mean that it is the Islamic hijab.

2. To be a Muslim, you must testify that “There is no god but Allah and that Muhammad is the Messenger of Allah.” (Reviewer)

3. If you choose to be a Muslim, it should be because you want the right way of Allah regardless any other intention. (Reviewer)

Witten by: Kathy Chin
Reviewer: Abu Adham Osama Omara (Islamhouse.com)

Women Wearing High Heels?

2010-06-18T23:08:00.000-07:00

What is the ruling on women wearing high heels?

Praise be to Allaah.

Wearing high heels is not permissible because it exposes women to the risk of falling, and we are commanded in sharee’ah to avoid danger in a general sense, as Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):

“And do not kill yourselves”
[al-Nisa’ 4:29]

“and do not throw yourselves into destruction”
[al-Baqarah 2:195]

It also makes women look taller than they really are and makes their posteriors appear more prominent, and this is a kind of deception and showing the adornments which the believing woman is forbidden to show, as Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):
“and not to show off their adornment except only that which is apparent (like both eyes for necessity to see the way, or outer palms of hands or one eye or dress like veil, gloves, headcover, apron), and to draw their veils all over Juyoobihinna (i.e. their bodies, faces, necks and bosoms) and not to reveal their adornment except to their husbands, or their fathers, or their husband’s fathers, or their sons, or their husband’s sons, or their brothers or their brother’s sons, or their sister’s sons, or their (Muslim) women (i.e. their sisters in Islam)” [al-Noor 24:31]
From Fataawa al-Lajnah al-Daa’imah, Majallat al-Buhooth, 9/46.

Moreover, it also makes a woman lean forward (maa’ilah ila al-amaam), so there is the fear that the warning issued to those women who walk with an enticing gait (al-maa’ilaat al-mumilaat) may apply to her too [in the hadeeth which says that such women will never even smell the fragrance of Paradise from afar]. It also harms the back, as has been proven medically. The heels also make a sound which attracts the attention of men and is a temptation to them. We ask Allaah to keep us all safe and sound.

Sheikh Muhammed Salih Al-Munajjid
http://www.islamqa.com/

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Five Risks of Wearing High Heels Revealed

Over the years, high heeled shoes continue to be a popular fashion trend. So popular, it is causing some women to surgically alter their feet in order to fit into them. Even without this, there are health risks associated with wearing high heels.

1. A high heeled shoe forces the posture into an unnatural position that significantly stresses the joints. The spine, which in flat shoes is reasonably straight, forms more of an 'S' shape with the chest and lower back pushing forward and the hips pushed back. The height of the heel also changes the amount of weight on the forefoot. A 1-inch heel will increase the pressure by 22%; a 2-inch heel by 57%; and a 3-inch heel by 76%. This increased pressure puts the forefoot at risk for injuries such as stress fractures, bunions, and hammertoes.

2. Knee pain is common when high heels are involved. The heel height causes increased strain on the knee joint and associated tendons. The quadriceps muscle group in the front of the thigh works harder, increasing pressure on the kneecap by up to 26%. This can ultimately increase the incidence of osteoarthritis of the knee and quadriceps tendinitis.

3. When the heel is constantly elevated, the calf muscle and Achilles tendon can contract and shorten. Wearing high heels habitually can result in a woman no longer able to tolerate a flat shoe. On occasion, this can even require surgery to lengthen the Achilles tendon. Most often, however, this will increase the chances of Achilles tendinitis or shin splints.

4. The changes in posture and overall imbalance will lead to instability when walking and a resulting risk of ankle sprains. High heels, especially stilettos, will lead to instability and a major increase in ankle sprains result. An ankle sprain is caused from the twisting of the ankle and results in a tear of the ligaments that connect the foot and leg bones and stabilize the ankle. When the heel is balancing on a narrow stiletto heel, if the heel shifts outward slightly a sudden twist may occur to sprain these ligaments. Swelling, bruising and pain will result. At worst, it is possible for the ankle to fracture, a ligament can pull a piece of bone off, or even a bone in the foot can break due to the pull of a tendon.

5. High heels are enjoyed by most women because they are "cute." They are narrow and are contoured to make the foot look slender. The tight fit of many heels will force the toes to conform to its shape. The added pressure on the toes can exacerbate bunions and hammertoes. The pressure of the shoe itself can cause corns to form. Furthermore. The compression of the metatarsal bones can cause pressure on the nerves that run between them. A Morton's neuroma, which is a growth and inflammation of the nerve, can form due to the pressure. Remember, a shoe is meant to fit the foot, not squeeze it relentlessly.

By Dr. Andrew Schneider
(Dr. Andrew Schneider is a podiatrist in Houston)

High heels dangerous to your health

The idea that high heels can be hazardous to your health isn't new—orthopedists have warned women for years that high heels can contribute to the development of a variety of conditions from corns and calluses to hammertoes, arthritis, chronic knee pain, sprained ankles and back problems.
Researchers link high heels and knee osteoarthritis, a painful, degenerative joint disease.

In 1998, a team of Harvard researchers linked high heels and knee osteoarthritis, a painful, degenerative joint disease characterized by the breakdown of the cartilage surrounding the knee. In that study, D. Casey Kerrigan, MD, associate professor of physical medicine at Harvard Medical School, and her team looked at very narrow, stiletto heels.

Wide heels no better

The researchers decided to look at the chunkier heels now in fashion to determine if they too are harmful to women's knees. The latest study, which appears in the April 7, 2001, issue of The Lancet, demonstrates that wide heels increase the risk of developing osteoarthritis in the knee as much as, or more than, spindly-heeled stilettos.

"Wide-heeled shoes give you the perception of more stability when you're standing, and they feel comfortable, so women wear them all day long," Kerrigan said. "They are better for your feet than stiletto heels, but just as bad for your knees."

Study measures knee torque

The study subjects were 20 healthy women with an average age of 34 and an average weight of 130 pounds. Each woman received one pair of shoes with a heel approximately 1.75 inches wide and another pair of shoes with a heel width of about half an inch. Both pairs were 2.7 inches high.
Study participants were then asked to walk 10 meters or about 32 feet, once in narrow-heeled shoes, once in wide-heeled shoes and once barefoot. Researchers measured knee torque, how much the knee twisted during each walk.
Low-heeled shoes or no heels are a woman's safest bet against osteoarthritic knees.

Both types of shoes increased knee joint pressure—26 percent more for wide-heeled shoes and 22 percent for narrow-heeled shoes. This kind of repetitive stress to the knee elevates the risk for osteoarthritis, according to physicians. Low-heeled shoes or no heels, researchers conclude, are a woman's safest bet against osteoarthritic knees.
"It takes a long time to feel the effects of knee osteoarthritis, and once you do, it's too late," said Dr. Kerrigan.
Eighty percent of the 42 million Americans suffering from arthritis have osteoarthritis, in which joint cartilage and surrounding bone progressively degrade from wear and tear. Surgeons perform 300,000 artificial knee replacements in this country every year due to this condition.

By Dr Enzo J. Sella
(Dr. Sella is an attending orthopedic surgeon at Yale-New Haven Hospital )
http://www.ynhh.org/

A Woman on a Mission.

2010-06-11T22:05:00.000-07:00

My Journey to Islam.

Aisha Bhutta, also known as Debbie Rogers, is serene. She sits on the sofa in big front room of her tenement flat in Cowcaddens, Glasgow. The walls are hung with quotations from the Koran, a special clock to remind the family of prayer times and posters of the Holy City of Mecca. Aisha's piercing blue eyes sparkle with evangelical zeal, she smiles with a radiance only true believers possess. Her face is that of a strong Scots lass - no nonsense, good-humoured - but it is carefully covered with a hijab.

For a good Christian girl to convert to Islam and marry a Muslim is extraordinary enough. But more than that, she has also converted her parents, most of the rest of her family and at least 30 friends and neighbours.

Her family were austere Christians with whom Rogers regularly attended Salvation Army meetings. When all the other teenagers in Britain were kissing their George Michael posters goodnight, Rogers had pictures of Jesus up on her wall. And yet she found that Christianity was not enough; there were too many unanswered questions and she felt dissatisfied with the lack of disciplined structure for her beliefs. "There had to be more for me to obey than just doing prayers when I felt like it."

Aisha had first seen her future husband, Mohammad Bhutta, when she was 10 and regular customer at the shop, run by his family. She would see him in the back, praying. "There was contentment and peace in what he was doing. He said he was a Muslim. I said: What's a Muslim?".

Later with his help she began looking deeper into Islam. By the age of 17, she had read the entire Koran in Arabic. "Everything I read", she says, "was making sense."

She made the decision to convert at16. "When I said the words, it was like a big burden I had been carrying on my shoulders had been thrown off. I felt like a new-born baby."

Despite her conversion however, Mohammed's parents were against their marrying. They saw her as a Western woman who would lead their eldest son astray and give the family a bad name; she was, Mohammed's father believed, "the biggest enemy."

Nevertheless, the couple married in the local mosque. Aisha wore a dress hand-sewn by Mohammed's mother and sisters who sneaked into the ceremony against the wishes of his father who refused to attend.

It was his elderly grandmother who paved the way for a bond between the women. She arrived from Pakistan where mixed-race marriages were even more taboo, and insisted on meeting Aisha. She was so impressed by the fact that she had learned the Koran and Punjabi that she convinced the others; slowly, Aisha, now 32, became one of the family.

Aisha's parents, Michael and Marjory Rogers, though did attend the wedding, were more concerned with the clothes their daughter was now wearing (the traditional shalwaar kameez) and what the neighbours would think. Six years later, Aisha embarked on a mission to convert them and the rest of her family, bar her sister ("I'm still working on her). "My husband and I worked on my mum and dad, telling them about Islam and they saw the changes in me, like I stopped answering back!"

Her mother soon followed in her footsteps. Marjory Rogers changed her name to Sumayyah and became a devout Muslim. "She wore the hijab and did her prayers on time and nothing ever mattered to her except her connections with God."

Aisha's father proved a more difficult recruit, so she enlisted the help of her newly converted mother (who has since died of cancer). "My mumand I used to talk to my father about Islam and we were sitting in the sofa in the kitchen one day and he said: "What are the words you say when you become a Muslim?" "Me and my mum just jumped on top of him." Three years later, Aisha's brother converted "over the telephone - thanks to BT", then his wife and children followed, followed by her sister's son.
It didn't stop there. Her family converted, Aisha turned her attention to Cowcaddens, with its tightly packed rows of crumbling, gray tenement flats. Every Monday for the past 13 years, Aisha has held classes in
Islam for Scottish women. So far she has helped to convert over 30. The women come from a bewildering array of backgrounds. Trudy, a lecturer at the University of Glasgow and a former Catholic, attended Aisha's classes purely because she was commissioned to carry out some research. But after six months of classes she converted, deciding that Christianity was riddled with "logical inconsistencies". "I could tell she was beginning to be affected by the talks", Aisha says. How could she tell? "I don't know, it was just a feeling."

The classes include Muslim girls tempted by Western ideals and need in salvation, practicing Muslim women who want an open forum for discussion denied them at the local male-dominated mosque, and those simply interested in Islam. Aisha welcomes questions. "We cannot expect people blindly to believe."

Her husband, Mohammad Bhutta, now 41, does not seem so driven to convert Scottish lads to Muslim brothers. He occasionally helps out in the family restaurant, but his main aim in life is to ensure the couple's five children grow up as Muslims. The eldest, Safia, "nearly 14, Al-Humdlillaah (Praise be to God!)", is not averse to a spot of recruiting herself. One day she met a woman in the street and carried her shopping, the woman attended Aisha's classes and is now a Muslim.
"I can honestly say I have never regretted it", Aisha says of her conversion to Islam. "Every marriage has its ups and downs and sometimes you need something to pull you out of any hardship. But the Prophet Peace by upon him, said: 'Every hardship has an ease.' So when you're going through a difficult stage, you work for that ease to come."
Mohammed is more romantic: "I feel we have known each other for centuries and must never part from one another. According to Islam, you are not just partners for life, you can be partners in heaven as well, for ever. Its a beautiful thing, you know."

From: The Guardian Newspaper, England
(islamweb.net)

The Promise of Allah.

2010-05-23T14:57:00.000-07:00

After burying three babies, Umm Nuha reflects on the power of Allah (SWT)’s promise of ease after difficulty.

I tear up as I lie in bed nursing my almost-2-yearold little girl. Her warm hands stroke my tummy while my arms blanket her as she drifts off to sleep. I knew that weaning her would be difficult for me and now, I find myself turning to Allah, asking Him for the strength to get us both through this weaning process.
I imagine that many mothers feel this way about weaning. Many of them have told me that when the time came, they just knew that it was time. That they got to a point when they felt that it was enough. I haven’t reached that point. And I don’t think that I ever will. I have been thinking about this day since the first time that I fed her.

As her body relaxes into a deep sleep, I am reminded of my other children. Three of them, who all grew inside me by the permission of Allah, and all three who, by His decree, have returned to Him. And again, I cry. I think of the longing that I had to nourish them with the breastmilk that my body had produced for each one them. The milk that was forced to dry up because my children were stillborn. And yet, I do not wish that things were any different to what they are today. How can I argue with my Lord, whose love for me is greater than my love for my own children?

When I began my journey into motherhood, I had no idea that it would take this course. I had read so many books about pregnancy, but no-one wants a pregnant woman to read about stillbirth, let alone think about it, so it wasn’t even on my radar. The very word itself - stillbirth - is one that people find difficult to say. No-one expects this to happen to them. Especially when they are young and healthy. Perhaps, I was one of those women who thought that it would never happen to me.

I really wish that I had read an article titled ‘What to expect when what you were expecting does not happen’. And I wish that everyone I know had read it too. I want everyone to know that I carried my babies for many months. That I felt them kick inside me, that I talked to them, dreamed of them, and longed for them. I want people to know that they were alive at one point - that Allah had given to each of them a ruh (soul), and then He (SWT) I took their ruh back to Him. I want people to know that I gave birth to them, and my husband and I held them, and named them. We held our children’s lifeless bodies in our arms and said hello and goodbye all at the same time. And then, my husband had to bury them. The grief was overwhelming and suffocating. I couldn’t see how I would surmount it at the time.

I read the following hadith: The Messenger of Allah (SAW) said, “When a man’s child dies, Allah, the Exalted, asks His angels, `Have you taken out the life of the child of My slave?’ and they reply in the affirmative. He (SWT) then asks, `Have you taken the fruit of his heart?’ and they reply in the affirmative. Thereupon He asks, `What did my slave say?’ They say: `He praised You and said: Inna lillahi wa inna ilaihi raji’un (We belong to Allah and to Him we shall return).’ Allah says: `Build a house for my slave in Jannah and name it Baytul- Hamd (the House of Praise).’ Reported by Abu Musa Al-Ash`ari (May Allah be pleased with him).

As I tried to fight my way through the fog that hung over my every thought, I slowly came to realize that I was now part of this special club of bereaved parents who were all hoping to get their reward in the Aakhirah. I often recited Surah Al Inshiraah (The Solace) during all of my pregnancies. I clung to the verses for hope: ‘Verily after hardship comes Ease. Verily after Hardship comes Ease’. It is a certainty. Such a certainty that Allah (SWT) says it twice. Each of my children brought their own barakah with them. My husband and I were closer to each other and to Allah as we journeyed through this together.
About 4 years after I gasped for breath during the silent labour of my firstborn, I was back in labour, but this time, living the promise of Allah. As I heard my fourth child take her first breath, I knew without reservation that Allah’s promise was true. Her name is Yusra. It couldn’t have been anything else really.

My daughter is now the ease in my moments of grief. I am a very different parent to her than what I would have been had I not had her siblings. I try to be more patient, I try not to take a single second for granted. I often find that I am misunderstood by people who label me as an overprotective mother. But the truth is, I am trying to fit the love of 4 children into just one of them, and I am already running out of time. I don’t do it because I feel that I have to. I want to savour every single second. I feed off it. It nourishes me. It makes me feel...like I can breathe. I don’t want my daughter to grow up in the shadow of my grief, but I do want to her know that she is living proof that Allah (SWT) does indeed listen to prayers, and that He answers them.

Time and grief both clarify many things for you. For me, I have to come to realise who my closest friends are - those who never tire of hearing my story. After parenting Yusra, I can only now imagine the pain that my parents felt at having to watch their daughter go through what I did. But more than anything, what has become clearer than anything else, is that I know that Allah made a promise to me, and He fulfilled it in more ways than I can ever count. And for that, I can never be sufficiently thankful. For that, I will wake up every 2 hours at night to feed my daughter. I will nurse her for the full term that Allah mentions in the Qur’an. I will give thanks for every smile and I will capture it in my mind forever. For every cuddle that I give to her, I will then give her 3 more for each of her siblings. And I will pray to Allah to make them preparers for us for Jannah, and good rewards, and stored treasures, and interceders, and those whose intercessions are accepted.

Meaning of the lack in reason and religious commitment in women.

2010-04-26T22:48:00.000-07:00

The Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “I have not seen any lacking in reason and religious commitment but (at the same time) more able to rob the wisdom of the wise, except one of you [women].” They said: How are we lacking in religious commitment and reason, O Messenger of Allaah? He said: “Is not the testimony of a woman like half the testimony of a man?” They said: Yes. He said: “That is how she is lacking in reason.
And when she menstruates, does she not refrain from praying and fasting?” They said: Yes. He said: “That is how she is lacking in religious commitment.” So the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) explained that her lacking in reason refers to her weak memory, and that her testimony must be supported by the testimony of another woman, in order to confirm the testimony, because she may forget, and add something to or take something away from her testimony, as Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):

“And get two witnesses out of your own men. And if there are not two men (available), then a man and two women, such as you agree for witnesses, so that if one of them (two women) errs, the other can remind her”

[al-Baqarah 2:282].

With regard to her lacking in religious commitment, that is because when she is menstruating or bleeding following childbirth, she does not pray or fast, and she does not make up the missed prayers, so this is lacking in religious commitment. But this lacking is not something for which she is called to account or blamed, rather it is something that happens by the will of Allaah; for He is the One Who has prescribed that out of kindness towards her and so as to make things easier for her, because if she were to fast during menses and nifaas, that would harm her. By His mercy Allaah has prescribed that she should not fast at the time of menses and nifaas, and she should make it up after that.

With regard to prayer, at the time of menses she is unable to purify herself, so by His mercy Allaah has prescribed that she should not pray, and the same applies to nifaas, and He has not prescribed that she should make it up, because making it up would be very difficult, as prayers are offered five times a day, and menses may last for several days, seven or eight or more, and nifaas may last as long as forty days. So by His mercy and kindness towards her, Allaah has waived the duty of offering and making up prayers.

This does not mean that her reason is lacking entirely, or that her religious commitment is lacking entirely, rather the Messenger (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) explained that the lack in her reasoning has to do with what may happen of her testimony not being accurate, and the lack in her religious commitment has to do with what may happen of her missing prayers and fasts at the time of menses and nifaas. But that does not imply that she is less than a man in everything, or that a man is better than her in everything.

Yes, the male gender is superior to the female gender in general, for many reasons, as Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):

“Men are the protectors and maintainers of women, because Allaah has made one of them to excel the other, and because they spend (to support them) from their means”

[al-Nisa’ 4:34].

But a woman may sometimes surpass a man in many things. How often has a woman surpassed men in her reason, religious commitment and memory. What is narrated from the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) with regard to the female gender being inferior to the male gender in reason and religious commitment is from this point of view, which the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) explained.

A woman may do a great deal of righteous deeds and thus surpass many men in her righteous deeds, fear of Allaah and status in the Hereafter. She may have a great deal of interest in some matters and thus able to give proper testimony, better than that of some men in some issues in which she has an interest. She may strive in memorization and understanding these issues, thus becoming a reference point with regard to Islamic history and many other things. This is clear to anyone who studies the state of women at the time of the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) and after that.

Thus it is clear that this lack does not mean that women cannot be relied on in narration (of hadeeth etc) or in giving testimony, if it is supported by another woman. It also does not mean that she does not fear Allaah or that she cannot be among the best of Allaah’s slave and the best of the female slaves of Allaah, if she adheres strictly to Islam. Although fasting is waived for her at the time of menses and nifaas, she has to make it up, and even prayer is waived in her case, but she does not have to make it up. This does not imply that she is lacking in all things when it comes to fearing Allaah, obeying His commands and becoming well-versed in matters that are of interest to her. It is a lack that is specific to reason and religious commitment, in the way that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) explained. So the believer should not accuse her of being lacking in all things, or of being weak in religious commitment in all aspects, rather it is a specific type of lacking that has to do with her religious commitment and reason, which has to do with accuracy of testimony and so on. So she should be treated fairly and the words of the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) should be interpreted in the best possible manner. And Allaah knows best.

Shaykh ‘Abd al-‘Azeez ibn Baaz (may Allaah have mercy on him)
Majallat al-Buhooth al-Islamiyyah (29/100-102).

www.islamqa.com

The empowerment of women, but at what price?

2010-04-09T22:52:00.000-07:00

It is odd for a Muslim to see the workings of humans against their very own nature. The most evident example of this is demonstrated in the ongoing world movement to “Empower Women." The movement has been gaining momentum and is being endorsed and promoted by various international organizations, particularly the United Nations. Both the United Nations Human Development Report (2002) and the Arab Human Development Report (2002) include goals for "the complete empowerment of women." The Human Development Report even has a gender empowerment measure (GEM) that assesses gender inequality in economic and political opportunities.

The Convention on the Elimination of All Forms of Discrimination against Women from the Office of the High Commissioner of Human Rights of the United Nations is the most blatant example of the efforts to alter the unique status of the genders.

One of the main objectives of this committee is the following: "Aware that a change in the traditional role of men as well as the role of women in society and in the family is needed to achieve full equality between men and women... States Parties shall take all appropriate measures: to modify the social and cultural patterns of conduct of men and women, with a view of achieving the elimination of prejudices and customary and all other practices which are based on the idea of the inferiority or the superiority of either of the sexes or on stereotyped roles for men and women."

As is evident in the statement, this committee outwardly takes aim at religion and culture, expressing the view that "cultural and religious values cannot be allowed to undermine the universality of women's rights." They have said, that "in all countries, (one of) the most significant factors inhibiting women's ability to participate in public life have been the cultural framework of values and religious beliefs."

The Committee, in fact, has gone so far as to instruct Muslim nations that they must reinterpret the Noble Quran in ways that will better comply with modern social trends. The CEDAW Committee instructed Libya to alter its reading of the Quran with the following language:

... Members felt that the interpretation of the Quran had to be reviewed in the light of the provisions of the Convention and in the light of the current social environment....Efforts should be made to proceed to an interpretation of the Sharee'ah (Islamic Law) that was permissible and did not block the advancement of women.
The Government was urged to take a leading role in its interpretation of the Sharee'ah as a model for other Islamic countries.

It is difficult to imagine more treacherous or deliberate attacks on the values of religion, religious life, and the family. The principal goal of these organizations is to eliminate the traditional roles of men and women and replace them with the concept of "equality" or sameness. This is a feminist goal that has been operating during the last 50 years or more. The view of feminists is that women should be freed from the "bondage" of motherhood and allowed to participate equally with men in all aspects of life outside the home (i.e., economic, political, social). Childbearing and rearing are viewed as somehow "ignoble" and are discouraged. The role of motherhood has been denigrated and seen to be less valuable than a career outside the home. Inherent in all of this is a hostile attitude to longstanding notions of marriage, the natural family and the rearing of children.

There are some positive aspects to "empowerment of women" such as reducing discrimination, increasing education and literacy, improving quality of life, but with those efforts come the negative aspects as well. The insidious nature of the process is where the danger lies. For while on the face, there are honorable goals, the ultimate consequence is weakening of the family structure; the foundation upon which society is built.

A critical look will reveal that "Empowerment of Women" ultimately means that (super) women:
1. Work two jobs instead of one, having primary responsibility for the home and children even though they also work outside the home.
2. Often work in male-dominated environments, having daily contact with non-Mahram men.
3. Are forced to put their small children into daycare, even infants as young as 6 weeks old.
4. Spend, on an average, only 30 minutes a week in meaningful conversation with their children.
5. Suffer from depression two or three times the rate of men, along with other types of psychological distress, such as anxiety, stress reactions, etc.
6. Experience conflict between their feminine traits (e.g., nurturance, deference, affiliation, etc.) and the characteristics necessary for career success (e.g., assertiveness, autonomy, independence, etc).

It is not only the women who suffer, but the whole society as well. A look at the self-destruction of nations in the West, where motherhood is devalued the most, provides enough evidence. The murder, the drugs, the abuse ...these nations are crying out for their mothers; for it is the mother who provides stability to the community. It is the mother who will sacrifice all that she has for the sake of her children. It is the mother who will raise righteous children who will benefit society.

Allaah has created systems with balance and order, and when those systems are disrupted, humans suffer the consequences. The family is a system and it functions most effectively when the laws of nature and the laws of Allaah are implemented. Allaah Says what means: "Men are in charge of women by (right of) what (qualities) Allaah has given one over the other and what they spend (in support) from their wealth. So righteous women are devoutly obedient, guarding (the husband's) absence what Allaah would have them guard…” [Quran 4:34]

Allaah has made it clear in this verse that men are the protectors and maintainers of women and He has created each gender unique from the other. This in no way implies inferiority of one gender over the other, but it means that each gender fulfills specific functions and roles. Both roles are honorable and operate in a complementary manner. If Allaah had intended for men and women to be equal or then would it be necessary to have genders?

For Muslim women, we must realize that we do not require this type of "empowerment" or "liberation"; for the Muslim woman is already liberated. Her liberation comes through submission to her Creator and Sustainer. When we submit to Allaah we are liberated from the shackles of our selves and the deceits and trappings of this world. It is the "empowered" woman who works two jobs, both home and outside, who is actually in bondage and in need of freedom.

Muslim women have all the “power” that they need in this world and that power is Islam. Allaah has given us exactly what we need to be successful in this life and no convention or human law is going to improve upon that. Motherhood is an honorable gift given to us by Allaah and no one has the right to degrade that or take it away. In Islam, motherhood is held in the highest esteem, reflecting its significant nature. For, it is the righteous mothers of this world who will build healthy, stable and peaceful communities; not the CEO's of companies.

www.islamweb.net

Lovesickness.

2010-03-23T22:09:00.000-07:00

By no means is love a sickness in and of itself. Indeed, it is the only known cure for many of the problems and ailments that we as human beings suffer from. However, love can turn into an illness if it becomes obsessive, if it goes beyond its proper bounds, or if the object of love is not worthy. When such a situation develops, love indeed becomes a sickness requiring a remedy.

It is Allah’s order in the world that he sends down to it no affliction without sending down with it its cure. Love is no exception.

The treatment of this illness is as follows:

1. As with all diseases, an ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure.

This is why we must lower our gazes and resist taking a second glance at a member of the opposite sex who attracts us. Allah says: “Say to the believing men that they should lower their gaze and guard their chastity. That will make for greater purity for them, and Allah is acquainted with all that they do. And say to the believing women that they should lower their gaze and guard their chastity…” [Sûrah al-Nûr: 30-31]

We can see how Allah first issues the command to believing men, then repeats the command for believing women, thus emphasizing the importance of lowering our gazes. The fact that Allah addresses members of each sex individually shows just how important and relevant this matter is to people of both sexes. Indeed, these verses are one of the few occasions where Allah addresses men and women separately in the Qur’ân.

The look is the beginning that can lead to progressively greater ills. This is why Allah mentions it first, and then follows it up with the command for us to guard our chastity.

A poet long ago observed:

A glance, a smile, a friendly hello,
Some chatting, a date, then off they go!

If some of us find it difficult to carry out this command, they should write these verses down on a sheet of paper and hang them on their wall or place them on the dashboard – whatever it takes to remind them.

2. Thinking about the consequences is often a sobering dose of medicine.

The ability to think about the far-reaching consequences of our actions is one of the distinctive qualities that set humanity apart from other animals. This is why a person just does not go ahead and do everything that tickles his fancy. He first has to think about what is behind it and what will come of it.

For instance, he might pause to think, before embarking upon a certain course of action, that if he does so, he might succumb to AIDS. He might reflect upon how that dreaded disease has already claimed tens of millions of lives, how some of those who were careful – who chose only one sexual partner who even had an AIDS test – nevertheless came down with the disease.

How many people like that do we hear about, some of whom come out and admit that the disease befell them as a punishment from Allah, and hoping that it might at least expiate for their sin?

The same can be said for all the other sexually transmitted diseases. The worst thing of all is to think that an indiscreet man can infect his pious, faithful, and chaste wife with one of these vile diseases.

Another consequence to think about is pregnancy. A man who had repented for his sins once admitted to me that he had intentionally chosen to involve himself with a woman who was sterile. Regardless, Allah wanted her to fall pregnant and she did.

We should not be heedless of the consequences of our actions. Does anyone want to be responsible for someone coming into this world with no idea who his father is; someone who starts out life already disadvantaged?

Maybe one of us will pay the price for his misdeed in this world. Maybe he will get away with it here, going through life unrepentant and unscathed, only to be humiliated for it before the eyes of all on the Day of Judgment.

Some of the evil consequences of this behavior are psychological in nature. A man, once enamored of women, gets to the point that he can never be satisfied. He eternally craves variety and no degree of beauty is enough. Because of this, he may find himself eternally forbidden the lawful pleasure to be found within marriage. His senses and his sentiments have all been dulled.

Some young men travel abroad and spend their time in the company of prostitutes and other women of ill repute, but if one of them were ever to hear that his wife back home so much as looked at another man indiscreetly, he would divorce her on the spot.

One man lamented: “I would forsake all the women of the world for the sake of one woman whom I knew would get worried if I came home at night a little bit late.” This is the sentiment of any man who possesses wisdom.

3. The communion of lawful love is the best cure of all.

All of the stories of love that we find in our literature – whether it be that of Jamîl and Buthaynah, Kuthayyir and `Azzah, Qays and Laylâ, or for that matter their English equivalent Romeo and Juliet – deal with the anguish of unrequited love.

Allah has placed in what is lawful all that we need so we can dispense with what He has made unlawful. It provides the most fulfilling, satisfying, and deepest expression of love.

The Prophet (peace be upon him) said: “We see for those who are in love nothing better than marriage.” [Sunan Ibn Mâjah (1847) and Mustadrak Hâkim (2724) with a good chain of transmission]

Lawful matrimony is what brings healing to the heart and removes its disquiet. If it is not written for a certain man and women to come together in matrimony, each of them should have faith that there are many others out there with whom Allah can enrich them with a meaningful and loving relationship.

4. Resignation and a willingness to forsake what is wrong.

No matter how painful it may be to part, it is sometimes necessary. The Prophet (peace be upon him) said: “Whoever maintains his chastity, does so with the grace of Allah. Whoever finds self-sufficiency does so with what Allah has enriched him. Whoever is patient draws his fortitude from Allah. And no one has been given a gift better or more bountiful than patience.” [Sahîh al-Bukhârî (1469) and Sahîh Muslim (1053)]

Whoever gives something up for Allah’s sake should know that Allah will give him in its stead something far better.

5. Channeling one’s energies and abilities into what is nobler, more precious, and sublime – the love of Allah

We express this love by bringing benefit to His creatures, by our obedience to Him, by our prayers, our fasts, our remembrance of Him, our supplications, and our humility. We do so by keeping the company of righteous people and by aspiring to the noblest and most beneficial of goals.

We should channel our energies into what benefits us in our worldly lives and in our faith. Allah says: “Seek Allah’s help with patience and perseverance. It is indeed difficult except upon those who are humble.” [Sûrah al-Baqarah: 45]

He says: “Whoever puts his trust in Allah, sufficient is Allah for him.” [Sûrah al-Talâq: 3]

A heart that is full of concern for others will be a heart that is full of love – but not a slave to love. It is an empty heart that falls stricken for any visitor who graces its doorstep.

We should take full advantage of our lives and be as productive as possible. We need to develop our talents, our minds, and put our creativity into practice. Yes! Be enamored – but be enamored of truth and knowledge. Be fully in love – but be in love with righteousness.

By:Sheikh Salman al-Oadah

Ridaa Bil Qadaa- Contentment with Allah's Decree.

2010-03-13T20:44:00.000-08:00

At every stage in life, things are pre-ordained a certain way, which we might not like. Accepting them, however, will help us attain peace of mind.

Often since motherhood, I have caught myself critically analysing my reflection in the mirror: the added inches on the waist, the half-circles under the eyes, the white hair in the forelock that is now making its debut, and the slight double-chin. “Youth is wasted on the young” I muse. A few moments later, however, I realise what is happening, and chastise myself to stop it.

There was a time when I used to fantasise over open textbooks as an undergrad student - younger, fresh-faced and skinny - about whom I’d marry, how many children I would have, and what kind of family life I’d have beyond my twenties. With a start, I realise how, despite being given everything I wanted, I am instead brooding on that which I do not have anymore. When I had that narrow waist, I used to visualise myself with a baby bump!

The verb “qadaa” in Arabic means to decide, settle or judge. As a noun, Al-Qadaa refers to a binding decision that has been made. “Ridaa Bil Qadaa”, therefore, is a phrase that refers to a person’s pleasure with that which has been decreed by Allah. It is a state in which they do not feel ingratitude for their lot in life, but instead revel in a blissful, acquiescent acceptance of everything that Allah has pre-ordained for them.

It is common to behold the wistfulness people feel when they hear about the blessings of others. When a friend of ours got engaged during university, we were all happy for her, but when she started receiving lavish gifts from her in-laws, we sometimes found ourselves wishing to be in her place. As more friends got married, those who were single felt pangs of unhappiness and impatience at the arrival of their appointed time for marriage – their qadaa. Some wondered if it would ever arrive.

Every one of us experiences a vicious cycle of such feelings throughout life. After marriage, how quickly we forget our single days, and anxiously await the blue line on the pregnancy test. Once our first-born is a toddler, when we hear of a sister having her third baby, we start desiring our second one. Eventually, it’s the bigger house in the suburbs, the family van, and the foreign vacation. Every time, when Allah gives us what we pine for, we forget how we longed for it, and move on to the next item on our wish list.

It is a fact that Satan, our avowed enemy, tries to make us ungrateful for Allah’s blessings and favours upon us. He always reminds us of the things we do not have that we think will make us happier; making us dwell on what others have which we don’t; and making us despair of imminent relief from trials which we are facing in life.

The strategy that we should use to achieve Ridaa Bil Qadaa for ourselves has been provided for us by Islam. Prophet Muhammad SWT gave us the following advice:
“Look towards those who rank below you, so that you may get used to being thankful, and do not look at those who rank above you, lest you should despise the favours of Allah upon you” (Ibn Hibban).

The key to achieving Ridaa Bil Qadaa, therefore, is to consciously look only at those lower than us in worldly status and possessions, and deliberately refuse to look at, or think about, people who have more worldly blessings (talent, wealth, social acceptance, familial prestige, or good looks). Only when a believer obeys this advice of the Prophet r, will he be pleased with what Allah has decreed for him. Simultaneously, he will be able to eliminate envy, avarice, and competitiveness from his relationships with people.

Interestingly, the strategy recommended in the above hadith also exists in contemporary psychiatry and life coaching. Cognitive Behaviour Therapy (CBT) involves making a person alter his thinking by identifying each negative thought, assumption, belief or behaviour, and countering it with a forced, positive, beneficial one. In fact, Islam’s teachings of not suspecting ill from others, harbouring positive hopes for the future, focusing on the blessings we possess, and overlooking others’ weaknesses and misgivings, entirely embody the ‘positive thinking’ approach needed to achieve Ridaa Bil Qadaa: the ultimate peace of mind.

Allah SWT says in the Qur’an:

“And wish not for the things in which Allah has made some of you excel others” (An-Nisaa:32).

Therefore, the next time a sister’s spacious house makes you bemoan your cramped one, or your husband’s layoff undermines your financial security, or you hear of the impending marriage of an umpteenth sister much younger than you, or if you are forced to move to another city or country from the one that you love, or you give birth to the fifth child of the same gender, and that nagging feeling of indignation and ungratefulness creeps into your heart,know that it is totally up to you to be happy and satisfied with what Allah has chosen for you. Dwelling upon the supposedly fairerseeming, better-off circumstances of others will not improve your situation at all; in fact, it will deplete your strength to face it with patience. Besides, everyone has problems; it is just that you don’t know what they are!

In order to help believers achieve Ridaa Bil Qadaa, performing istikharah before picking a course of action or making a major decision is prescribed in Islam. Part of the du’a of istikharah goes: “If You know that this matter is good for me, in the matters of my deen, my life, and the outcome of all my affairs, then decree it for me. And if You know that it is bad for me, then turn it away from me, and turn me away from it, and make me pleased with it”. The latter part “make me pleased with it” enables a believer to achieve Ridaa Bil Qadaa even if the choice doesn’t work in his favour, knowing that if Allah willed it, it is good for him; this will make him satisfied with the outcome of that choice. He will never regretfully look back over his shoulder thinking “if only I...”

The wise believer struggles to harbour positive expectations of his future. He believes that if Allah has decreed something for him that he does not like, it is good for him - even if he cannot, due to limited knowledge and wisdom - decipher exactly how. Be it marital woes, injury, illness, infertility, or financial stress – we should accept the choices that Allah makes for us, remembering that He is merciful, and that His choices are best.

By Sadaf Farooqi

How to be successful in life.

2010-03-02T12:45:00.000-08:00

Praise be to Allah.

Peace of mind, contentment, happiness and freedom from worries and anxiety… these are what everyone wants, and these are the ways in which people can have a good life and find complete happiness and joy. There are religious means of achieving that, and natural and practical means, but no one can combine all of them except the believers; although other people may achieve some of them, they will miss out on others.

There follows a summary of the means of achieving this aim for which everyone is striving. In some cases, those who achieve many of them will live a joyful life and a good life; in other cases, those who fail to achieve all of them will live a life of misery and hardship. And there are others which are in between, according to what the means he is able to attain. These means include the following:

1 – Faith and righteous deeds:
This is the greatest and most fundamental of means. Allah says (interpretation of the meaning):

“Whoever works righteousness — whether male or female — while he (or she) is a true believer (of Islamic Monotheism) verily, to him We will give a good life (in this world with respect, contentment and lawful provision), and We shall pay them certainly a reward in proportion to the best of what they used to do (i.e. Paradise in the Hereafter)” (Quran, 16:97)

Allah tells us and promises us that whoever combines faith with righteous deeds will have a good life and a good reward in this world and in the Hereafter.
The reason for that is clear: those who believe in Allah – with sincere faith that motivates them to do righteous deeds that change hearts and attitudes and guides them to the straight path in this world and the Hereafter – follow principles and guidelines by means of which they deal with everything that happens to them, be it the causes of happiness and excitement or the causes of anxiety, worry and grief.

They deal with the things that they like by accepting them and giving thanks for them, and using them in good ways. When they deal with them in this manner, that creates in them a sense of excitement and the hope that it will continue and that they will be rewarded for their gratitude, which is more important than the good things that happen to them. And they deal with bad things, worries and distress by resisting those that they can resist, alleviating those that they can alleviate, and bearing with goodly patience those that they cannot avoid. Thus as a result of the bad things they gain a lot of benefits, experience, strength, patience and hope of reward, which are more important and which diminish the hardships they have undergone and replace them with happiness and hope for the bounty and reward of Allah.

The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) expressed this in a saheeh hadeeth in which he said: “How wonderful is the situation of the believer, for all his affairs are good. If something good happens to him, he gives thanks for it and that is good for him; if something bad happens to him, he bears it with patience, and that is good for him. This does not apply to anyone but the believer.” (Narrated by Muslim, no. 2999).
The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) told us that the believer is always gaining and the reward for his deeds is always multiplying, no matter what happens to him, good or bad.

2 – Being kind to people in word and deed, and all kinds of doing good.
This is one of the means of removing worry, distress and anxiety. By this means Allah wards off worries and distress from righteous and immoral like, but the believer has the greater share of that, and is distinguished by the fact that his kindness to others stems from sincerity and the hope of reward, so Allah makes it easy for him to be kind to others because of the hope that this will bring good things and ward off bad things, by means of his sincerity and hope of reward. Allah says (interpretation of the meaning):

“There is no good in most of their secret talks save (in) him who orders Sadaqah (charity in Allah's Cause), or Ma‘roof (Islamic Monotheism and all the good and righteous deeds which Allah has ordained), or conciliation between mankind; and he who does this, seeking the good Pleasure of Allah, We shall give him a great reward” (Quran, 4:114)

Part of that great reward is relief from worry, distress, troubles, etc.

3 – Another of the means of warding off anxiety that stems from nervous tension and being preoccupied with disturbing thoughts is to occupy oneself with good deeds or seeking beneficial knowledge, for that will distract one from dwelling on the matters that are causing anxiety. In this way a person may forget about the things that are making him worried and distressed, and he may become happy and more energetic. This is another means that believers and others have in common, but the believer is distinguished by his faith, sincerity and hope of reward when he occupies himself with that knowledge which he is learning or teaching, or with the good deeds that he is doing.
The work with which he occupies himself should be something that he likes and enjoys, for that is more likely to produce the desired results. And Allah knows best.

4 – Another thing that may ward off worry and anxiety is focusing all one’s thoughts of the present day, and not worrying about the future or grieving about the past. Hence the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) sought refuge with Allah from worry and regret, from regret for things in the past which one cannot put right or change, and worry which may come because of fear for the future. So one should focus only on the present day, and focus one's efforts on getting things right today. For if a person is focused on that, this means that he will do things properly and forget about worry and regret.

When the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said a du’aa’ or taught a du’aa’ to his Ummah, as well as urging them to seek the help of Allah and hope for His bounty, he was also urging them to strive to attain the thing they were praying for through their own efforts and to forget about the thing which they were praying would be warded off from them. Because du’aa’ (supplication) must be accompanied by action. So a person must strive to attain that which will benefit him in worldly and spiritual terms, and ask his Lord to make his efforts successful, and he should seek His help in that, as the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said:
“Strive for that which will benefit you and seek the help of Allah, and do not be helpless. If anything (bad) happens to you, do not say, ‘If only I had done such-and-such, then such-and-such would have happened.’ Rather you should say, ‘Qaddara Allah wa ma sha’a fa’ala (Allah decrees, and what He wills He does),’ for (the words) ‘If only’ open the door to the Shaytaan.” (Narrated by Muslim).
The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) connected the matter of striving to achieve good things with the matter of seeking the help of Allah and not giving in to feelings of helplessness which are a harmful kind of laziness, and with the matter of accepting things in the past which are over and done with, and acknowledging that the will and decree of Allah will inevitably come to pass. He described matters as being of two types:

1 – Matters which a person may strive to achieve or to achieve whatever he can of them, or to ward them off or alleviate them. In such cases a person must strive and make the effort, and also seek the help of Allah.

2 – Matters where such is not possible, so he must have peace of mind, accept them and submit to Allah's will.
Undoubtedly paying attention to this principle will bring happiness and relieve worry and distress.

5 – One of the greatest means of feeling content and relaxed and of acquiring peace of mind is to remember Allah a great deal (dhikr). That has a great effect in bringing contentment and peace of mind, and relieving worry and distress. Allah says:

“Verily, in the remembrance of Allah do hearts find rest” (Quran, 13:28)

Remembering Allah (dhikr) has a great effect in achieving this aim because it has a special influence and because of the hope that it brings of reward.

6 – Another of the means of bringing happiness and relieving worry and distress is striving to eliminate the things that cause worry and to achieve the things that bring happiness. That may be done by forgetting about bad things in the past which cannot be changed, and realizing that dwelling on them is a waste of time. So a person must strive to stop himself from thinking of that, and also strive to stop himself from feeling anxious about the future and the things that he may imagine of poverty, fear and other bad things that he thinks may happen to him in the future. He should realize that the future is something unknown, he cannot know what good or bad things are going to happen to him. That is in the hand of the Almighty, the Most Wise, and all that His slaves can do is to strive to attain the good things and to ward off the bad things. A person should realize that if he diverts his thoughts from worrying about his future and puts his trust in his Lord to take care of his situation, and puts his mind at rest concerning that, if he does that, then his heart will be at peace and his situation will improve and he will be relieved of worry and anxiety.

One of the most effective ways of dealing with worries about the future is to recite this du’aa’ which the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) used to recite:

“Allaahumma aslih li deeni alladhi huwa ‘ismatu amri, wa aslih li dunyaaya allati fiha ma’aashi, wa aslih li aakhirati allati ilayha ma’aadi, waj’al al-hayaata ziyaadatan li fi kulli khayr, wa’l-mawta raahatan li min kulli sharr (O Allah, correct my religious commitment which is the foundation of my life, and correct my worldly affairs in which is my livelihood, and grant me good in the Hereafter to which is my return. Make my life a means of accumulating good, and make death a respite for me from all evil).” (Narrated by Muslim, 2720)

And he said, “Allaahumma rahmataka arju fa la takilni ila nafsi tarfata ‘aynin wa aslih li sha’ni kullahu, laa ilaaha illa anta (O Allah, for Your mercy I hope, so do not abandon me to myself even for a moment. And correct all my affairs. There is no god but You).” (Narrated by Abu Dawood with a saheeh isnaad, no. 5090; classed as hasan by al-Albaani in Saheeh al-Kalim al-Tayyib, p. 49)

If a person utters these du’aa’s, which ask that his spiritual and worldly affairs may be set right or corrected, with proper presence of mind and sincerity of intention, whilst striving to achieve that, Allah will grant him what he has prayed for, hoped for and striven for, and He will turn his worry into joy and happiness.

7 – If a person experiences anxiety and distress because of a disaster, then one of the most effective means of relieving himself of that is to think of the worst scenario to which that may lead, and try to accept that. When he has done that, then he should try to alleviate it as much as possible. By means of this acceptance and these efforts, he will relieve himself of his worries and distress, and instead of worrying he will strive to bring about good things and to deal with whatever he can of the bad things.

If he is faced with things that cause fear or the possibility of sickness or poverty, then he should deal with that by striving to make himself accept that, or something even worse, with contentment, because by making himself accept the worst-case scenario, he lessens the impact of the thing and makes it seem less terrible, especially if he occupies himself with efforts to ward it off as much as he can. Thus as well as striving to achieve something good which will distract him from his worries about calamity, he will also renew his strength to resist bad things, and put his trust and reliance in Allah. Undoubtedly these matters are of great benefit in attaining happiness and peace of mind, as well as bringing the hope of reward in this world and in the Hereafter. This is something which is well known from the experience of many who have tried it.

8 – Steadfastness of heart and not being disturbed about the imaginary things that bad thoughts may bring to mind. For when a person gives in to his imagination and lets his mind be disturbed by these thoughts, such as fear of disease and the like, or anger and confusion stirred up by some grievous matter, or the expectation of bad things and the loss of good things, that will fill him with worries, distress, mental and physical illness and nervous breakdowns, which will have a bad effect on him and which causes a great deal of harm, as many people have seen. But when a person depends on Allah and puts his trust in Him, and does not give in to his imagination or let bad thoughts overwhelm him, and he relies on Allah and has hope of His bounty, that wards off his worries and distress, and relieves him of a great deal of mental and physical sickness. It gives indescribable strength, comfort and happiness to the heart. How many hospitals are filled with the mentally sick victims of illusions and harmful imagination; how often have these things had an effect upon the hearts of many strong people, let alone the weak ones; how often have they led to foolishness and insanity.

It should be noted that your life will follow your train of thought. If your thoughts are of things that will bring you benefit in your spiritual or worldly affairs, then your life will be good and happy. Otherwise it will be the opposite.
The person who is safe from all of that is the one who is protected by Allah and helped by Him to strive to achieve that which will benefit and strengthen the heart and ward off anxiety. Allah says (interpretation of the meaning):

“And whosoever puts his trust in Allah, then He will suffice him” (Quran, 65:3)

i.e., He will be sufficient for all that is worrying him in his spiritual and worldly affairs. The one who puts his trust in Allah will have strength in his heart and will not be affected by anything he imagines or be disturbed by events, because he knows that these are the result of vulnerable human nature and of weakness and fear that have no basis. He also knows that Allah has guaranteed complete sufficiency to those who put their trust in Him. So he trusts in Allah and finds peace of mind in His promise, and thus his worry and anxiety are dispelled; hardship is turned to ease, sadness is turned to joy, fear is turned to peace. We ask Allah to keep us safe and sound, and to bless us with strength and steadfastness of heart, and complete trust, for Allah has guaranteed all good things to those who put their trust in Him, and has guaranteed to ward off all bad and harmful things from them.
If bad things happen or there is the fear of such, then you should count the many blessings that you are still enjoying, both spiritual and worldly, and compare them with the bad things that have happened, for when you compare them you will see the many blessings that you are enjoying, and this will make the bad things appear less serious.
See al-Wasaa’il al-Mufeedah li’l-Hayaat al-Sa’eedah by Shatkh ‘Abd al-Rahmaan ibn Sa’di
Ibn al-Qayyim summed fifteen ways through which Allah may dispel worries and regret. These are as follows:

1- Tawheed al-Ruboobiyyah (belief in the Oneness of Divine Lordship)
2- Tawheed al-Uloohiyyah (belief in the Oneness of the Divine nature)
3- Tawheed of knowledge and belief (i.e., Tawheed al-Asma’ wa’l_Sifaat, belief in the Oneness of the Divine names and attributes)
4- Thinking of Allah as being above doing any injustice to His slaves, and above punishing anyone for no cause on the part of the slave that would require such punishment.
5- The person’s acknowledging that he is the one who has done wrong.
6- Beseeching Allah by means of the things that are most beloved to Him, which are His names and attributes. Two of His names that encompass the meanings of all other names and attributes are al-Hayy (the Ever-Living) and al-Qayyoom (the Eternal).
7- Seeking the help of Allah Alone.
8- Affirming one's hope in Him.
9- Truly putting one’s trust in Him and leaving matters to Him, acknowledging that one's forelock is in His hand and that He does as He wills, that His will is forever executed and that He is just in all that He decrees.
10- Letting one's heart wander in the garden of the Qur’aan, seeking consolation in it from every calamity, seeking healing in it from all diseases of the heart, so that it will bring comfort to his grief and healing for his worries and distress.
11- Seeking forgiveness.
12- Repentance.
13- Jihad.
14- Salah (prayer).
15- Declaring that he has no power and no strength, and leaving matters to the One in Whose hand they are.

We ask Allah to keep us safe and sound from worries and to relieve us of distress and anxiety, for He is the All-Hearing, Ever-Responsive, and He is the Ever-Living, Eternal.
See Alhomoom – Dealing with Worries and Stress, in the Books section of this site.
And Allah knows best. May Allah send blessings and peace upon our Prophet Muhammad and his family and companions.

Sheikh Muhammed Salih Al-Munajjid

Does Islam regard men and women as equal?

2009-12-25T12:14:00.000-08:00

Praise be to Allaah.

Firstly:

This word – equality – which many thinkers in both the east and the west advocate in various fields of life is a word which is based on deviation and a lack of understanding, especially when the speaker attributes this idea of equality to the Qur’aan and to Islam.

One of the things that people misunderstand is when they say that “Islam is the religion of equality”. What they should say is that Islam is the religion of justice.

Shaykh Ibn ‘Uthaymeen (may Allaah have mercy on him) said:
“Here we should note that there are some people who speak of equality instead of justice, and this is a mistake. We should not say equality, because equality implies no differentiation between the two. Because of this unjust call for equality, they started to ask, what is the difference between male and female?’ So they made males and females the same, and then the communists said, ‘What difference is there between ruler and subject? No one has any authority over anyone else, not even fathers and sons; the father has no authority over his son,’ and so on.

But if we say justice, which means giving each one that to which he or she is entitled, this misunderstanding no longer applies, and the word used is correct. Hence it does not say in the Qur’aan that Allaah enjoins equality, rather it says (interpretation of the meaning):

“Verily, Allaah enjoins Al‑‘Adl (i.e. justice)”
[al-Nahl 16:90]

“and that when you judge between men, you judge with justice”
[al-Nisa’ 4:58]

Those who say that Islam is the religion of equality are lying against Islam. Rather Islam is the religion of justice which means treating equally those who are equal and differentiating between those who are different.

No one who knows the religion of Islam would say that it is the religion of equality. Rather what shows you that this principle is false is the fact that most of what is mentioned in the Qur’aan denies equality, as in the following verses:

‘Say: Are those who know equal to those who know not?”
[al-Zumar 39:9]

‘Say: Is the blind equal to the one who sees? Or darkness equal to light?’
[al-Ra’d 13:16]

‘Not equal among you are those who spent and fought before the conquering (of Makkah, with those among you who did so later’
[al-Hadeed 57:10]

‘Not equal are those of the believers who sit (at home), except those who are disabled (by injury or are blind or lame), and those who strive hard and fight in the Cause of Allaah with their wealth and their live’
[al-Nisa’ 4:95]

Not one single letter in the Qur’aan enjoins equality, rather it enjoins justice. You will also find that the word justice is acceptable to people, for I feel that if I am better than this man in terms of knowledge, or wealth, or piety, or in doing good, I would not like for him to be equal to me.
Every man knows that he find it unacceptable if we say that the male is equal to the female.”
Sharh al-‘Aqeedah al-Waasitah,1/180-181

Based on this, Islam does not regard men and women as equal in matters where regarding them as equal would result in injustice to one of them, because equality that is inappropriate is a severe form of injustice.

The Qur’aan commands women to wear clothes that are different from those worn by men, because of the differences in the ways each sex is tempted by the other. The temptation posed by men is less than the temptation posed by women, so the clothes that women should wear are different than the clothes that men wear. It makes no sense to tell women to expose the parts of the body that men are allowed to expose, because of the differences in the temptation posed by a woman’s body and a man’s body – as we shall explain.

Secondly:

There are matters in which men and women are treated differently in Islamic sharee’ah, such as:

1 – Qiwaamah (being in charge of the household)
Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):
“Men are the protectors and maintainers of women, because Allaah has made one of them to excel the other, and because they spend (to support them) from their means”
[al-Nisa’ 4:34]

Ibn Katheer (may Allaah have mercy on him) said:
“Allaah says ‘Men are the protectors and maintainers of women’ meaning that the man is in charge of the woman, i.e., he is the leader and head of the household, the one who disciplines her if she goes astray.

‘because Allaah has made one of them to excel the other’ i.e., because men are superior to women and are better than women. Hence Prophethood was given only to men, as was the position of khaleefah, because the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said, ‘No people shall ever prosper who appoint a woman as their ruler.’ This was narrated by al-Bukhaari from the hadeeth of ‘Abd al-Rahmaan ibn Abi Bakrah from his father. The same applies to the position of qaadi (judge), etc.

‘and because they spend (to support them) from their means’ refers to the mahr and the spending on women’s maintenance that Allaah has enjoined upon men in His Book and in the Sunnah of His Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him). So a man is inherently better than a woman, and he is superior to her because he spends on her. So it is appropriate that he should be in charge of her, as Allaah says, ‘but men have a degree (of responsibility) over them’ [al-Baqarah 2:228].

‘Ali ibn Abi Talhah said, narrating from Ibn ‘Abbaas: ‘Men are the protectors and maintainers of women’ means that men are the leaders of women and they should obey them in areas where Allaah has enjoined obedience. Obedience may mean treating his family kindly and protecting his wealth.”
(Tafseer Ibn Katheer, 1/490)

2 – Testimony or bearing witness. The Qur’aan states that the testimony of one man is equivalent to the testimony of two women.
Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):
“And get two witnesses out of your own men. And if there are not two men (available), then a man and two women, such as you agree for witnesses, so that if one of them (two women) errs, the other can remind her”
[al-Baqarah 2:282]

Ibn Katheer said:
Two women are to take the place of one man because women are lacking in reason, as Muslim narrated in his Saheeh… from Abu Hurayrah that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “O women, give in charity and seek forgiveness a great deal, for I have seen that you form the majority of the people of Hell.” A wise woman among them said, “Why is it, O Messenger of Allaah, that we are the majority of the people of Hell?” He said, “Because you curse too much, and you are ungrateful to your spouses. I have seen none lacking in common sense and failing in religion but (at the same time) robbing the wisdom of the wise, besides you.” The woman asked: “O Messenger of Allaah, what is wrong with our common sense and our religion?” He said: “Your lack of common sense (can be well judged from the fact) that the evidence of two women is equal to that of one man, that is a proof of the lack of common sense, and you spend some nights (and days) in which you do not offer prayer and in the month of Ramadan (during the days) you do not observe fast, that is a failing in religion.”
(Tafseer Ibn Katheer, 1/336)

There may be some women who are wiser than some men, but this is not the usual rule and such women are not in the majority. Sharee’ah is based on what is general and most common.
The fact that women are lacking in reason does not mean that they are crazy, rather their reason is often overtaken by their emotions, and this happens to women more often than it happens to men. No one would deny this except one who is arrogant.

3 – A woman inherits half of what a man inherits.
Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):
“Allaah commands you as regards your children’s (inheritance): to the male, a portion equal to that of two females”
[al-Nisa’ 4:11]

Al-Qurtubi said:
Because Allaah knows better than they do what is in their best interests, He made the division of inheritance based on differentiation, because He knows what is in their best interests.
Tafseer al-Qurtubi, 5/164

For example, a man is obliged to spend more than a woman, so it is appropriate that he should have a larger share of inheritance than a woman.

4 – Clothing:

A woman’s ‘awrah includes her entire body. The least that can be said is that she should not uncover anything except her face and hands, and it was said that she should not even uncover that.
Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):
“O Prophet! Tell your wives and your daughters and the women of the believers to draw their cloaks (veils) all over their bodies (i.e. screen themselves completely except the eyes or one eye to see the way). That will be better, that they should be known (as free respectable women) so as not to be annoyed. And Allaah is Ever Oft‑Forgiving, Most Merciful”
[al-Ahzaab 33:59]

The ‘awrah of a man is the area from the navel to the knees.
It was said to ‘Abd-Allaah ibn Ja’far ibn Abi Taalib, “Tell us what you heard from the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) and what you saw of him, and do not tell us about anyone else, even if he was trustworthy.” He said, “I heard the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) say, ‘The area between the navel and the knee is ‘awrah.’”
Narrated by al-Haakim in al-Mustadrak (6418); classed as hasan by al-Albaani in Saheeh al-Jaami’, 5583.

Other examples include the following, which is not a comprehensive list.
There are other differences between the sexes, including the following:
· A man can marry four women, but a woman can only have one husband.
· A man has the right to issue a divorce and it is valid if he does so, but a woman does not have the right to issue a divorce.
· A man may marry a woman from among the People of the Book (Jews and Christians), but a Muslim woman may not marry anyone but a Muslim.
· A man may travel without his wife or any of his mahrams, but a woman may not travel unless she is accompanied by a mahram.
· Prayer in the mosque is obligatory for men, but not for women; a woman’s prayer in her house is more beloved to Allaah.
· A woman may wear silk and gold, but a man must not wear them.
Everything that we have mentioned is based on the difference between men and women, because the male is not like the female. Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):

"And the male is not like the female"
[Aal ‘Imraan 3:36]

The male is different from the female in many ways, in his strength, in his body, in his toughness and roughness, whereas women are soft and gentle.
And men are different in intellectual terms, for men are known for their strength of understanding and their memory as compared to women. Women are weaker than men in memory and forget more than men do. This is well known, for most of the reputable scholars in the world are men. There are some women who are more intelligent and have better memories than some men, but this does not cancel out the general rule. Most cases are as we have described above.

With regard to emotions, men speak of them when they get angry or when they are happy, but women are affected by the slightest emotional effects, so their tears flow at the slightest emotional provocation.
Jihad is obligatory for men, but jihad in the sense of fighting is not obligatory for women. This is the mercy of Allaah towards them, and consideration for their nature.

In conclusion we may say that the rulings for men are not like the rulings for women.

Thirdly:

Islam regards men and women as equally obliged with regard to many acts of worship and interactions with others. For example, women do wudoo’ just as men do, they do ghusl as men do, they pray as men do, and they fast as men do, except when they are menstruating or bleeding following childbirth. Women pay zakaah as men pay zakaah, and they do Hajj as men do, except for a few differences in the rulings. It is permissible and acceptable to buy from a woman, and if a woman gives charity, that is permissible. It is permissible for a woman to set free the slaves that she owns, and there are many other similar cases because women are the twin halves of men, as it says in the hadeeth:

It was narrated that ‘Aa’ishah said: The Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) was asked about a man who finds some wetness (on his clothes) but did not have an erotic dream, and he said, “He should do ghusl.” He was asked about a man who had an erotic dream but did not find any wetness, and he said, “He does not have to do ghusl.” Umm Salamah said, “O Messenger of Allaah, if a woman sees that, does she have to do ghusl?” He said, “Yes, for women are the twin halves of men.”
(Narrated by al-Tirmidhi, 113; Ahmad, 25663. Classed as saheeh by al-Albaani in Saheeh al-Tirmidhi, 98)

Conclusion:

Women are like men in some aspects and they differ from them in others. Most of the rulings of Islam apply to men and women equally. In cases where a distinction is made between the sexes, the Muslim regards that as a mercy from Allaah and a sign of His knowledge of His creation, but the arrogant kaafir sees it as oppression and injustice, so he stubbornly insists on claiming that men and women are the same. So let him tell us how a man can carry a foetus and breastfeed it? He stubbornly ignores the weakness of women and how they bleed during their monthly period, and he stubbornly beat his head against the rock of reality. But the Muslim is still at peace with his faith, surrendering to the command of Allaah.
“Should not He Who has created know? And He is the Most Kind and Courteous (to His slaves), All‑Aware (of everything)”
[al-Mulk 67:14 – interpretation of the meaning]

And Allaah knows best.

Sheikh Muhammed Salih Al-Munajjid
Islamqa.com

Education of Women in Islam.

2009-12-14T11:40:00.000-08:00

Some prejudiced and ignorant people claim that Islam does not encourage women to be educated and that it prefers women to be ignorant or close to it. This is a biased, unfounded allegation against Islam. Indeed, there is no religion or doctrine on earth that encourages man to seek knowledge as much as Islam. Islam strongly encourages humans, both men and women, to acquire knowledge in all fields of life, as well as to research and reach the facts.

Islam defines knowledge to be the correct way to know Allaah The Almighty, have belief in Him, and surrender to His Sharee‘ah. Were not the first verses revealed to the Prophet, sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, a strong declaration of this fact? The first verses that were revealed to the Prophet, sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, are those in which Allaah The Almighty addressed His Messenger, sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, Saying (what means): {Recite in the Name of your Lord Who created. Created man from a clinging substance. Recite, and your Lord is The Most Generous. Who taught by the pen. Taught man that which he knew not.} [Quran 96: 1-5]

This is a command to recite in the name of the Creator who created humans, both men and women, from a clinging substance. This refers to the fact that the creation of Allaah The Almighty is the field for humans to seek knowledge, and that this will guide them to the way of Allaah The Almighty. Researching what Allaah The Almighty created is the closest and best way for the seekers of knowledge and the pursuers of the truth, wherever they may be and in whichever scientific field they may be engaged.

The revelation began with a command to read, because reading is the most important means of consolidating knowledge and continuing with it. Reading comes after writing, which is why Allaah The Almighty displayed His favor upon His slaves since He taught humans to write with pens which is the greatest tool of writing. This means that Allaah The Almighty has taught all humans - male and female.

This call with which Allaah The Almighty invites humans to seek knowledge and establish sciences, since the very beginning of Islam, is the greatest evidence of the full equality between man and woman with regard to calling them to science, knowledge, pondering on the creation of Allaah The Almighty, and using the two correlated means of knowledge; namely, reading and writing.

Knowledge is the way to know Allaah The Almighty, have faith in Him, and know the rulings of the religious obligations for both men and women. It is a must for every Muslim man and woman to learn all that guides him or her to know the teachings and ordinances of their religion that each of them has to abide by, because each man and woman will be individually reckoned for their acts before Allaah The Almighty.

Humans, both men and women, are tried in this life. Each one is fully responsible for his actions as long as he or she is competent, and as long as he or she possesses reason, will, and ability.

Since humans are responsible for their actions, they are obligated to acquire all that will enable them to distinguish between truth and falsehood, goodness and evil, benefit and harm, and to know the boundaries of his responsibility before Allaah The Almighty.

Islam is very keen on teaching woman all that makes her an element of goodness and reform in a secure, happy Islamic society that develops towards perfectionand advances towards power and glory.

To do so, Islam is keen on women attending Islamic assemblies, large and small. Islam encourages women to perform the congregational Salaahs (prayers), to attend the Friday Salaah and sermon, and the Salaah and sermon of ‘Eed even if she has the excuse that prevents her from performing the prayer. Islam also orders women to perform Hajj (pilgrimage) and ‘Umrah (lesser pilgrimage), and encourages her to attend sessions for religious knowledge. Moreover, Allaah The Almighty addresses both men and women together, except in a few cases, which shows His keenness on educating them, cultivating them, teaching them the matters of their religion and allowing them to take part in the issues facing Muslims.

A look at the reality of life shows us how important it is for a woman to be upright, knowledgeable, and well-mannered, for the sake of her family and then for the good of the entire society. The extent of a woman's uprightness or corruption within her family determines the extent of the uprightness or corruption of her children.

In addition to this, the woman greatly influences the man whether he is a husband, a father or a brother. The woman's uprightness is more important for the family than the man's uprightness, because the woman can play an effective role in either guiding or corrupting the formation of manners, principles, and habits in young children; this role is much more important than man's role for many reasons:

1- Allaah The Almighty has endowed woman with flowing sentiment, a lenient disposition and an ability to be involved and take part in the life of children in accordance with their mentality and nature. This makes her acquire the children's love and confidence, so they imitate her behavior and all that she says or does.
2- The woman accompanies her children most of the time when they are being brought up. During this stage, a child still has a pure human nature and is like soft dough that can be adapted to traditions and customs.

Since women have this great impact on raising children inside or outside her family, they must be properly qualified so as to be a righteous, good example. This can only be done through teaching women how to become righteous educators to bring up children in a good, Islamic way and make use of their gentle sentiment to fill their hearts and souls with faith and goodness so that these women would be able to pass them on to the generation which she is raising and educating.

When we see upright, well-mannered children and investigate the reason behind this, we come to know that they have a righteous, upright, well-mannered mother, even if their father is not so. Similarly, when we see corrupt, deviated children and search for the reason behind this, we realize that they have a corrupt mother, even though their father may be righteous and well-mannered.

Due to these factors and examples that call for the reformation of the education of women and refining their behavior and morals so they would be righteous caretakers, it is no wonder that Islam is keen on teaching women. The Prophet, sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, would dedicate specific days for women to gather, in addition to the days when they would attend with men, so that he would be able to teach them the divine knowledge which Allaah The Almighty taught and are related to women only, particularly due to their physical and psychological formation. They had the courage to request that from the Prophet, sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam; a request that he responded positively to.

Abu Sa‘eed Al-Khudri said,

A woman came to the Prophet, sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, and said, “O Messenger of Allaah, the men get all your speech, so devote to us a day on which we may come to you so that you would teach us of what Allaah has taught you.” The Prophet, sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, said: “Gather on such-and-such a day.” They gathered and the Prophet, sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, came to them and taught them of what Allaah had taught him. He then said: “No woman of you gives three children [i.e., loses them to death] except that they will screen her from the Fire.” A woman said, “O Messenger of Allaah, and two [of her children]?” The Prophet, sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, replied: “And two!” [Al-Bukhaari and Muslim]

This was a woman from the Companions who politely and courageously went to the Prophet, sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, and confidently addressed him, saying, "Men get all your speech, so devote to us a day on which we may come to you so that you would teach us of what Allaah The Almighty has taught you.”

As men would sit at the front of the sessions of the Prophet, sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, most of the words, admonitions and statements were directed at them. Although the call of Islam, its rulings, obligations, and admonitions concern both men and women, some issues and rulings are specific to women, while some others are specific to men.

The men obtained their share of knowing the rulings that are specific to them because they could easily and directly speak to the Prophet, sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam; they were also bold enough to ask about every matter in their religion. They could ask the Prophet, sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, at any time, whereas women could not always ask about the religious rulings that were specific to women or the solutions to their problems. Even if they could attend the sessions of the Prophet, sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, without intermixing with men, they might have felt too shy to ask about their specific matters in the presence of men. Therefore, teaching them the rulings that were specific to them and solving their problems entailed dedicating special sessions for them to discuss their issues and give them the rulings and provide them with the teachings in accordance with their psychological, intellectual, moral, and social characteristics as well as in accordance with their responsibility in their life inside and outside their families. For all these reasons, this woman demanded that a specific time be allocated for women to be taught the matters of religion that were specific to them, and for the same reasons the Prophet, sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, accepted and answered her demand.

This is the correct way for women to be educated and driven out of the darkness of ignorance into the light of knowledge, so that they would fulfill their responsibility in this life in the best and most perfect way. Also, in this way, they can properly bear the responsibility while maintaining their chastity and modesty, without being cast into an intermixed society that quickly adopts the corruption that is typical of such societies, causing women to suffer from the desires that trigger acts of disobedience, sins and many other forms of immorality to spread.

Sound knowledge is the first means for reforming any society including men and women; both the old and the young.

Muslim women, in the beginning of the first Islamic era, were enthusiastic to learn the teachings of their religion and the rulings that addressed their specific issues. They gathered at the special sessions which the Prophet, sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, dedicated for them. The Prophet, sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, came to them at specified times; he taught them from what Allaah The Almighty taught him and he explained matters to them. They asked him about many issues and he answered them.

Some female Companions of the Ansaar were bold enough to ask about the issues that were specific to women. ‘Aa’ishah praised them saying, “May Allaah have mercy upon the women of Al-Ansaar; their bashfulness did not prevent them from asking about the matters of their religion.”

At this exalted standard, Islam defined its policy for women's education. Having manifested all these facts, would the enemies of Islam still have anything to say in order to delude people about the issue of women's education, as part of their attempt to give a false image about Islam? With this full equality between men and women concerning both knowledge and deeds, would the complaints of those who try to distort the wonderful image of Islam continue to hurt our ears with things that cause a sound disposition to be repulsed?

From Islamweb.net

Top Ten Excuses Of Muslim Women Who Don't Wear Hijaab And Their Obvious Weaknesses.

2009-12-09T11:14:00.000-08:00

By Dr. Huwayda Ismaeel

All praise is due to Allah Ta'aala as is deserved by His Majesty and Great Power. I send prayers and ask for blessings upon His Noble Messenger who drew the path for us to the pleasure of Allah and His Jannah. This path is a straight one that is surrounded by virtue from all sides and attends to the best moral characteristics which are increased by the clothing of purity, concealment, and chastity. It is the path trod by the two halves of human society, namely the man and the woman, toward harmonious contentment and happiness in this life and the Hereafter.

This is precisely why the Protector, the blessed and above all imperfection, has made wearing hijaab an obligation upon the woman as a safeguard of her chastity and protection of her honor and sign of her faith (Eemaan). It is on account of this that societies (both Muslim and non-Muslim) that have distanced themselves from the way of Allah and deviated from His straight path, are ill societies in need of treatment that will lead them to recovery and happiness.

Among the pictures that point to the distance of society from that path and that make clear the level of its deviation and separation from it is the open spread of women not just uncovering their faces but enhancing and making a display of their beauty. We find that, regretfully, this is commonly manifested in Islamic (Muslim) society despite the fact Islamic clothing is also widespread (and available). So then, what are the reasons that have led to this digression?

We put this question to a varied group of women from whom we derived ten major excuses and upon examination and scrutiny, the frailty of the excuses became evident to us.

Stay with us dear Muslim sister in these few lines so that we can know through them the reasons for turning away from the hijaab and then discuss each:

Excuse One: I'm not yet convinced (of the necessity) of hijaab.

We then ask this sister two questions:

One: Is she truly convinced of the correctness of the religion of Islam?

The natural answer is: Yes, she is convinced, for she responds "Laa ilaaha illallah!" (There is no God but Allah), meaning she is convinced of the 'aqeedah, and then she says: "Muhammadun rasoolullah!" (Muhammad is the Messenger of Allah), meaning by that that she is convinced of its legislation or law (sharee'ah). Therefore, she is convinced of Islam as a belief system and a law by which one governs and rules her life.

Two: Is the hijaab then a part of Islamic Law (sharee'ah) and an obligation?

If this sister is honest and sincere in her intention and has looked into the issue as one who truly wants to know the truth her answer could only be: "Yes". For Allah ta'aala, Whose Divinity (Uloohiyyah) she believes in has commanded wearing hijaab in His Book (Al-Qur'aan); and the noble Prophet, ('alaihi salaat wa salaam) whose message she believes in, has commanded wearing the hijaab in his sunnah.

What do we call a person who says they believe in and are content with the correctness of Islam but who nonetheless does not do what Allah or His Messenger have ordered? Certainly they can in no way be described as those whom Allah speaks of in this aayah:

The only saying of the faithful believers when they are called to Allah and His Messenger to judge between them is that they say 'we hear and obey' and such are the successful. [Soorah An-Noor 24:51]

In summary: If this sister is convinced of Islam, how then can she not be convinced of its orders?

Excuse Two: I am convinced of Islamic dress but my mother prevents me from wearing it and if I disobey her I will go to the Fire.

The one who has answered this excuse is the most noble of Allah's creation, the Messenger of Allah (sallallahu 'alaihi wa sallam) in concise and comprehensive words of wisdom: There is no obedience to the created in the disobedience of Allah. [Ahmed]

The status of parents in Islam, especially the mother, is a high and elevated one. Indeed Allah ta'aala has combined it with the greatest of matters, worshipping Him and His tawheed, in many aayaat.

He stated: Worship Allah and join none with Him and do good to parents. [Soorah An-Nisaa 4:36] Obedience to parents is not limited except in one aspect, and that is if they order to disobedience of Allah. Allah said: But if they strive with you to make you join in worship with Me others that of which you have no knowledge, then obey them not. [Soorah Luqmaan 31:15]

The lack of obedience to them in sinfulness does not prevent being good to them and kind treatment of them. Allah said afterward in the same aayah: But behave with them in the world kindly.

In summary: How can you obey your mother and disobey Allah, Who created you and your mother?

Excuse Three: My position does not allow me to substitute my dress for Islamic dress.

This sister is either one or the other of two types: She is sincere and honest, or she is a slippery liar who desires to make a showy display of her "hijaab" clamoring with colors to be "in line with the times" and expensive.

We will begin with an answer to the honest and sincere sister:

Are you unaware my dear sister, that it is not permissible for the Muslim woman to leave her home in any instance unless her clothing meets the conditions of Islamic hijaab (Hijaab shar'ee) and it is a duty of every Muslim woman to know what they are? If you have taken the time and effort to learn so many matters of this world how then can you be neglectful of learning those matters which will save you from the punishment of Allah and His anger after death!? Does Allah not say: Ask the people of remembrance (i.e. knowledgeable scholars) if you do not know. [Soorah An-Nahl 16:43]. Learn therefore, the requirements of proper hijaab.

If you must go out, then do so only with the correct hijaab, seeking the pleasure of Allah and the degradation of Shaitaan. That is because the corruption brought about by your going out adorned and "beautified" is far greater than the matter which you deem necessary to go out for.

My dear sister if you are really truthful in your intention and correctly determined you will find a thousands hands of good assisting you and Allah will make the matter easy for you! Is He not the One Who says: And whoever fears Allah and keeps his duty to Him, He will make a way for him to get out (from every difficulty) and He will provide him from sources he never could imagine. [Soorah At-Talaaq 65:2-3]?

With regards to the 'slippery' one we say:

Honor and position is something determined by Allah Ta'aala and it is not due to embellishment of clothing and show of colors and keeping up with the trendsetters. It is rather due to obedience to Allah and His Messenger (sallallahu 'alaihi wa sallam) and holding to the pure law of Allah and correct Islamic hijaab. Listen to the words of Allah: Indeed, the most honorable amongst you are those who are the most pious. [Soorah Al-Hujuraat 49:35]

In summary: Do things in the way of seeking Allah's pleasure and entering His Jannah and give less value to the high priced and costly objects and wealth of this world.

Excuse Four: It is so very hot in my country and I can't stand it. How could I take it if I wore the hijaab?

Allah gives an example by saying: Say: The Fire of Hell is more intense in heat if they only understand. [Soorah At-Taubah 9:81]

How can you compare the heat of your land to the heat of the Hellfire?

Know, my sister, that Shaitaan has trapped you in one of his feeble ropes to drag you from the heat of this world to the heat of the Hellfire. Free yourself from his net and view the heat of the sun as a favor and not an affliction especially in that it reminds you of the intensity of the punishment of Allah which is many times greater than the heat you now feel. Return to the order of Allah and sacrifice this worldly comfort in the way of following the path of salvation from the Hellfire about which Allah says: They will neither feel coolness nor have any drink except that of boiling water and pus. [Soorah An-Naba' 78:24-25]

In summary: The Jannah is surrounded by hardships and toil, while Hellfire is surrounded by temptations, lusts and desires.

Excuse Five: I'm afraid that if I wear the hijaab I will take it off at another time because I have seen so many others do so!

To her I say: If everyone was to apply your logic then they would have left the Deen in its entirety! They would have left off salaat because some would be afraid of leaving it later. They would have left fasting in Ramadhan because so many are afraid of not doing it later, etc. Haven't you seen how Shaitaan has trapped you in his snare again and blocked you from guidance?

Allah Ta'aala loves continuous obedience even if it be small or recommended. How about something that is an absolute obligation like wearing hijaab? The prophet (sallallahu 'alaihi wa sallam) said: The most beloved deed with Allah is the consistent one though it be little.Why haven't you sought out the causes leading those people to leave off the hijaab so that you can avoid them and work to keep away from them? Why haven't you sought out reasons and causes to affirm truth and guidance until you can hold firm to them?

Among these causes is much supplication to Allah (du'aa) to make the heart firm upon the Deen as did the prophet (sallallahu 'alaihi wa sallam). Also is making salaat and having mindfulness of it as Allah stated:

And seek help in patience and the prayer and truly it is extremely heavy except for the true believers in Allah who obey Allah with full submission and believe in His promise of Jannah and in His warnings (Al-Khaashi'oon). [Soorah Al-Baqarah 2:45]

Other causes to put one upon guidance and truth is adherence to the laws of Islam and one of them is indeed wearing the hijaab. Allah said: If they had done what they were told, it would have been better for them and would have strengthened their faith. [Soorah Al-Baqarah 2:66]

In summary: If you hold tight to the causes of guidance and taste the sweetness of faith you will not neglect the orders of Allah after having held to them.

Excuse Six: If I wear the hijaab then nobody will marry me, so I'm going to leave it off until then.

Any husband who desires that you be uncovered and adorned in public in defiance of and in disobedience to Allah, is not a worthy husband in the first place. He is a husband who has no feeling to protect what Allah has made inviolable, most notably yourself, and he will not help you in any way to enter Al-Jannah or escape from the Hellfire. A home which is founded upon disobedience to Allah and provocation of His anger is fitting that He decree misery and hardship for it in this life and in the Hereafter. As Allah stated: But whosoever turns away from My reminder (i.e. neither believes in the Qur'aan nor acts upon its teachings) verily for him is a life of hardship and We shall raise him up blind on the Day of Resurrection. [Soorah Ta Ha 20:124]

Marriage is a favor and blessing from Allah to whom He give whom He wills. How many women who wear hijaab (mutahajibah) are in fact married while many who don't aren't? If you were to say that '..my being made-up and uncovered is a means to reach a pure end, namely marriage', a pure goal or end is not attained through impure and corrupt means in Islam. If the goal is honorable then it must necessarily be achieved by pure and clean method. We say the rule in Islam is: The means are according to the rules of the intended goals.

In summary: There is no blessing in a marriage established upon sinfulness and corruption.

Excuse Seven: I don't wear hijaab based on what Allah says: And proclaim the grace of your Rabb [Soorah Ad-Dhuhaa 93:11] How can I cover what Allah has blessed me with of silky soft hair and captivating beauty?

So this sister of ours adheres to the Book of Allah and its commands as long as they coincide with her personal desires and understanding! She leaves behind those matters when they don't please her. If this was not the case, then why doesn't she follow the aayah: And do not show off their adornment except only that which is apparent [Soorah An-Noor 24:31] and the statement of Allah subhaanah: Tell your wives and your daughters and the women of the believers to draw their cloaks all over their bodies [Soorah Al-Ahzaab 33:59]?

With this statement my sister you have now made a shari'ah (law) for yourself of what Allah Ta'aala has strictly forbidden, namely beautification (at-tabarruj) and uncovering (as-sufoor), and the reason: Your lack of wanting to adhere to the order. The greatest blessing or favor that Allah has bestowed upon us is that of Eemaan (faith) and hidaayah (guidance) and among them is the Islamic hijaab. Why then do you not manifest and talk about this greatest of blessings given to you?

In summary: Is there a greater blessing and favor upon the woman than guidance and hijaab?

Excuse Eight: I know that hijaab is obligatory (waajib), but I will wear it when Allah guides me to do so.

We ask this sister on what plans or steps she will undertake until she accepts this divine guidance? We know that Allah has in His wisdom made a cause or means for everything. That is why the sick take medicine to regain health, and the traveler rides a vehicle or an animal to reach his destination, and other limitless examples.

Has this sister of ours seriously endeavored to seek true guidance and exerted the proper means to get it such as: Supplicating Allah sincerely as He stated: Guide us to the Straight Path. [Soorah Al-Faatihah 1:6]; Keeping company with the righteous good sisters - for they are among the best to assist her to guidance and to continue to point her to it until Allah guides her and increases her guidance and inspires her to further guidance and taqwaa. She would then adhere to the orders of Allah and wear the hijaab that the believing women are commanded to wear.

In summary: If this sister was really serious about seeking guidance she would have exerted herself by the proper means to get it.

Excuse Nine: It's not time for that yet. I'm still too young for wearing hijaab. I'll do it when I get older and after I make Hajj!

The Angel of Death my sister, is visiting and waiting at your door for the order of Allah Ta'aala to open it on you at any moment in your life. Allah said: When their term comes, neither can they delay it nor can they advance it an hour (or a moment). [Soorah Al-An'aam 7:34]. Death my sister doesn't discriminate between the young or the old and it may come while you are in this state of great sinfulness disobedience, fighting against the Lord of Honor with your uncovering and shameless adornment. My sister, you should race to obedience along with those others who race to answer the call of Allah tabaaraka wa ta'aala: Race with one another in hastening towards forgiveness from your Lord and Paradise the width whereof is as the width of the heavens and the earth. [Soorah Al-Hadeed 57:21]

Sister, don't forget Allah or He will forget you by turning His mercy away from you in this life and the next. You are forgetting your own soul by not fulfilling the right of your soul to obey Allah and proper worship of Him. Allah stated about the hypocrites (Al-Munaafiqoon): And be not like those who forgot Allah and He caused them to forget their own selves. [Soorah Al-Hashr 59:19] My sister, wear the hijaab in your young age in opposition to the sinful deeds because Allah is intense in punishment and will ask you on the Day of Resurrection about your youth and every moment of your life.

In summary: Stop presuming some future expectation in your life will indeed occur! How can you guarantee your own life until tomorrow?

Excuse Ten: I'm afraid that if I wear Islamic clothing that I'll be labeled as belonging to some group or another and I hate partisanship.

My sister in Islam, there are only two parties in Islam, and they are both mentioned by Allah Almighty in His Noble Book. The first party is the party of Allah (hizbullah) that He gives victory to because of their obedience to His commands and staying away from what He has forbidden. The second party is the party of the accursed Shaitaan (hizbush-Shaitaan) which disobeys the Most Merciful and increase corruption in the earth. When you hold tight to and adhere to the commands of Allah, and among them is wearing the hijaab - you then become a part of the successful party of Allah. When you beautify and display your charms you are riding in the boat of Shaitaan and his friends and partners from among the hypocrites and the disbelievers and none worse could there be as friends.

Don't you see how you are running from Allah and to the Shaitaan, trading filth for good? Run instead my sister to Allah and follow His way: So flee to Allah (from His Torment to His mercy). Verily I (Muhammad) am a plain warner to you from Him. [Soorah Adh-Dhaariyaat 51:50] The hijaab is a high form of worship that is not subject to the opinions of people and their orientations and choices because the one who legislated it is the Most Wise Creator.

In summary: In the way of seeking the pleasure of Allah and in hope of His Mercy and success in His Jannah and throw the statements of the devils among people and jinn against the wall! Hold tight to the legislation of Allah by your molars and follow the example of the striving and knowledgeable Mothers of the Believers and the female companions (radiallahu 'anhum ajma'een).

In Conclusion

Your body is on display in the market of Shaitaan seducing the hearts of men.The hairstyles, the tight clothing showing every detail of your figure, the short dresses showing off your legs and feet, and the showy, decorative and fragrant clothing all anger the Merciful and please the Shaitaan. Every day that passes while you are in this condition distances you further from Allah and brings you closer to Shaitaan. Each day curses and anger are directed toward you from the heavens until you repent. Every day brings you closer to the grave and the Angel of Death is ready to capture your soul.

Everyone shall taste death. And only on the Day of Resurrection shall you be paid your wages in full. And whoever is removed away from the Hellfire and admitted to Al-Jannah, is indeed successful. The life of this world is only the enjoyment of deception (a deceiving thing). [Soorah Aale 'Imraan 3:185]

Get on the train of repentance my sister, before it passes by your station. Deeply consider my sister, what is happening today before tomorrow comes. Think about it, my sister - Now, before it is too late!

To A Non-Muslim Woman.

2009-11-30T11:31:00.000-08:00

When you look at me
All that you see
is the scarf that covers my hair
My words you can't hear
because you're too full of fear,
mouth gaping, all you do is stare.

You think it's not my choice
in your own "liberation" you rejoice.
You think I'm uneducated,
trapped, oppressed and subjugated,
You're so thankful that you're free.

But non-Muslim woman you've got it wrong:
You're the weak and I'm the strong.
For I've rejected the trap of man:
Fancy clothes - low neck, short skirt,
those are devices for pain and hurt.
I'm not falling for that little plan.

I'm a person with ideas and thought.
I'm not for sale, I can't be bought.
I'm me - not a fancy toy,
I won't decorate anyone's arm,
nor be promoted for my charm.
There is more to be than playing coy.

Living life as a balancing game - mother,
daughter, wife, nurse, cleaner, cook, lover
and still bring home a wage.
Who thought up this modern "freedom"?
Where man can love 'em and man can leave 'em.
This is not free, but life in a cage.
Always jumping to a male agenda
competing on his terms.
No job share, no creche facilities,
no feeding and nappy changing amenities
No time off for menstrual pain,
"hormones," they laugh, "what a shame!"
No equal pay for equal skill;
your job they can always fill.
No promotion unless you're sterilised.
No promotion unless you're sexually terrorised.
And this is liberation?

Non-Muslim woman you can have your life.
Mine - it has less strife.
I cover and I get respected,
surely that's to be expected,
for I won't demean the feminine,
I won't live to male criterion,
I dance to my own tune
and I hope you see this very soon.
For your own sake - wake up and use your sight.
Are you so sure that you are right?

****

From Jannah.org

Why Women Are Coming to Islam.

2009-11-25T11:55:00.000-08:00

There are many stories of conversions to the deen of Allah. Many are very touching and poignant and serve us as a reminder that Allah guides who he wills often in ways and in circumstances we would never imagine. We would like to highlight in this article that among the most inspiring and illustrative of the fact that a pure heart and intention is rewarded with guidance, are those stories of our Muslim sisters who have accepted Islam.

Considering the intense anti-Islamic and hostile media propaganda these past few years, some with a particularly strong emphasis on the 'supposed' degrading position of women in Islam, we feel that those women are exceptional who accept Islam and who were able to separate the negative stereotyping and nonsense from the reality of faith.

Women are most clearly the signposts of Islam and whether we Muslim men like it or not, we are often judged by the perception people have of just how we treat our women. Muslim women stand out more so than men when they fully practice their religion, one reason obviously being their observance of Islamic dress or hijaab that covers and obscures the shape of their bodies completely and in many cases the face as well. However, what most people are not aware of is what is 'beyond the veil' (to borrow a title from one of the plethora of anti-Islamic books on Muslim women).

Seeing Through The Fog

Muslim women, especially converts, are by no means the empty-headed, submissive, rejects of western society that some essays and articles written by so-called journalists and researchers would have us believe. Most of those non-Muslim writers in many cases just seek to find the sensational or even make it up to sell books or papers or to serve their own preset agendas or to validate their own philosophical or ideological positions. They usually fail miserably to understand or relate the true underlying reasons for so many Muslim women's acceptance of and strict adherence to Islam.

It is this writer's opinion that much of what is written by such people, especially the women amongst them, stems from their inability to face the reality of the true motivations of intelligent, thoughtful, western women, both young and old, for accepting Islam. It would be an indictment of the shortcomings within their own culture and lifestyles and perhaps force even their own personal revaluation which often involves the type of critical examination that most people simply choose to avoid. Biased, slanted, and incomplete reporting is often due to plain old ignorance and significant doses of arrogance and pride.

The acceptance of Islam by women has mostly nothing to do with mere rejection of cultural tradition, men, or economics so much as it does with a sincere search for the truth motivated by a strong desire to serve Allah properly. It becomes clear to the thoughtful, truth seeking woman that what western society and culture (or eastern for that matter), even at its highest levels has to offer, is a far cry from what they, and all women, need. Namely, true freedom from the oppression of men and the tyranny of religion. Spiritual fulfillment and right guidance and living that leads to real happiness and satisfaction as well as true success in this life and the life to come is what they seek. Only real Islam offers this.

We present the true stories of two such thoughtful women to serve us all as a reminder of the substance of this great deen and the kind of consideration each and every person should give to his or her role and purpose in life and their relationship with Allah. Some editing has been done only for the sake of space and minor grammatical corrections.

Background Of A European Catholic Girl

"As a child I believed in God. My family was Christian (Catholic). After the death of my mother ... we did not often go to church but Christian values were a part of my upbringing. I had a strong faith in God. At school we were taught that Jesus ('alaihi salaam) was the son of God who came down to earth to save us from our sins. For some reason, alhamdulillah, I never took these stories seriously. I believed of course in Jesus ('alaihi salaam) but not really as the son of God. Christians pray to Jesus ('alaihi salaam): I prayed only to God....

As a teenager I questioned my faith for the first time. I wanted spiritual fulfillment for I did not feel at ease in the culture I was growing up in. However, I always felt disappointed when I went to churches. I could not accept the words in the hymns and prayers that spoke of father God and a son Jesus. The church failed to touch my heart and so I turned away from religion altogether as many western people have done....For many years I was then lost and confused. Christianity, being the only faith I knew had let me down."

Early Analysis

"Western culture promotes materialism at the expense of the spiritual. It pretends to have liberated women and the western media frowns upon Islam as oppressive to female rights. However, I struggles to fit into this culture. At the age of sixteen I remember feeling alienated, unable to fully participate in the social and cultural environment....

I became extremely conscious of my appearance at all times, insecure about the shape of my body and the clothes I was wearing. So much pressure is placed on women in the west to conform to an impossible ideal of beauty that demands them to be thin, fit and wear provocative clothes. Women are not allowed to grow old and their bodies are for public scrutiny. Eating disorders (anorexia and bulimia nervosa) are very common. At the same time they have to have brilliant careers and be good partners to their husbands, boyfriends and children. Family values are weakening amongst the youth so that there is an increasing number of single parents...."

Finding A Muslim And Islam

"I was clever at school, alhamdulillah, and came to study German and Russian at Cambridge....I was more concerned with seeking emotional, spiritual as well as intellectual fulfillment. Yet, at this point I did not know Islam....Thus the difficulties I encountered in trying to belong to a culture which was alien to my nature, in trying to conform to the social expectations of women, prepared me for (acceptance of) Islam, since it is in the light of these personal struggles that I was first able to appreciate its true sense and beauty; how it is really a religion which accords with human nature at the deepest level....I met a Muslim who inspired me with her serenity, the light which seemed to somehow emanate from her whole being; the light of faith, deep and untroubled. I still had many insecurities about myself and was unable to find a way out from my troubles which often seemed to engulf me completely as often happens when people do not know God....This friend told me of Soorah Al-Ikhlaas:

Say: He is Allah the One and Only
Allah The Self-Sufficient Master Whom all creatures need
He does not have children, nor was He given birth to
And there is none co-equal or comparable unto Him

I became drawn to Islam, for this was of course what I already believed.... Alhamdulillah, the sisters in Cambridge welcomed me with their hearts and helped me to gain knowledge I needed to become a Muslim. After five months I knew that it was right and said the shahaadah....There is not a day when I do not thank Almighty for responding so completely, with such love and mercy to my needs. Alhamdulillah."

Allahu Akbar! This women is like so many others whom Allah has opened their hearts. Perhaps the non-Muslim reader of this will reflect. Read the next story of Sister Haneefah.

Sister Haneefah: Another Singer, A Different Tune, Yet The Same Song

"As a Christian convert to Islam I can only present my personal experience and reasons for rejecting the "freedom" that women claim to have in this (western European) society in favor of the only religion that truly liberates women by giving us a status and position which is completely unique when compared with that of our non-Muslim counterparts."

"Before coming to Islam I had strong feminist tendencies and recognized that where the woman was concerned, a lot of shuffling around had been going on...new 'women's issues' being raised without the previous ones being satisfactorily resolved. Like many women of my background I would accuse Islam of being a sexist religion, discriminating, oppressing and giving men the greater privileges. All this coming form a person who didn't even know Islam. One who had been blinded due to ignorance and had accepted this deliberately distorted definition of Islam."

The Quest For Truth Reaps Its Rewards

"However despite my criticisms of Islam, inwardly I wasn't satisfied with my own status as a woman in this society....There was clearly a great contradiction between what women are told in theory and what actually happens in practice....The more I pondered, greater emptiness I felt within. I was slowly beginning to reach a stage where my dissatisfaction with my status as a woman in this society, was really a reflection of my greater dissatisfaction with the society itself. Everything seemed to be degenerating backwards, despite all the claims that the 1990's was going to be the decade of success and prosperity. Something vital seemed to be missing from my life and nothing would fill this vacuum.

Being a Christian didn't do anything for me, and I began to question the validity of only remembering God one day a week - Sundays! As with many other Christians too, I had become disillusioned by the hypocrisy of the Church and I was becoming increasingly unhappy with the concept of the Trinity and the deification of Jesus ('alaihi salaam). Eventually, I began to look into Islam."

"I was surprised. What I read and learned taught me a lot about myself as a woman, and also about where the real oppression of women lies: in every other system and way of life outside Islam. Muslim women have been given their rights in every aspect of the religion with clear definitions of their role in society - as have men - with no injustices against either of them.... So having amended my misconceptions about the true status of women in Islam, I was now looking further. I wanted to find that thing which was going to fill the vacuum in my life.

My attention was drawn towards the beliefs and practices of Islam.... By this time I had begun to meet practicing Muslim women and how I felt so secure and welcome in their company! There was a sense of humility about them and I wanted to share in that.... Alhamdulillah, I accepted Islam willingly."

Living, Learning And Never Turning Back

"Through my reading, researching and attending lectures, I have come to know my Rabb. I have come closer to understanding some of His names and Attributes.... I can appreciate much more why the true Muslim scholars emphasize so strongly for Muslims to learn about Allah - His Asmaa wa Sifaat - before trying to reason with Allah's laws.

Unfortunate I would have been had I taken the stance that 'Islam gives the best deal to women' and made this the reason for embracing Islam, because then my faith would have been without a firm ground and sooner or later I would have come across some laws ordained by Allah that I couldn't logically/rationally understand or see the wisdom behind. [Islamic law never contradicts sound reason and rationale, however each individual may or may not have reached understanding of it. The writer is making clear that she learned that one cannot make Islam into what they percieve it should be, but should rather accept it as it is. - Ed.] Had I not studied the foundation of belief, namely Tawheed and looked at how Allah describes Himself in His Book, perhaps I would still be in darkness."

The Main Reason For Women Turning To Islam In A Muslim Woman's Own Words

"The reason why women why women are turning to Islam must certainly have something to do with the honor that Islam gives them and the equality with which it deals with people, not only in gender, but also in terms of race, nationality, class etc. However, the overriding reason why I and so many others like me were attracted to Islam was because Islam answered the most important question which I had ever asked: 'Why am I here on this earth?' So I crossed the divide and managed to see what lies on either side...Alhamdulillah I chose Islam."

Well said. And may Allah reward you and all those brave women like you and keep you strong and growing in the Deen, Ameen.

Source: Ad-Da'wah ilAllah - A Womens' Islamic Magazine
By the editors of Ad-Da'wah ilAllah

The Mindless Dating Game- Happiness or Heartbreak

2009-11-23T11:25:00.000-08:00

By: Fathima Asmal

Many unmarried people these days search for “love” in a series of premarital relationships, which far from yielding happiness, lead to nothing but spiritual degeneration, loss of self-respect, heartache and misery.

When the average girl reaches the age of ten or eleven, she - sometimes with the knowledge of her parents, sometimes without their knowledge - becomes engrossed in and obsessed with the teen romance novel: a blonde, blue-eyed girl, with a perfect size 10 figure, falls in love with the football hero of the school, a few complications on the way (nothing major, of course), but things end happily ever after. In these novels, girl and boy might hold hands, or there might even be a kiss, thrown in somewhere along the line.

By the time the impressionable reader of these novels reaches her teens, she is sick of these story lines... and is searching for more. And is most cases, “more” is usually available right there in her home, tucked away at the bottom of her mother’s cupboard, in the form of adult romance novels.

The holding hands, and the kissing has now made way for much more, as details of pre-marital passion, and the fulfilment thereof are graphically spelt out on these pages. The reader is told what the “perfect body” is supposed to look like, the notion that sexual intercourse before marriage is sweet and romantic seeps through these pages... the feelings of degradation, and the many possible consequences thereof are conveniently left out.

A fairy tale is a fairy tale, we tell ourselves, a book is a book...they have no implications on real life. Surely our daughters understand and accept this...

But we are deluding ourselves. These same “harmless” fairytales and books, have a detrimental effect on the thinking, lifestyles and attitudes of our children. The first “crush”/infatuation our daughters experience in relation to members of the opposite sex, is often linked to false perceptions about “dating,” perceptions to which a wide variety of factors contribute. And one of the main factors painting a sugar and candy image of pre-marital romances, are these shallow bits of reading material that our daughters are exposed to.

It is no strange co-incidence that girls grow up believing that a boyfriend is the key to happiness...after all they have barely started walking, when the stories of the poor ill-treated Cinderella, saved only by a dashing prince, and the beautiful Snow White woken up by a prince, and the doomed Rapunzel, saved from the tower by a dashing hero, are told to them.

When they read romance novels, this theory is further reinforced - for, in the classic teen romance novel, the girl without a boyfriend, or “sweet sixteen and never been kissed” is the poor laughing stock who doesn’t have a date to the prom. And on the pages of a typical adult romance novel, the heroine is always a successful, beautiful career woman, but, she feels, that "something” is lacking in her life... and that “something” is naturally a man.

It is improbable that the average teenager, would just read these books, and that there would be no impact on her mind. It is usually exactly the opposite: she wishes she was the person on the pages of the book, and transfers her fantasies to her real life. She might see someone at school, who is popular, and good-looking [i.e. the football hero], and so begins her first painful crush, which is accompanied of course, by sending him anonymous ‘Valentine’s Day' cards, or calling him and playing songs over the phone. Shaitaan has set his trap, and the temptation to sin heightens, and each time the temptation is given in to, the girl becomes more daring. By the time the boy asks her out, her self has gotten the better of her, and her head is so filled with the notions of how sweet holding hands before that first kiss must be, she cannot resist.

And so begins a “relationship.” But this has all the ingredients that a classic romance novel does not....for those candy-coated pages do not tell you about the heartbreak, the tears, the mood swings and the countless negative aspects that are the central to these relationships. Nor do not tell you about the degradation and the loss of self-respect with which people, especially women, emerge after these relationships.

For there is no peace, no tranquillity in such relationships. The daily cycle, the moods, everything about the individual is affected. There is a certain sort of darkness, a restlessness which fills the heart, and this restlessness affects the rest of the family too. For it is now that all the arguments with the parents start: “Why can’t I go out tonight? All my friends are going!”

And there are the mood swings and the fluctuating eating habits. If the phone doesn’t ring, then it’s a case of “I don’t feel like eating.” Then there is dishonesty... unable to tell her parents where she really wants to go, she makes the excuse of having to go to the library to study for tomorrow’s test.

The ending of each relationship is most often marked by a long periods of torture, in which the girl has to “get over” the boy. Everyday life becomes a misery...her marks drop, daily moods start to depend on the current state of her relationship with the boy and many girls, totally misled by Shaitaan, even make dua for a “reconciliation.” During this period the girl is ravaged by guilt, because deep down in her heart, she is aware that what she has done is haraam, and she also feels guilty about lying to her parents. If there was a physical aspect to her relationship, then these feelings of guilt are deeply accentuated and coupled with a total loss of self-respect.

In the worst possible scenario, which frequently happens, the girl, in an effort to improve her “self image,” may turn to various other habits such as smoking, clubbing, drinking and drugs, or she may embark on a series of flings just to make herself feel “special” again.

In short, the “relationships” so sweetly portrayed in romance novels, which speak only of chocolates, flowers and happiness, end right there: on the pages of the novel. In real life, such relationships lead to nothing but unhappiness and heartache. For how can there be any real happiness in a “love” inspired by Shaitaan? This type of “love,” far from being pure and sacred, falls into the category of fornication.

Regarding fornication, Allah Ta’ala says in the Holy Qur’aan:

“The woman and man guilty of adultery of fornication, flog each of them with a hundred stripes: let not compassion move you in their case, in a matter prescribed by Allah, if ye believe in Allah and the Last Day: And let a party of the Believers witness their punishment.” [Surah An-Nur: 2]

How can there be any long term happiness in a sin for which the punishment prescribed is so severe? However, while keeping in mind the above injunction, we should also not despair of the Mercy of Allah Ta’ala... for we cannot even comprehend the vastness of Allah's Mercy.

We need to realise and tell ourselves that there is only temporary satisfaction of the nafs in a pre-marital relationship, and we need to terminate any such relationship which we might be involved in, and sincerely make taubah (repentance) to Allah. As difficult as it might be to end such relationships, once we realise and acknowledge to ourselves that the novels which we are exposed from such an early age are totally based on a kafir (disbelieving) way of life, which appears to be very appealing from the outside, but which bears no contentment and no real happiness, it will Insha'Allah, be easy to do so.

In addition to painting a rosy picture of dating, these books also create a very wrong concept of what the ideal partner should be like. It is obvious that since they are kafir publications, there is no stress on piety, good akhlaaq, honesty and all the other qualities people should be searching for in a potential marriage partner. Instead these books promote superficial thinking, with all their emphasis on good looks, perfect 10 figures, star football players, flashy cars, etc.

Parents should closely monitor the reading material which their children bring home and should teach their children about the beauty of marriage. We should realise, that while it is natural to be embarrassed to discuss such aspects of Islam with them, it is infinitely better for them that we impart the correct knowledge of an Islamic way of life to them, than to allow them to acquire the totally wrong concept of love from books, television, movies, and their friends and environment.

It should be explained to each teenager that the pre-marital relationships, the engagements, etc to which we attach such a great deal of importance in this world have nothing but a negative bearing on our lives in the hereafter. It should be instilled into their minds that pre-marital relationships are a sin, while marriage is an ibaadah (worship).

Allah Ta’ala has created men and women with natural desires, and He has created marriage as an institution in which these desires maybe fulfilled. A marriage in which both, husband and wife are striving to fulfill their obligations to Allah Ta’ala, such a marriage will be filled with the mutual respect, love and inevitably, the contentment, which we hopelessly search for in pre-marital relationships. Within the sacred context of a marriage, in which both parties are obedient to Allah Ta’ala, and adhere to His Commandments, there can be no room for the loss of respect, feelings of degradation, etc. which goes hand-in-hand with “going out” with or “dating” someone.

We should always bear in mind that should we die in the company of a boyfriend or a girlfriend or even a fiancé, we will be leaving this world having spent our last few moments of this life in the company of a non-Mahram, and perhaps in the commission of a sin against Allah and against ourselves.

***

(islamway.com)

How a Pearl Protects Itself.

2009-11-21T09:40:00.000-08:00

A Khutbah for the Muslim Women

By Muhammad Al-Shareef

When news of the Christian army that had prepared on the horizons to wipe out Islam reached him, Abu Qudaamah Ash-Shaamee moved quickly to the Mimbar of the Masjid. In a powerful and emotional speech, Abu Qudaamah ignited the desire of the community to defend their land, Jihad for the sake of Allah. As he left the Masjid, walking down a dark and secluded alley, a woman stopped him and said, "As salamu alaykum wa Rahmatullaah!" Abu Qudaamah stopped and did not answer. She repeated her salam again, adding "this is not how pious people should act." She stepped forward from the shadows. "I heard you in the Masjid encouraging the believers to go for Jihad and all I have is this." She handed him two long braids. "It can be used for a horse rein. Perhaps Allah may write me as one of those who went for Jihaad."

The next day as that Muslim village set out to confront the crusader army, a young boy ran through the gathering and stood at the hooves of Abu Qudaamah's horse. "I ask you by Allah to allow me to join the army." Some of the elder fighters laughed at the boy. "The horses will trample you," they said.

But Abu Qudaamah looked down into his eyes as he asked again, "I ask you by Allah, let me join." Abu Qudaamah then said, "On one condition: if you are killed you will take me with you to Jannah amongst those you will be allowed to intercede for." That young boy smiled. "It's a promise."

When the two armies met and the fighting intensified, the young boy on the back of Abu Qudaamah's horse asked, "I ask you by Allah to give me 3 arrows."
"You'll lose them!" said Abu Qudaamah.
The boy repeated, "I ask you by Allah to give me them." Abu Qudaamah gave him the arrows and the boy took aim.

"Bismillaah!" The arrow flew and killed a Roman. "Bismillaah!" The second arrow flew, killing a second Roman. "Bismillaah!" The third arrow flew, killing a third Roman. An arrow then struck the boy in the chest - knocking him off the horse. Abu Qudaamah jumped down to his side, reminding the boy in his final breaths, "Don't forget the promise!" The boy reached into his pocket, extracted a pouch and said, "Please return this to my mother."
"Who's your mother?" asked Abu Qudaamah.
"The woman that gave you the braids yesterday."

Think about this Muslimah. How did she reach this level of Taqwa where she would sacrifice her hair when today other women do the same to imitate Kafir icons, and her son when other women would die so long as their son stayed home. Indeed, she spent her life in the obedience of Allah, and when exam time came, she passed. Not only did she pass herself, but her children shone with that same beauty of Iman, children that she herself raised.

Very often - and perhaps in our times when we have forgotten much of the Sunnah - the lectures, khutbahs, and talks are all directed to the Muslim men. We forget that from the hady - guidance and way - of Rasul Allah - sal Allahu alayhi wa sallam - was that he would allocate a specific day of the week to teach the women. Women would come up to him in Hajj, in the street, even in his home and ask him questions about the Deen. At the Eid Salah, after addressing the men, he would take Bilal and go to the women's section and address the women.

Allah revealed an entire Surah by the name of Surah An-Nisa - the Women. And another by the name of - Maryam. And a third by the name of al Mujaadalah - the women who pleads. It is in enlivening this Sunnah that today this speech shall be addressed to the believing women, al-Mu'minaat.

Dear Sister, Dear Mother, Dear Daughter. Everyone is looking for happiness and fun, and I am sure you are not excluded. Where is that happiness and fun though? And where and when do you want that happiness? Do you want happiness, do you want to have `fun' in this life at the expense of the hereafter? Or is it in the hereafter, when you meet Allah that you want to be happy?

Every where you go you shall find a swarm of people and media and culture swearing to you that happiness is the happiness of the Dunya. Is it really happiness though? On the day of Repayment, Allah shall take the most `happiest' kafir of the Dunya and dip him in Jahannam - Hellfire. Then he shall ask him, "Have you ever seen any happiness?" The Kafir will say, "Never!"

Nay, the happiness is only the happiness of the hereafter no matter what happens in this Dunya. Allah shall bring on the Day of Repayment the most tested human and dip him in Jannah - Paradise. He shall then ask him, "Have you ever seen sadness?" And that person shall say, "Never!"

And don't think that this happiness and fun is exclusive to the hereafter. It is very much tied to this life as well. Listen and understand the words of Allah:

Whoever works righteousness, whether male or female, while he (or she) is a true believer verily to him We will give a good life (in this world with respect, contentment and lawful provision), and We shall pay them certainly a reward in proportion to the best of what they used to do (i.e. Paradise in the Hereafter). - Surah AnNahl (16/97)

Dear Sister, you have to understand that you or anyone may enter Hellfire! By Allah, we are not better than Fatimah, the daughter of Rasul Allah - sal Allahu alayhi wa sallam. And he said to her, "O Fatimah the daughter of Muhammad, Ask me whatever you wish from my wealth, for I shall avail you nothing to Allah." Meaning that it doesn't matter if you're my daughter, if you don't work for Jannah, saying to Allah that my father is so and so will not help you in anyway.

Islam is filled with many Mu'minahs that completed their Taqwa of Allah. When the other girls put up posters of kafir singers and kafir athletes and kafir actresses, you should put up posters in your heart of Fatimah and many other Mu'minahs.

Aasiyah, the wife of Fir'own. Her Eeman in Allah thrived under the shadow of someone that said, "I am your Lord, Most High!" When news reached Fir'own of his wife's Eeman he beat her and commanded his guards to beat her. They took her out in the scalding noon heat, tied her hands and feet and beat her perpetually. Who did she turn to? She turned to Allah! She prayed, "My lord, build for me a home with you in Paradise and save me from Fir'own and his deeds and save me from the transgressive people."

It was narrated that when she said this, the sky opened for her and she saw her home in Paradise. She smiled. The guards watched astonished - she's being tortured and she smiles? Frustrated, Fir'own commanded a boulder to be brought and dropped on Aasiyah, to crush her to death. But Allah took her soul before the boulder was brought and she became an example for all the believing men and women till the end of time:

[And Allah has set forth an example for those who believe: the wife of Fir'own (Pharaoh) - when she said, "My Lord, Build for me a home with You in Paradise, and save me from Fir'own and his deeds, and save me from the transgressive-disbelieving people.] -Tahreem 66/11

When we talk about Jihad and Shuhadaa' - martyrs - do you know who the first Muslim in Islam to be killed in the path of Allah was? It was Summayah, the mother of Ammar. When Abu Jahl heard of her Islam and her husband Yaasir and her son Ammar, he whipped them all and beat them. So much so, that Rasul Allah would pass by them as they went through this test of their Iman and would say to them, "Be patient O family of Yaasir, for you have a date set (when you shall enter) Jannah!"

As Abu Jahl beat Sumayyah one day, she refused to recant her Deen, something that enraged Abu Jahl. He took a spear as she lay on the burning sand,looking up to the sky, and he speared her through her midsection. She was the first of her family and the entire Ummah to meet Allah as a Martyr.

Dear Sister, our role models come from the Quran. You may have heard the story of the boy and the king. When the entire village became Muslim by the death of that young boy, the king ordered that an enormous fire be kindled and that all those who would not recant their religion be burnt alive. A Mu'minah, stood with her baby over the fire. She looked at her baby, and seeking her child's weakness and innocence, she considered turning her back. The baby said to her, "What are you waiting for mother. Go forward for you are on the truth!" She nodded. Then with her baby in hand she was pushed to her death.

[And they ill-treated them for no other reason than that they believed in Allah, Exalted in Power, Worthy of all Praise!- * Him to Whom belongs the dominion of the heavens and the earth! And Allah is Witness to all things.]. - Surah AlBuruj, 8,9

And dear sister, your role models come to you from today. As her son tells us, a senior women in a Muslim land decided that all the vanity that normally happens in the gatherings of women was not for her. She turned to Salah and praying at night, and in her old age, she found herself calling to her son one night from her prayer room. He son says, "I came in and she was in Sajda saying that she was paralysed!" Her son took her to the doctors and she began a cycle of rehabilitation, but there was little hope. She then commanded her son to take her back home, take her back to her prayer room, take her back to that Sajdah.

As she prayed to Allah in her sajdah, the night came when she called to her son. "Astawdi'ukallaah alladhee laa yadee'u wa daa'i'uh - I leave you in the trust of Allah, and whenever something is left in Allah's trust it is never lost." She passed away in her sajdah. Her muscles froze in that position and so they had to wash her body as she was in Sajdah. The prayed Janazah for her as her body was in sajdah. The carried her to the grave yard as her body was in Sajdah. They buried her as she was in Sajdah.

And the Prophet said that we shall all be resurrected on what we died on, she shall be resurrected on the day of judgement in Sajdah to Allah - Jalla Jalaaluhu wa taqaddasat asmaa'uhu - because that it how she lived and died.

***Part II***

There are many other stories that we know about of powerful believing mothers, wives and sisters and many, many that Allah only knows about. Whenever a halaqah is going on, the Muslim women outnumber the men. At the American Open University, (www.open-university.edu) the overwhelming majority of students are Muslim women. Go to an Islamic teachers/schools conference, attend a lecture and you shall see the mismatch of sisters to brothers. Sometimes it is sad to see all these brothers lacking the motivation that many Muslimahs have. But if there is a beautiful sign in all this, it is that - in sha' Allah ta'ala - those sisters are going to raise an army of believing men and women in the coming generation. WAllahu akbar!

When Imam Ahmad was still young, his father died. He would tell his students of the work his mother went through in raising him, and he would pray for her. In the cold Baghdad nights, she would wake long before him to warm the water so that her son Ahmad could make wudu for Fajr. Then she would wrap him in blankets, herself cloaked in her Jilbaab, and guide him through the dark, cold alleys to reach the main Masjid, long before Fajr so that her son could get a good seat in class. Her son Ahmad - at that age in grade 2 or 3 - would sit all day long studying Quran and Sunnah, and she would wait for him to finish so that she could drop him home safely. At the age of 16, she prepared money and food for him and told him, "Travel for your search of knowledge." He left for Makkah and Madinah and many other places and met many great scholars. She raised Ahmad to become one of the four greatest Imams in Islam.

Dear sister, after all this, ask a non-Muslim what it is that he wants from you? Does he want you to be liberated? Liberated from what? From Allah and his Messenger? From the Quran and the Sunnah? From Jannah? From this deen that Allah chose for you?

And what is he going to give you in return? Happinness? By Allah, he does not own any happiness to give. Is he going to give you love and protection from punishment in the grave and from the gatekeepers of hellfire and from death? Why is it that they want to liberate young beautiful women? Why don't they liberate the seniors? Why don't they liberate the indigenous? Why don't they liberate the inmates? Why is their target audience a young and skinny and tall women (their definition of beauty) between the age of 13 - 28? And why is their first call for you to take off your Hijab?

Remember that friend - if you consider him so - carefully, for - without any doubt, by Allah - he shall be your bitterest enemy on the day of Repayment:

[Friends on that day will be foes, one to another - except the Righteous] - Surah Zukhruf (43/67)

One Kafirah summed up exactly what they think of women, "It's not who you are, it's what you wear and what you look like!"

And listen to Fabian, a french `model' (of what?), as she spit on the fashion industry. "Fashion houses made me into a mannequin, a wooden idol. The mission: to manipulate hearts and alter minds. I learnt how to be worthless, nothing on the inside, cold. We lived in a world of filth in all that filth means."

When the Prophet - sal Allahu alayhi wa sallam - stood on the plain of Arafah and gave his farewell speech he said to the Ummah, "Treat the women kindly!" History records that in Europe in the same year, at the same time that Islam was saying this, the Christian clergy were arguing whether a women was a human or an animal! Those clergymen are the ancestors of the Kuffar that now want to `liberate' you.

There is much more than can be said. I shall conclude with the advice of Rasul Allah - sal Allahu alayhi wa sallam - to every Muslim mother, daughter, and wife: "If the women prays her five (Salah), fasts her month (of Ramadan), protects herself (from committing Zina), and listens to her husband, it will be said to her, `from any door you wish, enter Paradise!"

Sister, that is where you want to be.

[O ye who believe! give your response to Allah and His Messenger, when He calls you to that which shall give you life; and know that Allah cometh between a man and his heart, and that it is He to Whom ye shall (all) be gathered.] - Surah Anfal 8/24

Allah and His Messenger are calling you to life. Dear sister, reply!

Evidence that tattooing, plucking the eyebrows and filling the teeth is haraam.

2009-11-18T11:09:00.000-08:00

What is the Islamic ruling on women reducing their eyebrows? Please quote the specific ahaadeeth if possible.

Praise be to Allaah.

Firstly:
Allaah has forbidden women to remove any part of the hair of their eyebrows; this action is called al-namas in Arabic, and it is haraam because of the following evidence:

1 – Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):
“They (all those who worship others than Allaah) invoke nothing but female deities besides Him (Allaah), and they invoke nothing but Shaytaan (Satan), a persistent rebel!
Allaah cursed him. And he [Shaytaan (Satan)] said: ‘I will take an appointed portion of your slaves.
Verily, I will mislead them, and surely, I will arouse in them false desires; and certainly, I will order them to slit the ears of cattle, and indeed I will order them to change the nature created by Allaah.’ And whoever takes Shaytaan (Satan) as a Wali (protector or helper) instead of Allaah, has surely, suffered a manifest loss”
[al-Nisa’ 4:117-119]

The relevant point in this verse is that Iblees will tell people to change the creation of Allaah. Some of the mufassireen interpreted it by saying that what is meant here in this verse is tattooing, plucking the eyebrows and filing the teeth, as we shall see below.

Al-Qurtubi said in his commentary on this verse:
A group said what was meant by changing the creation of Allaah was tattooing and other things that are done for the purpose of beautification. This was stated by Ibn Mas’ood and al-Hasan.
Tafseer al-Qurtubi, 5/392

2 – It was narrated that ‘Abd-Allaah said: “Allaah has cursed the women who do tattoos and those who ask for tattoos to be done, those who ask for their eyebrows to be plucked, and the women ask for their teeth to be filed for the purpose of beautification, changing the creation of Allaah.” A woman from the tribe of Bani Asad whose name was Umm Ya’qoob heard of that and she came and said, “I have heard that you have cursed So and so and So and so.” He said, “Why should I not curse those whom the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) cursed and who are mentioned in the Book of Allaah?’ She said, “I have read what is between the two covers [of the Qur’aan], and I did not find anything in it like what you have said.” He said, “If you have read it, have you not read that Allaah says,
‘And whatsoever the Messenger (Muhammad) gives you, take it; and whatsoever he forbids you, abstain (from it)’
[al-Hashr 59:7]?”

She said, “Of course.” He said, “He forbade that.” She said, “I think your wife does it.” He said, “Go and look.” So she went and looked and she did not see what she was looking for. He said, “If she had been like that, she would not be with us.”
Narrated by al-Bukhaari, 4604; Muslim, 2125
Al-Qurtubi said concerning the meaning of tattooing:
Tattooing is done on the hand; it involves piercing the back of the hand with a needle and filling it with kohl or another substance so that it changes colour. [Translator’s note: this refers to the type of tattooing known at that time]
Tafseer al-Qurtubi, 5/392.

Ibn Hajar said concerning the meaning of plucking the eyebrows:
The mutanammisah is the one who asks another to pluck her eyebrows, and the naamisah is the one who does it. Al-nimaas means removing the hair of the face with tweezers. It was said that the word nimaas refers specifically to removing hair from the eyebrows in order to reduce them or make them straight. Abu Dawood said in al-Sunan: al-naamisah is the one who plucks the eyebrows in order to reduce them.
Fath al-Baari, 10/377

It was said concerning the meaning of those who ask for their teeth to be filed (al-mutafallijaat)
This refers to one who asks for her teeth to be filed or who does that. Falj means making a gap between two teeth and tafalluj means making a gap between two attached things by means of filing or the like. This was usually done to the incisor and the eyetooth for the purpose of beautification. A woman might do this if her teeth were close together so that she would have gaps between her teeth, or an old woman might have do to make it look as if she were younger, because young women usually have gaps between their teeth that disappear as the woman gets older.
Fath al-Baari, 10/372

Al-Qurtubi said:
With regard to all of these matters, the ahaadeeth indicate that those who do them are cursed and that they are major sins. But there is some difference of scholarly opinion concerning the reason why they are forbidden. It was said that it is because it is a kind of deception, or because it is changing the creation of Allaah, as Ibn Mas’ood said. This is more correct, and it also includes the first meaning. And it was said that what is prohibited is what is permanent, because it is changing the creation of Allaah; with regard to what is not permanent, such as kohl and make-up, the scholars have permitted that.

Tafseer al-Qurtubi, 5/393.
See also question no. 13744.

Islam Q&A

Some misconceptions about women in Islam (Part 2)

2009-11-14T12:20:00.000-08:00

Divorce

Islam considers marriage a basis for the Islamic family, since it develops bonds of love and caring and a secure atmosphere for the growth and progress of the human race. This, in turn, produces a sound society. This is why the Prophet taught us in a narration, that although classified ‘weak’, has a valid and important meaning. He said: "The most detestable of all lawful things in the sight of Allaah is divorce."However, this does not mean that divorce is prohibited. On the contrary, it can sometimes be the best alternative. Divorce is a right for both women and men if their problems cannot be solved. Two French legislators, Planoil and Ripert, have said: "Divorce is a mischief. However, it is a measure that cannot be avoided for the welfare of the community, because it is the only remedy for another harm which may be more dangerous, i.e. murder."

The above statement applies to cases where the husband and wife have lost their love for each other and where harmony in the marriage is over. Indeed, any other alternative will make them unhappy and will affect their children in the long run.

In these cases, Islam advises the couple to try to reconcile their differences in the presence of some immediate relatives belonging to both sides. If they are unable to do so, they are instructed to seek counseling through a third party, such as friends or other relatives. If there is still no solution, then they should seek a solution through a judge.

The judge will advise the couple to be patient and think of the children. However, if the problem remains unsolved, the family life becomes unbearable and the children are affected, then divorce becomes the only alternative, to enable them to have other spouses.

When it is inescapable, divorce is neither harmful to men nor to women. It is also definitely not unjust to women.
First, the couple must seek divorce in an amicable way. They are instructed to separate without hard feelings towards each other. They should keep a minimum of understanding that will secure the children's situation after the divorce.

The Quran says (what means): "Divorce is twice. Then [after that], either keep [her] in an acceptable manner or release [her] with good treatment. And it is not lawful for you to take anything of what you have given them unless both fear that they will not be able to keep [within] the limits of Allaah, and then there is no blame upon either of them concerning that by which she ransoms herself. These are the limits of Allaah, so do not transgress them. And whoever transgresses the limits of Allaah -- it is those who are the wrongdoers [i.e. the unjust]." [Quran 2: 229]

In Islam, the woman is not neglected after the divorce. Indeed husbands are instructed to provide housing to the divorced wife until her waiting period is completed, as in the saying of Allaah (which means): "Lodge them (During their waiting period (referring to wives whose divorce has been pronounced) [in a section] of where you dwell out of your means and do not harm them in order to oppress them (so that they would be forced to leave or to ransom themselves). And if they should be pregnant, then spend on them until they give birth. And if they breastfeed for you, then give them their payment and confer among yourselves in the acceptable way; but if you are in discord, then there may breastfeed for him [i.e. the father] another woman." [Quran: 65:6]

Finally, although it is true that only men are allowed to pronounce divorce, yet a woman has the right to ask for a divorce, which is called ‘Khul’. In this case, she has to return the dowry given by the husband, so that he utters the divorce.

Attestations

In Islam, one male witness equals two females: The Quran says (what means): "And get two witnesses out of your men. If there are not two men, then a man and two women such as you choose [maybe in place of two men as the witnesses]; so that if one of the women errs, the other one will remind her..." [Quran 2:282]

Here again, many people tend to denounce Islamic principles as unjust to women. They tend to interpret this requirement as proof of men's superiority over women. Again, this assumption is not true. In fact, various psychological and biological studies conducted on the psyche and hormonal functions of women, have proved that men generally tend to react more rationally and less emotionally, than women.

In cases of crime, for example, torn bodies and pouring blood are more likely to spur an emotional reaction among women than among men. This reaction is alone capable of distorting the female's perception and/or memory.

On the other hand, men are also bound by rules concerning their testimony. For instance, they must not be parents, friends or enemies of the accused. Can we then conclude that, if it was the case for women, that male parents and friends of the accused must be considered inferior too? Of course, they are not.

Finally, one should note that there are matters where a woman is the only witness required. These are related to areas where women are the experts, for example, in issues of breast feeding, bringing up children and the question of kinship (who is her child's father).

The Veil

How many times have you seen an educated veiled woman, working and acting normally on television ? Very, very rarely. On the other hand, how many times have you seen a veiled woman being hit by her husband, in tears or fighting and rioting along with fundamentalists?

Just think: What does a black 'Hijaab' veil evoke in your mind? Certainly not the image it is meant to evoke -- religious commitment and peaceful, deep-rooted faith. How many times have you seen a veiled young girl and said: "Haraam! Poor thing! She has not seen the world yet..." Is all this just a coincidence?

Veiled women today are either associated with alienation or fundamentalism. They are either looked upon with pity or fear. Have people ever asked the question: Where is the woman's will to surrender to God in this? Where is her choice of protecting her dearest possession, her body?

When Islam ordered women to wear the veil, it did it to privilege her, not constrain her:

The Quran says (what means): "O Prophet! Tell your wives and your daughters and the women of the believers to draw upon them their over-garments. That is more appropriate so that they may be recognized and not molested." [Quran 33: 59]

The above verses show that Islam aims to protect women from being considered sexual objects. It instructs women to uncover their faces in front of their husband, close relatives whom she cannot marry (Mahaarim) and other women. In front of strangers, she must conceal everything but her face and hands.

Why does one need to show a semi-clad woman in a car's advertisement? Why do we not see a veiled woman? In the first case, because the advertisers are trying to sell the image of the woman with the car. Unconsciously, you buy the car wishing it will provide you with such a "babe." In the second case, the woman has refused to be treated as an object for trade and has worn the veil, a sign of dignity rather than humiliation.

Summarized from: What Does She Expect Better? By: IIPH
(www.islamweb.net)

Some misconceptions about women in Islam. (Part 1)

2009-11-14T12:03:00.000-08:00

Islam gave women rights and privileges at a time when only barbaric manners and values dominated.
Yet, some people argue that Islam has alienated women in some domains. In fact, this belief is a misconception. People who say so, may have read about it in a magazine or seen it on TV. A quick examination of the issues judged as unjust to women will certainly correct the misunderstanding.

Man as the head of the household:

Some people believe that a woman in Islam is regarded as inferior to man since the Quran says (what means):
"Men have one degree above women." [Quran 2: 228]

In fact, to understand this Quranic verse, you should see another one, related to the issue in question. It reveals the wisdom behind this concept.

In the Quran it also says (what means): "Men are the protectors and maintainers of women, because Allaah has given the one more than the other and because men support them from their means." [Quran 4:34]

This verse implies that it is a man's duty to support his wife, and not the reverse, but this, in no way, makes him superior to her.

In fact, the rights and responsibilities of a woman are equal to those of a man but they are not necessarily identical. Since men and women are not created identical, they have different physical and emotional qualities, jobs and privileges. This does not mean that women are inferior.

On the contrary, women are considered crucial members of society in Islam since they are assigned the job of bringing up future generations. People today tend to look down at housewives but, in fact, raising children is one of the most important and difficult tasks. The way a mother brings up her child determines the way he will behave in the future. This duty, which requires patience, love, understanding and wisdom was significantly assigned to women in Islam because her nature suits this job.

Allaah The Exalted, in His Wisdom, has assigned a role for each member of the family so that there would be no arguments concerning who should do what. If a sailboat has two leaders, each will want to follow a path, leading ultimately to chaos and even a crash. In the same manner, how many times have your parents fought over some decision because each had their own point of view and wanted to apply it? This is precisely why it is preferable to have one leader for each household. However, this does not give the leader the right to be a dictator, or to neglect the role of his companion. This does not make him superior to other members of his family. It just gives him a larger duty.

Inheritance:

Some people claim that Islam is unjust towards women because it entitles them to inherit half of what men get. In fact, those people only know one side of the truth.

First, the principle of women inheriting half the money is only applicable in 45 percent of the cases. In the other 55 percent, women inherit the same amount or sometimes even more. For example, a mother and a father each inherit the sixth of their son's property when they are not the only inheritors.

In addition, the laws of inheritance in Islam are proportional to the duties of spending. Indeed, a man in Islam has the responsibility of supporting his family, his brother's children (when his brother dies), his parents (when they retire and do not have an income), his children from his previous marriage (if he has them) and his household, including his wife and children. A woman, on the other hand, does not bear this responsibility. She has the freedom to use the money she collects from her dowry or work as she pleases.

You might object here, saying that women today are working and helping their husbands pay the expenses, which entitles them to share equality with men. In fact, you should know that women's economic assistance to their husbands, which has become the norm today, is only an answer to the females’ wishes. Islam does not oblige women to spend on their households. It is a free choice many women have themselves taken today to feel more liberated, so it does not entitle them to a bigger portion of the inheritance.

Polygyny:

Polygyny is one of the most questioned principles that Islam grants men and women. Indeed, many people wrongfully accuse Islam of injustice because it allows a man to have up to four wives. Nevertheless, like every instruction in the Quran, polygyny has a reason. You see, Islam is a practical religion that acknowledges the needs and temptations of human beings and provides laws that deal with them, thus preserving harmony and morality.

Polygyny might be the solution for a couple if the wife is barren, the husband wants children of his own and the option of separation does not appeal to both parties.

If a woman is chronically ill and is unable to perform her marital duties. Polygyny may also be the solution when the couple does not want divorce.

Polygyny is the religion's answer to cases where some men have excessive sexual needs that cannot be fulfilled by one wife. This in no way means that men should abuse this right and use it whenever they fancy a woman. It is rather a chance Islam has provided to prevent men from committing adultery. Many people who condemn polygyny cheat on their wives, calling this phenomenon a 'swift affair.' Islam, at least, has offered the second woman the option of being called 'a wife' rather than 'a mistress', especially in some countries where women remarkably outnumber men.

Polygyny may settle the problem of an increased number of unmarried women, especially during wars.

However, polygyny has some limits and conditions to be met. Indeed, the Quran instructs the man to be fair with his wives on all levels, including treatment, money, house, etc. The only level where the man may have an uneven stance is the level of the feelings that he cannot control:

The Quran says (what means): "You will never be able to do perfect justice between wives even if it is your ardent desire, so do not incline too much to one of them [by giving her more of your time and provision] so as to leave the other hanging [i.e. neither divorced nor married]. And if you do justice, and do all that is right and fear Allaah by keeping away from all that is wrong, then Allaah is Ever-Forgiving and All-Merciful." [Quran 4:129]

Finally, it is worth knowing that Islam gives a woman the right to refuse polygyny for her husband by setting it as a condition during the marriage procedures. If this condition is set, then the woman is granted divorce if her husband marries another while he is still married to her.

You might ask, why could not there be polyandry (a woman having more than one husband)? The answer is simple. Islam did not allow it because Allaah is All-Aware that it will create a problem of kinship. This means that the child may not know who is actually his father (it could be anyone of the four husbands). In addition to the psychological damage it may cause, this problem also complicates the issue of inheritance. Even birds and animals do not allow polyandry.

(to be contd)

A study advising American women to follow the example of the Muslim women.

2009-11-11T11:29:00.000-08:00

A study that was conducted by Harvard University (USA) advised women in the United States to follow the example of Muslim women in terms of their morals and chastity so as to eliminate moral disintegration and the serious diseases that are plaguing the United States and western societies.

Harvard University (one of the oldest and most prestigious universities in the US) conducted this study for an association specialized in the diseases that are caused by immorality. This was a comparative study of the rate of sexually transmitted diseases among Muslim women and western women. According to this study, AIDS represents nothing more than a possession that haunts Muslim societies when one of the family members travels abroad. Nevertheless, if such a person adheres to the teachings of Islam, he will return home safely, without being infected by this disease.

Within the Muslim community itself, people live in ultimate peace and do not fear these diseases as society enjoys internal social stability and total abstention from immorality. Moreover, Muslim women adhere to the teachings and morals of their religion; hence, there is no possible way for having a sexual relationship outside marriage.

The study added that the rate of sexually transmitted diseases like AIDS in Islamic societies does not exceed 0.5 per thousand people and that these societies are absolutely immune to these diseases because of the religious and moral commitment of Muslim women. The same thing applies to all other sexually transmitted diseases that only invade the societies that do not abide by moral limits.

The US study showed that the researches related to the rate of sexually transmitted diseases in Muslim communities in the West proved that Muslim families that abide by the teachings of Islam do not suffer from any of these diseases. Moreover, these families enjoy a state of social stability that enables them to achieve financial and social progress. On the other hand, the study revealed that Muslim families in these communities which do not abide by these morals suffer from many of the problems from which Western society suffers.

The study stated that the chastity of the Muslim woman and her adherence to Hijaab are considered among the most important reasons for the social stability enjoyed by Muslim societies. It also called on all American women to try to imitate Muslim women in their attitudes and the way they maintain their chastity, considering this the only way to save American society from collapse because of the moral disintegration and the diseases that are caused by illicit relationships.

It is important to mention that this is not the first study that was conducted by Harvard University, which acknowledges that Islam has introduced concepts and principles for the benefit of humanity. Recently, the Faculty of Medicine at the same university carried out a research that confirmed that leprosy does not infect a Muslim person who performs his prayers at their proper time. The study explained that lukewarm water is the only remedy for this disease; therefore, leprosy never infects the Muslim who preserves his prayers and performs ablution five times a day.

Harvard University was not the only university to acknowledge the greatness of Islam and its rituals. The National Institute for Health Care Researches in Maryland conducted a special study about Islam and its rituals. This study proved that a Muslim who preserves the Islamic rituals is psychologically and physically healthy, leads his life with superb psychological purity and suffers no psychological crises. On the contrary, a non-Muslim or a Muslim who does not observe the Islamic rituals does not have any of these benefits.

Additionally, some scientists in the state of Maryland examined 126 thousand people including religious and irreligious Muslims as well as non-Muslims.

The study revealed that the religious Muslims enjoy a truly sound social life. Moreover, the scientific medical examination proved that the immunity of a religious Muslim person is stronger than that of other people by 10-15%. In addition, it was proved that a Muslim who performs his religious duties is less vulnerable to sudden heart attack.

(www.islamweb.net)

Women's rights in islam.

2009-11-09T11:18:00.000-08:00

Praise be to Allaah.

Islam honours women greatly. It honours women as mothers who must be respected, obeyed and treated with kindness. Pleasing one's mother is regarded as part of pleasing Allaah. Islam tells us that Paradise lies at the mother’s feet, i.e. that the best way to reach Paradise is through one's mother. And Islam forbids disobeying one’s mother or making her angry, even by saying a mild word of disrespect. The mother’s rights are greater than those of the father, and the duty to take care of her grows greater as the mother grows older and weaker. All of that is mentioned in many texts of the Qur'aan and Sunnah.

For example, Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):

“And We have enjoined on man to be dutiful and kind to his parents”

[al-Ahqaaf 46:15]

“And your Lord has decreed that you worship none but Him. And that you be dutiful to your parents. If one of them or both of them attain old age in your life, say not to them a word of disrespect, nor shout at them but address them in terms of honour.

24. And lower unto them the wing of submission and humility through mercy, and say: ‘My Lord! Bestow on them Your Mercy as they did bring me up when I was young’”

[al-Isra’ 17:23, 24]

Ibn Maajah (2781) narrated that Mu’aawiyah ibn Jaahimiah al-Sulami (may Allaah be pleased with him) said: I came to the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) and said: O Messenger of Allaah, I want to go for jihad with you, seeking thereby the Face of Allaah and the Hereafter. He said, “Woe to you! Is your mother still alive?” I said, Yes. He said, “Go back and honour her.” Then I approached him from the other side and said: O Messenger of Allaah, I want to go for jihad with you, seeking thereby the Face of Allaah and the Hereafter. He said, “Woe to you! Is your mother still alive?” I said, Yes. He said, “Go back and honour her.” Then I approached him from in front and said, O Messenger of Allaah, I want to go for jihad with you, seeking thereby the Face of Allaah and the Hereafter. He said, “Woe to you! Is your mother still alive?” I said, Yes. He said, “Go back and honour her (lit. stay by her feet), for there is Paradise.”

Classed as saheeh by al-Albaani in Saheeh Sunan Ibn Maajah. It was also narrated by al-Nasaa’i with the words: “Stay with her for Paradise is beneath her feet.”

Al-Bukhaari (5971) and Muslim (2548) narrated that Abu Hurayrah (may Allaah be pleased with him) said: A man came to the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) and said: “O Messenger of Allaah, who is most deserving of my good company?” He said: “Your mother.” He said: “Then who?” He said: “Your mother.” He said: “Then who?” He said: “Your mother.” He said: “Then who?” He said: “Then your father.”

And there are other texts which we do not have room to mention here.

One of the rights which Islam gives to the mother is that her son should spend on her if she needs that support, so long as he is able and can afford it. Hence for many centuries it was unheard of among the people of Islam for a mother to be left in an old-people’s home or for a son to kick her out of the house, or for her sons to refuse to spend on her, or for her to need to work in order to eat and drink if her sons were present.

Islam also honours women as wives. Islam urges the husband to treat his wife in a good and kind manner, and says that the wife has rights over the husband like his rights over her, except that he has a degree over her, because of his responsibility of spending and taking care of the family’s affairs. Islam states that the best of the Muslim men is the one who treats his wife in the best manner, and the man is forbidden to take his wife’s money without her consent. Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):

“and live with them honourably”

[al-Nisa’ 4:19]

“And they (women) have rights (over their husbands as regards living expenses) similar (to those of their husbands) over them (as regards obedience and respect) to what is reasonable, but men have a degree (of responsibility) over them. And Allaah is All-Mighty, All-Wise”

[al-Baqarah 2:228]

And the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “I urge you to treat women well.” Narrated by al-Bukhaari, 331; Muslim, 1468.

And the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “The best of you is the one who is best to his wife, and I am the best of you to my wives.” Narrated by al-Tirmidhi, 3895; Ibn Maajah, 1977; classed as saheeh by al-Albaani in Saheeh al-Tirmidhi.

And Islam honours women as daughters, and encourages us to raise them well and educate them. Islam states that raising daughters will bring a great reward. For example, the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “Whoever takes care of two girls until they reach adulthood, he and I will come like this on the Day of Resurrection,” and he held his fingers together. Narrated by Muslim, 2631.

Ibn Maajah (3669) narrated that ‘Uqbah ibn ‘Aamir (may Allaah be pleased with him) said: I heard the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) say: “Whoever has three daughters and is patient towards them, and feeds them, gives them to drink and clothes them from his riches, they will be a shield for him from the Fire on the Day of Resurrection.” Classed as saheeh by al-Albaani in Saheeh Ibn Maajah.

Islam honours woman as sisters and as aunts. Islam enjoins upholding the ties of kinship and forbids severing those ties in many texts. The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “O people! Spread (the greeting of) salaam, offer food (to the needy), uphold the ties of kinship, and pray at night when people are sleeping, and you will enter Paradise in peace.” Narrated by Ibn Maajah, 3251; classed as saheeh by al-Albaani in Saheeh Ibn Maajah.

Al-Bukhaari (5988) narrated that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “Allaah, may He be exalted, said to the ties of kinship: ‘Whoever upholds you, I will support him, and whoever breaks you, I will cut him off.’”

All of these qualities may co-exist in a single woman: she may be a wife, a daughter, a mother, a sister, an aunt, so she may be honoured in all these ways.

To conclude: Islam raised the status of women, and made them equal with men in most rulings. So women, like men, are commanded to believe in Allaah and to worship Him. And women are made equal to men in terms of reward in the Hereafter. Women have the right to express themselves, to give sincere advice, to enjoin what is good and forbid what is evil, and to call people to Allaah. Women have the right to own property, to buy and sell, to inherit, to give charity and to give gifts. It is not permissible for anyone to take a woman’s wealth without her consent. Women have the right to a decent life, without facing aggression or being wronged. Women have the right to be educated; in fact it is obligatory to teach them what they need to know about their religion.

Anyone who compares the rights of women in Islam with their situation during the Jaahiliyyah or in other civilizations will understand that what we are saying is true. In fact we are certain that women are given the greatest honour in Islam.

There is no need for us to mention the situation of women in Greek, Persian or Jewish society, but even Christian societies had a bad attitude towards women. The theologians even gathered at the Council of Macon to discuss whether woman was merely a body or a body with a soul. They thought it most likely that women did not have a soul that could be saved, and they made an exception only in the case of Mary (Maryam – peace be upon her).

The French held a conference in 586 CE to discuss whether women had souls or not, and if they had souls, were these souls animal or human? In the end, they decided that they were human! But they were created to serve men only.

During the time of Henry VIII, the English Parliament issued a decree forbidding women to read the New Testament because they were regarded as impure.

Until 1805, English law allowed a man to sell his wife, and set a wife’s price at six pennies.

In the modern age, women were kicked out of the house at the age of eighteen so that they could start working to earn a bite to eat. If a woman wanted to stay in the house, she had to pay her parents rent for her room and pay for her food and laundry.

See ‘Awdat al-Hijaab, 2/47-56.

How can this compare to Islam which enjoins honouring and kind treatment of women, and spending on them?

Secondly:

With regard to the changes in these rights throughout the ages, the basic principles have not changed, but with regard to the application of these principles, there can be no doubt that during the golden age of Islam, the Muslims applied the sharee’ah of their Lord more, and the rulings of this sharee’ah include honouring one’s mother and treating one’s wife, daughter, sister and women in general in a kind manner. The weaker religious commitment grew, the more these rights were neglected, but until the Day of Resurrection there will continue to be a group who adheres to their religion and applies the sharee’ah of their Lord. These are the people who honour women the most and grant them their rights.

Despite the weakness of religious commitment among many Muslims nowadays, women still enjoy a high status, whether as daughters, wives or sisters, whilst we acknowledge that there are shortcomings, wrongdoing and neglect of women’s rights among some people, but each one will be answerable for himself.

Islam Q&A

Why I Shed Bikini for Niqab: The New Symbol of Women's Liberation

2009-11-08T11:24:00.000-08:00

I am an American woman who was born in the midst of America's "Heartland." I grew up, just like any other girl, being fixated with the glamour of life in "the big city." Eventually, I moved to Florida and on to South Beach of Miami, a hotspot for those seeking the "glamorous life." Naturally, I did what most average Western girls do. I focused on my appearance and appeal, basing my self-worth on how much attention I got from others. I worked out religiously and became a personal trainer, acquired an upscale waterfront residence, became a regular "exhibiting" beach-goer and was able to attain a "living-in-style" kind of life.

Years went by, only to realize that my scale of self-fulfillment and happiness slid down the more I progressed in my "feminine appeal." I was a slave to fashion. I was a hostage to my looks.

As the gap continued to progressively widen between my self-fulfillment and lifestyle, I sought refuge in escapes from alcohol and parties to meditation, activism, and alternative religions, only to have the little gap widen to what seemed like a valley. I eventually realized it all was merely a pain killer rather than an effective remedy.

By now it was September 11, 2001. As I witnessed the ensuing barrage on Islam, Islamic values and culture, and the infamous declaration of the "new crusade," I started to notice something called Islam. Up until that point, all I had associated with Islam was women covered in "tents," wife beaters, harems, and a world of terrorism.

As a feminist libertarian, and an activist who was pursuing a better world for all, my path crossed with that of another activist who was already at the lead of indiscriminately furthering causes of reform and justice for all. I joined in the ongoing campaigns of my new mentor which included, at the time, election reform and civil rights, among others. Now my new activism was fundamentally different. Instead of "selectively" advocating justice only to some, I learned that ideals such as justice, freedom, and respect are meant to be and are essentially universal, and that own good and common good are not in conflict. For the first time, I knew what "all people are created equal" really means. But most importantly, I learned that it only takes faith to see the world as one and to see the unity in creation.

One day I came across a book that is negatively stereotyped in the West--The Holy Qur'an. I was first attracted by the style and approach of the Qur'an, and then intrigued by its outlook on existence, life, creation, and the relationship between Creator and creation. I found the Qur'an to be a very insightful address to heart and soul without the need for an interpreter or pastor.

Eventually I hit a moment of truth: my new-found self-fulfilling activism was nothing more than merely embracing a faith called Islam where I could live in peace as a "functional" Muslim.

I bought a beautiful long gown and head cover resembling the Muslim woman's dress code and I walked down the same streets and neighborhoods where only days earlier I had walked in my shorts, bikini, or "elegant" western business attire. Although the people, the faces, and the shops were all the same, one thing was remarkably distinct--I was not--nor was the peace at being a woman I experienced for the very first time. I felt as if the chains had been broken and I was finally free. I was delighted with the new looks of wonder on people's faces in place of the looks of a hunter watching his prey I had once sought. Suddenly a weight had been lifted off my shoulders. I no longer spent all my time consumed with shopping, makeup, getting my hair done, and working out. Finally, I was free.

Of all places, I found my Islam at the heart of what some call "the most scandalous place on earth," which makes it all the more dear and special.

While content with Hijab I became curious about Niqab, seeing an increasing number of Muslim women in it. I asked my Muslim husband, whom I married after I reverted to Islam, whether I should wear Niqab or just settle for the Hijab I was already wearing. My husband simply advised me that he believes Hijab is mandatory in Islam while Niqab is not. At the time, my Hijab consisted of head scarf that covered all my hair except for my face, and a loose long black gown called "Abaya" that covered all my body from neck to toe.

A year-and-a-half passed, and I told my husband I wanted to wear Niqab. My reason, this time, was that I felt it would be more pleasing to Allah, the Creator, increasing my feeling of peace at being more modest. He supported my decision and took me to buy an "Isdaal," a loose black gown that covers from head to toe, and Niqab, which covers all my head and face except for my eyes.

Soon enough, news started breaking about politicians, Vatican clergymen, libertarians, and so-called human rights and freedom activists condemning Hijab at times, and Niqab at others as being oppressive to women, an obstacle to social integration, and more recently, as an Egyptian official called it--"a sign of backwardness."

I find it to be a blatant hypocrisy when Western governments and so-called human rights groups rush to defend woman's rights when some governments impose a certain dress code on women, yet such "freedom fighters" look the other way when women are being deprived of their rights, work, and education just because they choose to exercise their right to wear Niqab or Hijab. Today, women in Hijab or Niqab are being increasingly barred from work and education not only under totalitarian regimes such as in Tunisia, Morocco, and Egypt, but also in Western democracies such as France, Holland, and Britain.

Today I am still a feminist, but a Muslim feminist, who calls on Muslim women to assume their responsibilities in providing all the support they can for their husbands to be good Muslims. To raise their children as upright Muslims so they may be beacons of light for all humanity once again. To enjoin good--any good--and to forbid evil--any evil. To speak righteousness and to speak up against all ills. To fight for our right to wear Niqab or Hijab and to please our Creator whichever way we chose. But just as importantly to carry our experience with Niqab or Hijab to fellow women who may never have had the chance to understand what wearing Niqab or Hijab means to us and why do we, so dearly, embrace it.

Most of the women I know wearing Niqab are Western reverts, some of whom are not even married. Others wear Niqab without full support of either family or surroundings. What we all have in common is that it is the personal choice of each and every one of us, which none of us is willing to surrender. Willingly or unwillingly, women are bombarded with styles of "dressing-in-little-to-nothing" virtually in every means of communication everywhere in the world. As an ex non-Muslim, I insist on women's right to equally know about Hijab, its virtues, and the peace and happiness it brings to a woman's life as it did to mine. Yesterday, the bikini was the symbol of my liberty, when in actuality it only liberated me from my spirituality and true value as a respectable human being.

I couldn't be happier to shed my bikini in South Beach and the "glamorous" Western lifestyle to live in peace with my Creator and enjoy living among fellow humans as a worthy person. It is why I choose to wear Niqab, and why I will die defending my inalienable right to wear it. Today, Niqab is the new symbol of woman's liberation.

To women who surrender to the ugly stereotype against the Islamic modesty of Hijab, I say: You don't know what you are missing.

(By Sara Bokker.She is a former actress/model/fitness instructor and activist. Currently, Sara is Director of Communications at "The March For Justice," a co-founder of "The Global Sisters Network," and producer of the infamous "Shock & Awe Gallery.")

Why Hijaab?

2009-11-07T10:40:00.000-08:00

Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):

“O Prophet! Tell your wives and your daughters and the women of the believers to draw their cloaks (veils) all over their bodies (i.e. screen themselves completely except the eyes or one eye to see the way). That will be better, that they should be known (as free respectable women) so as not to be annoyed. And Allaah is Ever Oft‑Forgiving, Most Merciful”

[al-Ahzaab 33:59]

Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):

“And tell the believing women to lower their gaze (from looking at forbidden things), and protect their private parts (from illegal sexual acts) and not to show off their adornment except only that which is apparent (like both eyes for necessity to see the way, or outer palms of hands or one eye or dress like veil, gloves, headcover, apron), and to draw their veils all over Juyoobihinna (i.e. their bodies, faces, necks and bosoms) and not to reveal their adornment except to their husbands, or their fathers, or their husband’s fathers, or their sons, or their husband’s sons, or their brothers or their brother’s sons, or their sister’s sons, or their (Muslim) women (i.e. their sisters in Islam), or the (female) slaves whom their right hands possess, or old male servants who lack vigour, or small children who have no sense of feminine sex. And let them not stamp their feet so as to reveal what they hide of their adornment. And all of you beg Allaah to forgive you all, O believers, that you may be successful”

[al-Noor 24:31]

Precious White Pearls.

2009-11-03T13:08:00.000-08:00

Precious White Pearls.
(Umm Amathullah )

Islam describes women as Precious White Pearls. The Quran asks both men and women to perform in equal measure, the duty of enjoining good and forbidding evil.

Allah SWA says: “And I have never created the jinn and the mankind, except to worship Me” (Surat Al-Dhaariyaat: 56)

Allah SWA says: “The believers, men and women are protectors of one another, they enjoin what is just and forbid what is evil, they observe regular prayers, practice regular charity and obey Allah and His Messenger. On them Allah will pour His Mercy, for Allah is exalted in power, Wise” (Surat At-Taubah 9:71)

A woman will be either a mother or a wife or a daughter. When comparing to men there are much more verses and hadiths (than men) representing kind treatment to women.

In Islam, the value and importance of women in the society and the true measure of their success as human beings, is measured with a completely different criteria: their fear of Allah and obedience to Him, and fulfillment of the duties He has entrusted them with, particularly that of bearing, rearing and teaching children.

The Muslim mother has a great feeling of security about the type of care and consideration she can expect from her children. Thankfulness to parents is linked with thankfulness to Allah, and good conduct begins at home with one’s closest relatives.

Nabi SAW said: “Verily, Allah forbade for you rudeness (disobedience) to mothers” (Narrated by Tirimidhi: 1165)

“A man came to Nabi SAW and said: ‘O Messenger of Allah! Who is more entitled to be treated with the best companionship by me?’ The Prophet SAW replied: ‘Your Mother”, the man then asked: “Then who?”, Nabi SAW replied: ‘Then your mother”, the man then asked: “Then who?”, Nabi SAW replied: ‘Then your mother”, the man then asked: “Then who?”, Nabi SAW replied: ‘Then your Father’.” (Reported by Bukhari & Muslim)

It is clearly mentioned that women were created for men. A wife is also regarded as a source of love, peace and compassion, as stated in the Quran:

Allah SWA says: “And among His signs is this, that He created for you mates from among yourselves, that ye may dwell in tranquility with them and He has put love and mercy between your (hearts): Verily in that are signs for those who reflect” (Surat Al-Rum 30:21)

It is narrated from Nabi SAW that: “The world is full of Pleasures, and most pleasant thing (which a person can get) is a Pious Wife” (Reported by Muslim, Nasaai, Ibn-Maajah, Ahmed and Ibn Hibbaan)

A woman takes precedence in the responsibilities of the husband, family and other house works. Men are ordered to treat them kindly and to look after them kindly by clothing and feeding them according to his standards.

With this regard Allah SWA says: “Men are the protectors and maintainers of women, because Allah has given more (strength) than the other, and because they support them from their means. Therefore the righteous women are devoutly obedient, and guard in (the husband’s) absence what Allah would have them guard…” (Surat An-Nisa 4: 34)

The Prophet SAW said; “The wife is a guardian and is responsible for her husband’s house and offsprings” (Narrated by Bukhari: 5188)

And also Allah SWA says: “… They (wives) are your garments and you (husbands) are their garments…” (Surat Al-Bagharah: 2: 187)

The Prophet Muhammad SAW also emphasized the importance of this compassionate treatment: “I command you to treat women kindly. Women has been created from a rib (the rib is crooked), and the most crooked part of the rib is in the upper region. If you try to make it straight you will break it, and if you leave it as it is, it will remain curved. So treat women kindly” (Reported by Bukhari: 5185)

It is narrated that Nabi SAW said: “The believers with perfect faith are those who have the best disposition and the best of you are those who are best to their wives” (Tirmidhi)

In another Hadith Nabi SAW said: “The best of you are, those who are best to the women” (Sahih Al-Jami’ Al-Sagheer)

Islam highly values girls (daughters) and strictly forbids casting aspersions to them.

In this regard Prophet SAW said: “Do not hate girls. They are comforting and very precious” (Ahmed)

Islam also enjoins upon Muslims to provide good education and training to their daughters and see them well settled in marriage with a fine match and continue a fair and just treatment even after marriage.

Allah SWA says in the Quran: “Allah will raise up to (suitable) ranks (and degrees), those of you believe and who have been granted knowledge” (Surat Al-Mujadhalah 58:11)

And also says: “Are those equal, those who know and those who do not know?” (Surat Az-Zumar: 39:09)

It is narrated from Abu Huraira RA that Rasuluh Allah SAW said: “Whoever follows a way to seek knowledge, Allah will make easy for him a way to Paradise” (Muslim & Trimidi)

It is also narrated that Nabi SAW said: “Acquiring knowledge is compulsory for every Muslim man and women” (At-Tabarani)

The Prophet SAW said: “Whomever nourishes three daughters, educates and trains them, gets them married (and afterwards) offers a gentle behaviour to them, has his place reserved in heaven” (Haakim)

We should remember that a married Muslim women has so many responsibilities in her hand as a wife and mother. This prevents them from completely engaging (spending all her time) in studies, like men or unmarried sisters do.

And also one of the important things which we have to know is that, their studying environment should be an Islamic environment, which means there shouldn't be any unlawful things in the environment which they study or the things which they study, like free mixing and so on. If such conditions are fulfilled then in Islam, nothing prevents them from gaining knowledge.

Also Islam does not prohibit women from working outside the home. But they should meet the conditions of the Islamic Shari’a. Their working environment should be a suitable environment for them. Her job should not be one which forces her to mix and associate with men. She should seek employment in positions which require women’s special skills, or which relate to the needs of women and children, such as teaching, nursing other women, midwifery, medicine with specialisations like pediatrics or obstetrics-gynecology. Her employment should not come before or seriously interfere with her responsibilities which are obligatory upon her as wife and mother.

As a conclusion I say, I am proud to be a dutiful muslim woman and I am satisfied with it with full submission. Verily it is the teachings of Islam that brought tranquility to my heart. Even if the whole world is against it, I will strive my best to stand firm on this path, in sha Allah. My dear sisters, Wake up! Do not wait until it is too late.