To A Non-Muslim Woman.

When you look at me
All that you see
is the scarf that covers my hair
My words you can't hear
because you're too full of fear,
mouth gaping, all you do is stare.

You think it's not my choice
in your own "liberation" you rejoice.
You think I'm uneducated,
trapped, oppressed and subjugated,
You're so thankful that you're free.

But non-Muslim woman you've got it wrong:
You're the weak and I'm the strong.
For I've rejected the trap of man:
Fancy clothes - low neck, short skirt,
those are devices for pain and hurt.
I'm not falling for that little plan.

I'm a person with ideas and thought.
I'm not for sale, I can't be bought.
I'm me - not a fancy toy,
I won't decorate anyone's arm,
nor be promoted for my charm.
There is more to be than playing coy.

Living life as a balancing game - mother,
daughter, wife, nurse, cleaner, cook, lover
and still bring home a wage.
Who thought up this modern "freedom"?
Where man can love 'em and man can leave 'em.
This is not free, but life in a cage.
Always jumping to a male agenda
competing on his terms.
No job share, no creche facilities,
no feeding and nappy changing amenities
No time off for menstrual pain,
"hormones," they laugh, "what a shame!"
No equal pay for equal skill;
your job they can always fill.
No promotion unless you're sterilised.
No promotion unless you're sexually terrorised.
And this is liberation?

Non-Muslim woman you can have your life.
Mine - it has less strife.
I cover and I get respected,
surely that's to be expected,
for I won't demean the feminine,
I won't live to male criterion,
I dance to my own tune
and I hope you see this very soon.
For your own sake - wake up and use your sight.
Are you so sure that you are right?


****





From Jannah.org

Why Women Are Coming to Islam.

There are many stories of conversions to the deen of Allah. Many are very touching and poignant and serve us as a reminder that Allah guides who he wills often in ways and in circumstances we would never imagine. We would like to highlight in this article that among the most inspiring and illustrative of the fact that a pure heart and intention is rewarded with guidance, are those stories of our Muslim sisters who have accepted Islam.

Considering the intense anti-Islamic and hostile media propaganda these past few years, some with a particularly strong emphasis on the 'supposed' degrading position of women in Islam, we feel that those women are exceptional who accept Islam and who were able to separate the negative stereotyping and nonsense from the reality of faith.

Women are most clearly the signposts of Islam and whether we Muslim men like it or not, we are often judged by the perception people have of just how we treat our women. Muslim women stand out more so than men when they fully practice their religion, one reason obviously being their observance of Islamic dress or hijaab that covers and obscures the shape of their bodies completely and in many cases the face as well. However, what most people are not aware of is what is 'beyond the veil' (to borrow a title from one of the plethora of anti-Islamic books on Muslim women).

Seeing Through The Fog

Muslim women, especially converts, are by no means the empty-headed, submissive, rejects of western society that some essays and articles written by so-called journalists and researchers would have us believe. Most of those non-Muslim writers in many cases just seek to find the sensational or even make it up to sell books or papers or to serve their own preset agendas or to validate their own philosophical or ideological positions. They usually fail miserably to understand or relate the true underlying reasons for so many Muslim women's acceptance of and strict adherence to Islam.

It is this writer's opinion that much of what is written by such people, especially the women amongst them, stems from their inability to face the reality of the true motivations of intelligent, thoughtful, western women, both young and old, for accepting Islam. It would be an indictment of the shortcomings within their own culture and lifestyles and perhaps force even their own personal revaluation which often involves the type of critical examination that most people simply choose to avoid. Biased, slanted, and incomplete reporting is often due to plain old ignorance and significant doses of arrogance and pride.

The acceptance of Islam by women has mostly nothing to do with mere rejection of cultural tradition, men, or economics so much as it does with a sincere search for the truth motivated by a strong desire to serve Allah properly. It becomes clear to the thoughtful, truth seeking woman that what western society and culture (or eastern for that matter), even at its highest levels has to offer, is a far cry from what they, and all women, need. Namely, true freedom from the oppression of men and the tyranny of religion. Spiritual fulfillment and right guidance and living that leads to real happiness and satisfaction as well as true success in this life and the life to come is what they seek. Only real Islam offers this.

We present the true stories of two such thoughtful women to serve us all as a reminder of the substance of this great deen and the kind of consideration each and every person should give to his or her role and purpose in life and their relationship with Allah. Some editing has been done only for the sake of space and minor grammatical corrections.

Background Of A European Catholic Girl

"As a child I believed in God. My family was Christian (Catholic). After the death of my mother ... we did not often go to church but Christian values were a part of my upbringing. I had a strong faith in God. At school we were taught that Jesus ('alaihi salaam) was the son of God who came down to earth to save us from our sins. For some reason, alhamdulillah, I never took these stories seriously. I believed of course in Jesus ('alaihi salaam) but not really as the son of God. Christians pray to Jesus ('alaihi salaam): I prayed only to God....

As a teenager I questioned my faith for the first time. I wanted spiritual fulfillment for I did not feel at ease in the culture I was growing up in. However, I always felt disappointed when I went to churches. I could not accept the words in the hymns and prayers that spoke of father God and a son Jesus. The church failed to touch my heart and so I turned away from religion altogether as many western people have done....For many years I was then lost and confused. Christianity, being the only faith I knew had let me down."

Early Analysis

"Western culture promotes materialism at the expense of the spiritual. It pretends to have liberated women and the western media frowns upon Islam as oppressive to female rights. However, I struggles to fit into this culture. At the age of sixteen I remember feeling alienated, unable to fully participate in the social and cultural environment....

I became extremely conscious of my appearance at all times, insecure about the shape of my body and the clothes I was wearing. So much pressure is placed on women in the west to conform to an impossible ideal of beauty that demands them to be thin, fit and wear provocative clothes. Women are not allowed to grow old and their bodies are for public scrutiny. Eating disorders (anorexia and bulimia nervosa) are very common. At the same time they have to have brilliant careers and be good partners to their husbands, boyfriends and children. Family values are weakening amongst the youth so that there is an increasing number of single parents...."

Finding A Muslim And Islam

"I was clever at school, alhamdulillah, and came to study German and Russian at Cambridge....I was more concerned with seeking emotional, spiritual as well as intellectual fulfillment. Yet, at this point I did not know Islam....Thus the difficulties I encountered in trying to belong to a culture which was alien to my nature, in trying to conform to the social expectations of women, prepared me for (acceptance of) Islam, since it is in the light of these personal struggles that I was first able to appreciate its true sense and beauty; how it is really a religion which accords with human nature at the deepest level....I met a Muslim who inspired me with her serenity, the light which seemed to somehow emanate from her whole being; the light of faith, deep and untroubled. I still had many insecurities about myself and was unable to find a way out from my troubles which often seemed to engulf me completely as often happens when people do not know God....This friend told me of Soorah Al-Ikhlaas:

Say: He is Allah the One and Only
Allah The Self-Sufficient Master Whom all creatures need
He does not have children, nor was He given birth to
And there is none co-equal or comparable unto Him

I became drawn to Islam, for this was of course what I already believed.... Alhamdulillah, the sisters in Cambridge welcomed me with their hearts and helped me to gain knowledge I needed to become a Muslim. After five months I knew that it was right and said the shahaadah....There is not a day when I do not thank Almighty for responding so completely, with such love and mercy to my needs. Alhamdulillah."

Allahu Akbar! This women is like so many others whom Allah has opened their hearts. Perhaps the non-Muslim reader of this will reflect. Read the next story of Sister Haneefah.


Sister Haneefah: Another Singer, A Different Tune, Yet The Same Song

"As a Christian convert to Islam I can only present my personal experience and reasons for rejecting the "freedom" that women claim to have in this (western European) society in favor of the only religion that truly liberates women by giving us a status and position which is completely unique when compared with that of our non-Muslim counterparts."

"Before coming to Islam I had strong feminist tendencies and recognized that where the woman was concerned, a lot of shuffling around had been going on...new 'women's issues' being raised without the previous ones being satisfactorily resolved. Like many women of my background I would accuse Islam of being a sexist religion, discriminating, oppressing and giving men the greater privileges. All this coming form a person who didn't even know Islam. One who had been blinded due to ignorance and had accepted this deliberately distorted definition of Islam."

The Quest For Truth Reaps Its Rewards

"However despite my criticisms of Islam, inwardly I wasn't satisfied with my own status as a woman in this society....There was clearly a great contradiction between what women are told in theory and what actually happens in practice....The more I pondered, greater emptiness I felt within. I was slowly beginning to reach a stage where my dissatisfaction with my status as a woman in this society, was really a reflection of my greater dissatisfaction with the society itself. Everything seemed to be degenerating backwards, despite all the claims that the 1990's was going to be the decade of success and prosperity. Something vital seemed to be missing from my life and nothing would fill this vacuum.

Being a Christian didn't do anything for me, and I began to question the validity of only remembering God one day a week - Sundays! As with many other Christians too, I had become disillusioned by the hypocrisy of the Church and I was becoming increasingly unhappy with the concept of the Trinity and the deification of Jesus ('alaihi salaam). Eventually, I began to look into Islam."

"I was surprised. What I read and learned taught me a lot about myself as a woman, and also about where the real oppression of women lies: in every other system and way of life outside Islam. Muslim women have been given their rights in every aspect of the religion with clear definitions of their role in society - as have men - with no injustices against either of them.... So having amended my misconceptions about the true status of women in Islam, I was now looking further. I wanted to find that thing which was going to fill the vacuum in my life.

My attention was drawn towards the beliefs and practices of Islam.... By this time I had begun to meet practicing Muslim women and how I felt so secure and welcome in their company! There was a sense of humility about them and I wanted to share in that.... Alhamdulillah, I accepted Islam willingly."

Living, Learning And Never Turning Back

"Through my reading, researching and attending lectures, I have come to know my Rabb. I have come closer to understanding some of His names and Attributes.... I can appreciate much more why the true Muslim scholars emphasize so strongly for Muslims to learn about Allah - His Asmaa wa Sifaat - before trying to reason with Allah's laws.

Unfortunate I would have been had I taken the stance that 'Islam gives the best deal to women' and made this the reason for embracing Islam, because then my faith would have been without a firm ground and sooner or later I would have come across some laws ordained by Allah that I couldn't logically/rationally understand or see the wisdom behind. [Islamic law never contradicts sound reason and rationale, however each individual may or may not have reached understanding of it. The writer is making clear that she learned that one cannot make Islam into what they percieve it should be, but should rather accept it as it is. - Ed.] Had I not studied the foundation of belief, namely Tawheed and looked at how Allah describes Himself in His Book, perhaps I would still be in darkness."

The Main Reason For Women Turning To Islam In A Muslim Woman's Own Words

"The reason why women why women are turning to Islam must certainly have something to do with the honor that Islam gives them and the equality with which it deals with people, not only in gender, but also in terms of race, nationality, class etc. However, the overriding reason why I and so many others like me were attracted to Islam was because Islam answered the most important question which I had ever asked: 'Why am I here on this earth?' So I crossed the divide and managed to see what lies on either side...Alhamdulillah I chose Islam."

Well said. And may Allah reward you and all those brave women like you and keep you strong and growing in the Deen, Ameen.


Source: Ad-Da'wah ilAllah - A Womens' Islamic Magazine
By the editors of Ad-Da'wah ilAllah

The Mindless Dating Game- Happiness or Heartbreak

By: Fathima Asmal


Many unmarried people these days search for “love” in a series of premarital relationships, which far from yielding happiness, lead to nothing but spiritual degeneration, loss of self-respect, heartache and misery.

When the average girl reaches the age of ten or eleven, she - sometimes with the knowledge of her parents, sometimes without their knowledge - becomes engrossed in and obsessed with the teen romance novel: a blonde, blue-eyed girl, with a perfect size 10 figure, falls in love with the football hero of the school, a few complications on the way (nothing major, of course), but things end happily ever after. In these novels, girl and boy might hold hands, or there might even be a kiss, thrown in somewhere along the line.

By the time the impressionable reader of these novels reaches her teens, she is sick of these story lines... and is searching for more. And is most cases, “more” is usually available right there in her home, tucked away at the bottom of her mother’s cupboard, in the form of adult romance novels.

The holding hands, and the kissing has now made way for much more, as details of pre-marital passion, and the fulfilment thereof are graphically spelt out on these pages. The reader is told what the “perfect body” is supposed to look like, the notion that sexual intercourse before marriage is sweet and romantic seeps through these pages... the feelings of degradation, and the many possible consequences thereof are conveniently left out.

A fairy tale is a fairy tale, we tell ourselves, a book is a book...they have no implications on real life. Surely our daughters understand and accept this...

But we are deluding ourselves. These same “harmless” fairytales and books, have a detrimental effect on the thinking, lifestyles and attitudes of our children. The first “crush”/infatuation our daughters experience in relation to members of the opposite sex, is often linked to false perceptions about “dating,” perceptions to which a wide variety of factors contribute. And one of the main factors painting a sugar and candy image of pre-marital romances, are these shallow bits of reading material that our daughters are exposed to.

It is no strange co-incidence that girls grow up believing that a boyfriend is the key to happiness...after all they have barely started walking, when the stories of the poor ill-treated Cinderella, saved only by a dashing prince, and the beautiful Snow White woken up by a prince, and the doomed Rapunzel, saved from the tower by a dashing hero, are told to them.

When they read romance novels, this theory is further reinforced - for, in the classic teen romance novel, the girl without a boyfriend, or “sweet sixteen and never been kissed” is the poor laughing stock who doesn’t have a date to the prom. And on the pages of a typical adult romance novel, the heroine is always a successful, beautiful career woman, but, she feels, that "something” is lacking in her life... and that “something” is naturally a man.

It is improbable that the average teenager, would just read these books, and that there would be no impact on her mind. It is usually exactly the opposite: she wishes she was the person on the pages of the book, and transfers her fantasies to her real life. She might see someone at school, who is popular, and good-looking [i.e. the football hero], and so begins her first painful crush, which is accompanied of course, by sending him anonymous ‘Valentine’s Day' cards, or calling him and playing songs over the phone. Shaitaan has set his trap, and the temptation to sin heightens, and each time the temptation is given in to, the girl becomes more daring. By the time the boy asks her out, her self has gotten the better of her, and her head is so filled with the notions of how sweet holding hands before that first kiss must be, she cannot resist.

And so begins a “relationship.” But this has all the ingredients that a classic romance novel does not....for those candy-coated pages do not tell you about the heartbreak, the tears, the mood swings and the countless negative aspects that are the central to these relationships. Nor do not tell you about the degradation and the loss of self-respect with which people, especially women, emerge after these relationships.

For there is no peace, no tranquillity in such relationships. The daily cycle, the moods, everything about the individual is affected. There is a certain sort of darkness, a restlessness which fills the heart, and this restlessness affects the rest of the family too. For it is now that all the arguments with the parents start: “Why can’t I go out tonight? All my friends are going!”

And there are the mood swings and the fluctuating eating habits. If the phone doesn’t ring, then it’s a case of “I don’t feel like eating.” Then there is dishonesty... unable to tell her parents where she really wants to go, she makes the excuse of having to go to the library to study for tomorrow’s test.

The ending of each relationship is most often marked by a long periods of torture, in which the girl has to “get over” the boy. Everyday life becomes a misery...her marks drop, daily moods start to depend on the current state of her relationship with the boy and many girls, totally misled by Shaitaan, even make dua for a “reconciliation.” During this period the girl is ravaged by guilt, because deep down in her heart, she is aware that what she has done is haraam, and she also feels guilty about lying to her parents. If there was a physical aspect to her relationship, then these feelings of guilt are deeply accentuated and coupled with a total loss of self-respect.

In the worst possible scenario, which frequently happens, the girl, in an effort to improve her “self image,” may turn to various other habits such as smoking, clubbing, drinking and drugs, or she may embark on a series of flings just to make herself feel “special” again.

In short, the “relationships” so sweetly portrayed in romance novels, which speak only of chocolates, flowers and happiness, end right there: on the pages of the novel. In real life, such relationships lead to nothing but unhappiness and heartache. For how can there be any real happiness in a “love” inspired by Shaitaan? This type of “love,” far from being pure and sacred, falls into the category of fornication.

Regarding fornication, Allah Ta’ala says in the Holy Qur’aan:

“The woman and man guilty of adultery of fornication, flog each of them with a hundred stripes: let not compassion move you in their case, in a matter prescribed by Allah, if ye believe in Allah and the Last Day: And let a party of the Believers witness their punishment.” [Surah An-Nur: 2]

How can there be any long term happiness in a sin for which the punishment prescribed is so severe? However, while keeping in mind the above injunction, we should also not despair of the Mercy of Allah Ta’ala... for we cannot even comprehend the vastness of Allah's Mercy.

We need to realise and tell ourselves that there is only temporary satisfaction of the nafs in a pre-marital relationship, and we need to terminate any such relationship which we might be involved in, and sincerely make taubah (repentance) to Allah. As difficult as it might be to end such relationships, once we realise and acknowledge to ourselves that the novels which we are exposed from such an early age are totally based on a kafir (disbelieving) way of life, which appears to be very appealing from the outside, but which bears no contentment and no real happiness, it will Insha'Allah, be easy to do so.

In addition to painting a rosy picture of dating, these books also create a very wrong concept of what the ideal partner should be like. It is obvious that since they are kafir publications, there is no stress on piety, good akhlaaq, honesty and all the other qualities people should be searching for in a potential marriage partner. Instead these books promote superficial thinking, with all their emphasis on good looks, perfect 10 figures, star football players, flashy cars, etc.

Parents should closely monitor the reading material which their children bring home and should teach their children about the beauty of marriage. We should realise, that while it is natural to be embarrassed to discuss such aspects of Islam with them, it is infinitely better for them that we impart the correct knowledge of an Islamic way of life to them, than to allow them to acquire the totally wrong concept of love from books, television, movies, and their friends and environment.

It should be explained to each teenager that the pre-marital relationships, the engagements, etc to which we attach such a great deal of importance in this world have nothing but a negative bearing on our lives in the hereafter. It should be instilled into their minds that pre-marital relationships are a sin, while marriage is an ibaadah (worship).

Allah Ta’ala has created men and women with natural desires, and He has created marriage as an institution in which these desires maybe fulfilled. A marriage in which both, husband and wife are striving to fulfill their obligations to Allah Ta’ala, such a marriage will be filled with the mutual respect, love and inevitably, the contentment, which we hopelessly search for in pre-marital relationships. Within the sacred context of a marriage, in which both parties are obedient to Allah Ta’ala, and adhere to His Commandments, there can be no room for the loss of respect, feelings of degradation, etc. which goes hand-in-hand with “going out” with or “dating” someone.

We should always bear in mind that should we die in the company of a boyfriend or a girlfriend or even a fiancé, we will be leaving this world having spent our last few moments of this life in the company of a non-Mahram, and perhaps in the commission of a sin against Allah and against ourselves.

***


(islamway.com)

How a Pearl Protects Itself.

A Khutbah for the Muslim Women

By Muhammad Al-Shareef


When news of the Christian army that had prepared on the horizons to wipe out Islam reached him, Abu Qudaamah Ash-Shaamee moved quickly to the Mimbar of the Masjid. In a powerful and emotional speech, Abu Qudaamah ignited the desire of the community to defend their land, Jihad for the sake of Allah. As he left the Masjid, walking down a dark and secluded alley, a woman stopped him and said, "As salamu alaykum wa Rahmatullaah!" Abu Qudaamah stopped and did not answer. She repeated her salam again, adding "this is not how pious people should act." She stepped forward from the shadows. "I heard you in the Masjid encouraging the believers to go for Jihad and all I have is this." She handed him two long braids. "It can be used for a horse rein. Perhaps Allah may write me as one of those who went for Jihaad."

The next day as that Muslim village set out to confront the crusader army, a young boy ran through the gathering and stood at the hooves of Abu Qudaamah's horse. "I ask you by Allah to allow me to join the army." Some of the elder fighters laughed at the boy. "The horses will trample you," they said.

But Abu Qudaamah looked down into his eyes as he asked again, "I ask you by Allah, let me join." Abu Qudaamah then said, "On one condition: if you are killed you will take me with you to Jannah amongst those you will be allowed to intercede for." That young boy smiled. "It's a promise."

When the two armies met and the fighting intensified, the young boy on the back of Abu Qudaamah's horse asked, "I ask you by Allah to give me 3 arrows."
"You'll lose them!" said Abu Qudaamah.
The boy repeated, "I ask you by Allah to give me them." Abu Qudaamah gave him the arrows and the boy took aim.

"Bismillaah!" The arrow flew and killed a Roman. "Bismillaah!" The second arrow flew, killing a second Roman. "Bismillaah!" The third arrow flew, killing a third Roman. An arrow then struck the boy in the chest - knocking him off the horse. Abu Qudaamah jumped down to his side, reminding the boy in his final breaths, "Don't forget the promise!" The boy reached into his pocket, extracted a pouch and said, "Please return this to my mother."
"Who's your mother?" asked Abu Qudaamah.
"The woman that gave you the braids yesterday."

Think about this Muslimah. How did she reach this level of Taqwa where she would sacrifice her hair when today other women do the same to imitate Kafir icons, and her son when other women would die so long as their son stayed home. Indeed, she spent her life in the obedience of Allah, and when exam time came, she passed. Not only did she pass herself, but her children shone with that same beauty of Iman, children that she herself raised.

Very often - and perhaps in our times when we have forgotten much of the Sunnah - the lectures, khutbahs, and talks are all directed to the Muslim men. We forget that from the hady - guidance and way - of Rasul Allah - sal Allahu alayhi wa sallam - was that he would allocate a specific day of the week to teach the women. Women would come up to him in Hajj, in the street, even in his home and ask him questions about the Deen. At the Eid Salah, after addressing the men, he would take Bilal and go to the women's section and address the women.

Allah revealed an entire Surah by the name of Surah An-Nisa - the Women. And another by the name of - Maryam. And a third by the name of al Mujaadalah - the women who pleads. It is in enlivening this Sunnah that today this speech shall be addressed to the believing women, al-Mu'minaat.

Dear Sister, Dear Mother, Dear Daughter. Everyone is looking for happiness and fun, and I am sure you are not excluded. Where is that happiness and fun though? And where and when do you want that happiness? Do you want happiness, do you want to have `fun' in this life at the expense of the hereafter? Or is it in the hereafter, when you meet Allah that you want to be happy?

Every where you go you shall find a swarm of people and media and culture swearing to you that happiness is the happiness of the Dunya. Is it really happiness though? On the day of Repayment, Allah shall take the most `happiest' kafir of the Dunya and dip him in Jahannam - Hellfire. Then he shall ask him, "Have you ever seen any happiness?" The Kafir will say, "Never!"

Nay, the happiness is only the happiness of the hereafter no matter what happens in this Dunya. Allah shall bring on the Day of Repayment the most tested human and dip him in Jannah - Paradise. He shall then ask him, "Have you ever seen sadness?" And that person shall say, "Never!"

And don't think that this happiness and fun is exclusive to the hereafter. It is very much tied to this life as well. Listen and understand the words of Allah:

Whoever works righteousness, whether male or female, while he (or she) is a true believer verily to him We will give a good life (in this world with respect, contentment and lawful provision), and We shall pay them certainly a reward in proportion to the best of what they used to do (i.e. Paradise in the Hereafter). - Surah AnNahl (16/97)

Dear Sister, you have to understand that you or anyone may enter Hellfire! By Allah, we are not better than Fatimah, the daughter of Rasul Allah - sal Allahu alayhi wa sallam. And he said to her, "O Fatimah the daughter of Muhammad, Ask me whatever you wish from my wealth, for I shall avail you nothing to Allah." Meaning that it doesn't matter if you're my daughter, if you don't work for Jannah, saying to Allah that my father is so and so will not help you in anyway.

Islam is filled with many Mu'minahs that completed their Taqwa of Allah. When the other girls put up posters of kafir singers and kafir athletes and kafir actresses, you should put up posters in your heart of Fatimah and many other Mu'minahs.

Aasiyah, the wife of Fir'own. Her Eeman in Allah thrived under the shadow of someone that said, "I am your Lord, Most High!" When news reached Fir'own of his wife's Eeman he beat her and commanded his guards to beat her. They took her out in the scalding noon heat, tied her hands and feet and beat her perpetually. Who did she turn to? She turned to Allah! She prayed, "My lord, build for me a home with you in Paradise and save me from Fir'own and his deeds and save me from the transgressive people."

It was narrated that when she said this, the sky opened for her and she saw her home in Paradise. She smiled. The guards watched astonished - she's being tortured and she smiles? Frustrated, Fir'own commanded a boulder to be brought and dropped on Aasiyah, to crush her to death. But Allah took her soul before the boulder was brought and she became an example for all the believing men and women till the end of time:

[And Allah has set forth an example for those who believe: the wife of Fir'own (Pharaoh) - when she said, "My Lord, Build for me a home with You in Paradise, and save me from Fir'own and his deeds, and save me from the transgressive-disbelieving people.] -Tahreem 66/11

When we talk about Jihad and Shuhadaa' - martyrs - do you know who the first Muslim in Islam to be killed in the path of Allah was? It was Summayah, the mother of Ammar. When Abu Jahl heard of her Islam and her husband Yaasir and her son Ammar, he whipped them all and beat them. So much so, that Rasul Allah would pass by them as they went through this test of their Iman and would say to them, "Be patient O family of Yaasir, for you have a date set (when you shall enter) Jannah!"

As Abu Jahl beat Sumayyah one day, she refused to recant her Deen, something that enraged Abu Jahl. He took a spear as she lay on the burning sand,looking up to the sky, and he speared her through her midsection. She was the first of her family and the entire Ummah to meet Allah as a Martyr.

Dear Sister, our role models come from the Quran. You may have heard the story of the boy and the king. When the entire village became Muslim by the death of that young boy, the king ordered that an enormous fire be kindled and that all those who would not recant their religion be burnt alive. A Mu'minah, stood with her baby over the fire. She looked at her baby, and seeking her child's weakness and innocence, she considered turning her back. The baby said to her, "What are you waiting for mother. Go forward for you are on the truth!" She nodded. Then with her baby in hand she was pushed to her death.

[And they ill-treated them for no other reason than that they believed in Allah, Exalted in Power, Worthy of all Praise!- * Him to Whom belongs the dominion of the heavens and the earth! And Allah is Witness to all things.]. - Surah AlBuruj, 8,9

And dear sister, your role models come to you from today. As her son tells us, a senior women in a Muslim land decided that all the vanity that normally happens in the gatherings of women was not for her. She turned to Salah and praying at night, and in her old age, she found herself calling to her son one night from her prayer room. He son says, "I came in and she was in Sajda saying that she was paralysed!" Her son took her to the doctors and she began a cycle of rehabilitation, but there was little hope. She then commanded her son to take her back home, take her back to her prayer room, take her back to that Sajdah.

As she prayed to Allah in her sajdah, the night came when she called to her son. "Astawdi'ukallaah alladhee laa yadee'u wa daa'i'uh - I leave you in the trust of Allah, and whenever something is left in Allah's trust it is never lost." She passed away in her sajdah. Her muscles froze in that position and so they had to wash her body as she was in Sajdah. The prayed Janazah for her as her body was in sajdah. The carried her to the grave yard as her body was in Sajdah. They buried her as she was in Sajdah.

And the Prophet said that we shall all be resurrected on what we died on, she shall be resurrected on the day of judgement in Sajdah to Allah - Jalla Jalaaluhu wa taqaddasat asmaa'uhu - because that it how she lived and died.

***Part II***

There are many other stories that we know about of powerful believing mothers, wives and sisters and many, many that Allah only knows about. Whenever a halaqah is going on, the Muslim women outnumber the men. At the American Open University, (www.open-university.edu) the overwhelming majority of students are Muslim women. Go to an Islamic teachers/schools conference, attend a lecture and you shall see the mismatch of sisters to brothers. Sometimes it is sad to see all these brothers lacking the motivation that many Muslimahs have. But if there is a beautiful sign in all this, it is that - in sha' Allah ta'ala - those sisters are going to raise an army of believing men and women in the coming generation. WAllahu akbar!

When Imam Ahmad was still young, his father died. He would tell his students of the work his mother went through in raising him, and he would pray for her. In the cold Baghdad nights, she would wake long before him to warm the water so that her son Ahmad could make wudu for Fajr. Then she would wrap him in blankets, herself cloaked in her Jilbaab, and guide him through the dark, cold alleys to reach the main Masjid, long before Fajr so that her son could get a good seat in class. Her son Ahmad - at that age in grade 2 or 3 - would sit all day long studying Quran and Sunnah, and she would wait for him to finish so that she could drop him home safely. At the age of 16, she prepared money and food for him and told him, "Travel for your search of knowledge." He left for Makkah and Madinah and many other places and met many great scholars. She raised Ahmad to become one of the four greatest Imams in Islam.

Dear sister, after all this, ask a non-Muslim what it is that he wants from you? Does he want you to be liberated? Liberated from what? From Allah and his Messenger? From the Quran and the Sunnah? From Jannah? From this deen that Allah chose for you?

And what is he going to give you in return? Happinness? By Allah, he does not own any happiness to give. Is he going to give you love and protection from punishment in the grave and from the gatekeepers of hellfire and from death? Why is it that they want to liberate young beautiful women? Why don't they liberate the seniors? Why don't they liberate the indigenous? Why don't they liberate the inmates? Why is their target audience a young and skinny and tall women (their definition of beauty) between the age of 13 - 28? And why is their first call for you to take off your Hijab?

Remember that friend - if you consider him so - carefully, for - without any doubt, by Allah - he shall be your bitterest enemy on the day of Repayment:

[Friends on that day will be foes, one to another - except the Righteous] - Surah Zukhruf (43/67)

One Kafirah summed up exactly what they think of women, "It's not who you are, it's what you wear and what you look like!"

And listen to Fabian, a french `model' (of what?), as she spit on the fashion industry. "Fashion houses made me into a mannequin, a wooden idol. The mission: to manipulate hearts and alter minds. I learnt how to be worthless, nothing on the inside, cold. We lived in a world of filth in all that filth means."

When the Prophet - sal Allahu alayhi wa sallam - stood on the plain of Arafah and gave his farewell speech he said to the Ummah, "Treat the women kindly!" History records that in Europe in the same year, at the same time that Islam was saying this, the Christian clergy were arguing whether a women was a human or an animal! Those clergymen are the ancestors of the Kuffar that now want to `liberate' you.

There is much more than can be said. I shall conclude with the advice of Rasul Allah - sal Allahu alayhi wa sallam - to every Muslim mother, daughter, and wife: "If the women prays her five (Salah), fasts her month (of Ramadan), protects herself (from committing Zina), and listens to her husband, it will be said to her, `from any door you wish, enter Paradise!"

Sister, that is where you want to be.

[O ye who believe! give your response to Allah and His Messenger, when He calls you to that which shall give you life; and know that Allah cometh between a man and his heart, and that it is He to Whom ye shall (all) be gathered.] - Surah Anfal 8/24

Allah and His Messenger are calling you to life. Dear sister, reply!

Evidence that tattooing, plucking the eyebrows and filling the teeth is haraam.

What is the Islamic ruling on women reducing their eyebrows? Please quote the specific ahaadeeth if possible.


Praise be to Allaah.

Firstly:
Allaah has forbidden women to remove any part of the hair of their eyebrows; this action is called al-namas in Arabic, and it is haraam because of the following evidence:

1 – Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):
“They (all those who worship others than Allaah) invoke nothing but female deities besides Him (Allaah), and they invoke nothing but Shaytaan (Satan), a persistent rebel!
Allaah cursed him. And he [Shaytaan (Satan)] said: ‘I will take an appointed portion of your slaves.
Verily, I will mislead them, and surely, I will arouse in them false desires; and certainly, I will order them to slit the ears of cattle, and indeed I will order them to change the nature created by Allaah.’ And whoever takes Shaytaan (Satan) as a Wali (protector or helper) instead of Allaah, has surely, suffered a manifest loss”
[al-Nisa’ 4:117-119]

The relevant point in this verse is that Iblees will tell people to change the creation of Allaah. Some of the mufassireen interpreted it by saying that what is meant here in this verse is tattooing, plucking the eyebrows and filing the teeth, as we shall see below.

Al-Qurtubi said in his commentary on this verse:
A group said what was meant by changing the creation of Allaah was tattooing and other things that are done for the purpose of beautification. This was stated by Ibn Mas’ood and al-Hasan.
Tafseer al-Qurtubi, 5/392

2 – It was narrated that ‘Abd-Allaah said: “Allaah has cursed the women who do tattoos and those who ask for tattoos to be done, those who ask for their eyebrows to be plucked, and the women ask for their teeth to be filed for the purpose of beautification, changing the creation of Allaah.” A woman from the tribe of Bani Asad whose name was Umm Ya’qoob heard of that and she came and said, “I have heard that you have cursed So and so and So and so.” He said, “Why should I not curse those whom the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) cursed and who are mentioned in the Book of Allaah?’ She said, “I have read what is between the two covers [of the Qur’aan], and I did not find anything in it like what you have said.” He said, “If you have read it, have you not read that Allaah says,
‘And whatsoever the Messenger (Muhammad) gives you, take it; and whatsoever he forbids you, abstain (from it)’
[al-Hashr 59:7]?”

She said, “Of course.” He said, “He forbade that.” She said, “I think your wife does it.” He said, “Go and look.” So she went and looked and she did not see what she was looking for. He said, “If she had been like that, she would not be with us.”
Narrated by al-Bukhaari, 4604; Muslim, 2125
Al-Qurtubi said concerning the meaning of tattooing:
Tattooing is done on the hand; it involves piercing the back of the hand with a needle and filling it with kohl or another substance so that it changes colour. [Translator’s note: this refers to the type of tattooing known at that time]
Tafseer al-Qurtubi, 5/392.

Ibn Hajar said concerning the meaning of plucking the eyebrows:
The mutanammisah is the one who asks another to pluck her eyebrows, and the naamisah is the one who does it. Al-nimaas means removing the hair of the face with tweezers. It was said that the word nimaas refers specifically to removing hair from the eyebrows in order to reduce them or make them straight. Abu Dawood said in al-Sunan: al-naamisah is the one who plucks the eyebrows in order to reduce them.
Fath al-Baari, 10/377

It was said concerning the meaning of those who ask for their teeth to be filed (al-mutafallijaat)
This refers to one who asks for her teeth to be filed or who does that. Falj means making a gap between two teeth and tafalluj means making a gap between two attached things by means of filing or the like. This was usually done to the incisor and the eyetooth for the purpose of beautification. A woman might do this if her teeth were close together so that she would have gaps between her teeth, or an old woman might have do to make it look as if she were younger, because young women usually have gaps between their teeth that disappear as the woman gets older.
Fath al-Baari, 10/372

Al-Qurtubi said:
With regard to all of these matters, the ahaadeeth indicate that those who do them are cursed and that they are major sins. But there is some difference of scholarly opinion concerning the reason why they are forbidden. It was said that it is because it is a kind of deception, or because it is changing the creation of Allaah, as Ibn Mas’ood said. This is more correct, and it also includes the first meaning. And it was said that what is prohibited is what is permanent, because it is changing the creation of Allaah; with regard to what is not permanent, such as kohl and make-up, the scholars have permitted that.

Tafseer al-Qurtubi, 5/393.
See also question no. 13744.

Islam Q&A

Some misconceptions about women in Islam (Part 2)

Divorce

Islam considers marriage a basis for the Islamic family, since it develops bonds of love and caring and a secure atmosphere for the growth and progress of the human race. This, in turn, produces a sound society. This is why the Prophet taught us in a narration, that although classified ‘weak’, has a valid and important meaning. He said: "The most detestable of all lawful things in the sight of Allaah is divorce."However, this does not mean that divorce is prohibited. On the contrary, it can sometimes be the best alternative. Divorce is a right for both women and men if their problems cannot be solved. Two French legislators, Planoil and Ripert, have said: "Divorce is a mischief. However, it is a measure that cannot be avoided for the welfare of the community, because it is the only remedy for another harm which may be more dangerous, i.e. murder."


The above statement applies to cases where the husband and wife have lost their love for each other and where harmony in the marriage is over. Indeed, any other alternative will make them unhappy and will affect their children in the long run.

In these cases, Islam advises the couple to try to reconcile their differences in the presence of some immediate relatives belonging to both sides. If they are unable to do so, they are instructed to seek counseling through a third party, such as friends or other relatives. If there is still no solution, then they should seek a solution through a judge.


The judge will advise the couple to be patient and think of the children. However, if the problem remains unsolved, the family life becomes unbearable and the children are affected, then divorce becomes the only alternative, to enable them to have other spouses.


When it is inescapable, divorce is neither harmful to men nor to women. It is also definitely not unjust to women.
First, the couple must seek divorce in an amicable way. They are instructed to separate without hard feelings towards each other. They should keep a minimum of understanding that will secure the children's situation after the divorce.


The Quran says (what means): "Divorce is twice. Then [after that], either keep [her] in an acceptable manner or release [her] with good treatment. And it is not lawful for you to take anything of what you have given them unless both fear that they will not be able to keep [within] the limits of Allaah, and then there is no blame upon either of them concerning that by which she ransoms herself. These are the limits of Allaah, so do not transgress them. And whoever transgresses the limits of Allaah -- it is those who are the wrongdoers [i.e. the unjust]." [Quran 2: 229]

In Islam, the woman is not neglected after the divorce. Indeed husbands are instructed to provide housing to the divorced wife until her waiting period is completed, as in the saying of Allaah (which means): "Lodge them (During their waiting period (referring to wives whose divorce has been pronounced) [in a section] of where you dwell out of your means and do not harm them in order to oppress them (so that they would be forced to leave or to ransom themselves). And if they should be pregnant, then spend on them until they give birth. And if they breastfeed for you, then give them their payment and confer among yourselves in the acceptable way; but if you are in discord, then there may breastfeed for him [i.e. the father] another woman." [Quran: 65:6]

Finally, although it is true that only men are allowed to pronounce divorce, yet a woman has the right to ask for a divorce, which is called ‘Khul’. In this case, she has to return the dowry given by the husband, so that he utters the divorce.

Attestations

In Islam, one male witness equals two females: The Quran says (what means): "And get two witnesses out of your men. If there are not two men, then a man and two women such as you choose [maybe in place of two men as the witnesses]; so that if one of the women errs, the other one will remind her..." [Quran 2:282]

Here again, many people tend to denounce Islamic principles as unjust to women. They tend to interpret this requirement as proof of men's superiority over women. Again, this assumption is not true. In fact, various psychological and biological studies conducted on the psyche and hormonal functions of women, have proved that men generally tend to react more rationally and less emotionally, than women.

In cases of crime, for example, torn bodies and pouring blood are more likely to spur an emotional reaction among women than among men. This reaction is alone capable of distorting the female's perception and/or memory.

On the other hand, men are also bound by rules concerning their testimony. For instance, they must not be parents, friends or enemies of the accused. Can we then conclude that, if it was the case for women, that male parents and friends of the accused must be considered inferior too? Of course, they are not.

Finally, one should note that there are matters where a woman is the only witness required. These are related to areas where women are the experts, for example, in issues of breast feeding, bringing up children and the question of kinship (who is her child's father).


The Veil

How many times have you seen an educated veiled woman, working and acting normally on television ? Very, very rarely. On the other hand, how many times have you seen a veiled woman being hit by her husband, in tears or fighting and rioting along with fundamentalists?


Just think: What does a black 'Hijaab' veil evoke in your mind? Certainly not the image it is meant to evoke -- religious commitment and peaceful, deep-rooted faith. How many times have you seen a veiled young girl and said: "Haraam! Poor thing! She has not seen the world yet..." Is all this just a coincidence?

Veiled women today are either associated with alienation or fundamentalism. They are either looked upon with pity or fear. Have people ever asked the question: Where is the woman's will to surrender to God in this? Where is her choice of protecting her dearest possession, her body?

When Islam ordered women to wear the veil, it did it to privilege her, not constrain her:

The Quran says (what means): "O Prophet! Tell your wives and your daughters and the women of the believers to draw upon them their over-garments. That is more appropriate so that they may be recognized and not molested." [Quran 33: 59]


The above verses show that Islam aims to protect women from being considered sexual objects. It instructs women to uncover their faces in front of their husband, close relatives whom she cannot marry (Mahaarim) and other women. In front of strangers, she must conceal everything but her face and hands.


Why does one need to show a semi-clad woman in a car's advertisement? Why do we not see a veiled woman? In the first case, because the advertisers are trying to sell the image of the woman with the car. Unconsciously, you buy the car wishing it will provide you with such a "babe." In the second case, the woman has refused to be treated as an object for trade and has worn the veil, a sign of dignity rather than humiliation.



Summarized from: What Does She Expect Better? By: IIPH
(www.islamweb.net)

Some misconceptions about women in Islam. (Part 1)

Islam gave women rights and privileges at a time when only barbaric manners and values dominated.
Yet, some people argue that Islam has alienated women in some domains. In fact, this belief is a misconception. People who say so, may have read about it in a magazine or seen it on TV. A quick examination of the issues judged as unjust to women will certainly correct the misunderstanding.

Man as the head of the household:

Some people believe that a woman in Islam is regarded as inferior to man since the Quran says (what means):
"Men have one degree above women." [Quran 2: 228]

In fact, to understand this Quranic verse, you should see another one, related to the issue in question. It reveals the wisdom behind this concept.


In the Quran it also says (what means): "Men are the protectors and maintainers of women, because Allaah has given the one more than the other and because men support them from their means." [Quran 4:34]

This verse implies that it is a man's duty to support his wife, and not the reverse, but this, in no way, makes him superior to her.

In fact, the rights and responsibilities of a woman are equal to those of a man but they are not necessarily identical. Since men and women are not created identical, they have different physical and emotional qualities, jobs and privileges. This does not mean that women are inferior.

On the contrary, women are considered crucial members of society in Islam since they are assigned the job of bringing up future generations. People today tend to look down at housewives but, in fact, raising children is one of the most important and difficult tasks. The way a mother brings up her child determines the way he will behave in the future. This duty, which requires patience, love, understanding and wisdom was significantly assigned to women in Islam because her nature suits this job.

Allaah The Exalted, in His Wisdom, has assigned a role for each member of the family so that there would be no arguments concerning who should do what. If a sailboat has two leaders, each will want to follow a path, leading ultimately to chaos and even a crash. In the same manner, how many times have your parents fought over some decision because each had their own point of view and wanted to apply it? This is precisely why it is preferable to have one leader for each household. However, this does not give the leader the right to be a dictator, or to neglect the role of his companion. This does not make him superior to other members of his family. It just gives him a larger duty.

Inheritance:

Some people claim that Islam is unjust towards women because it entitles them to inherit half of what men get. In fact, those people only know one side of the truth.

First, the principle of women inheriting half the money is only applicable in 45 percent of the cases. In the other 55 percent, women inherit the same amount or sometimes even more. For example, a mother and a father each inherit the sixth of their son's property when they are not the only inheritors.

In addition, the laws of inheritance in Islam are proportional to the duties of spending. Indeed, a man in Islam has the responsibility of supporting his family, his brother's children (when his brother dies), his parents (when they retire and do not have an income), his children from his previous marriage (if he has them) and his household, including his wife and children. A woman, on the other hand, does not bear this responsibility. She has the freedom to use the money she collects from her dowry or work as she pleases.

You might object here, saying that women today are working and helping their husbands pay the expenses, which entitles them to share equality with men. In fact, you should know that women's economic assistance to their husbands, which has become the norm today, is only an answer to the females’ wishes. Islam does not oblige women to spend on their households. It is a free choice many women have themselves taken today to feel more liberated, so it does not entitle them to a bigger portion of the inheritance.

Polygyny:

Polygyny is one of the most questioned principles that Islam grants men and women. Indeed, many people wrongfully accuse Islam of injustice because it allows a man to have up to four wives. Nevertheless, like every instruction in the Quran, polygyny has a reason. You see, Islam is a practical religion that acknowledges the needs and temptations of human beings and provides laws that deal with them, thus preserving harmony and morality.


Polygyny might be the solution for a couple if the wife is barren, the husband wants children of his own and the option of separation does not appeal to both parties.

If a woman is chronically ill and is unable to perform her marital duties. Polygyny may also be the solution when the couple does not want divorce.

Polygyny is the religion's answer to cases where some men have excessive sexual needs that cannot be fulfilled by one wife. This in no way means that men should abuse this right and use it whenever they fancy a woman. It is rather a chance Islam has provided to prevent men from committing adultery. Many people who condemn polygyny cheat on their wives, calling this phenomenon a 'swift affair.' Islam, at least, has offered the second woman the option of being called 'a wife' rather than 'a mistress', especially in some countries where women remarkably outnumber men.

Polygyny may settle the problem of an increased number of unmarried women, especially during wars.

However, polygyny has some limits and conditions to be met. Indeed, the Quran instructs the man to be fair with his wives on all levels, including treatment, money, house, etc. The only level where the man may have an uneven stance is the level of the feelings that he cannot control:


The Quran says (what means): "You will never be able to do perfect justice between wives even if it is your ardent desire, so do not incline too much to one of them [by giving her more of your time and provision] so as to leave the other hanging [i.e. neither divorced nor married]. And if you do justice, and do all that is right and fear Allaah by keeping away from all that is wrong, then Allaah is Ever-Forgiving and All-Merciful." [Quran 4:129]

Finally, it is worth knowing that Islam gives a woman the right to refuse polygyny for her husband by setting it as a condition during the marriage procedures. If this condition is set, then the woman is granted divorce if her husband marries another while he is still married to her.

You might ask, why could not there be polyandry (a woman having more than one husband)? The answer is simple. Islam did not allow it because Allaah is All-Aware that it will create a problem of kinship. This means that the child may not know who is actually his father (it could be anyone of the four husbands). In addition to the psychological damage it may cause, this problem also complicates the issue of inheritance. Even birds and animals do not allow polyandry.

(to be contd)

A study advising American women to follow the example of the Muslim women.

A study that was conducted by Harvard University (USA) advised women in the United States to follow the example of Muslim women in terms of their morals and chastity so as to eliminate moral disintegration and the serious diseases that are plaguing the United States and western societies.


Harvard University (one of the oldest and most prestigious universities in the US) conducted this study for an association specialized in the diseases that are caused by immorality. This was a comparative study of the rate of sexually transmitted diseases among Muslim women and western women. According to this study, AIDS represents nothing more than a possession that haunts Muslim societies when one of the family members travels abroad. Nevertheless, if such a person adheres to the teachings of Islam, he will return home safely, without being infected by this disease.

Within the Muslim community itself, people live in ultimate peace and do not fear these diseases as society enjoys internal social stability and total abstention from immorality. Moreover, Muslim women adhere to the teachings and morals of their religion; hence, there is no possible way for having a sexual relationship outside marriage.

The study added that the rate of sexually transmitted diseases like AIDS in Islamic societies does not exceed 0.5 per thousand people and that these societies are absolutely immune to these diseases because of the religious and moral commitment of Muslim women. The same thing applies to all other sexually transmitted diseases that only invade the societies that do not abide by moral limits.

The US study showed that the researches related to the rate of sexually transmitted diseases in Muslim communities in the West proved that Muslim families that abide by the teachings of Islam do not suffer from any of these diseases. Moreover, these families enjoy a state of social stability that enables them to achieve financial and social progress. On the other hand, the study revealed that Muslim families in these communities which do not abide by these morals suffer from many of the problems from which Western society suffers.

The study stated that the chastity of the Muslim woman and her adherence to Hijaab are considered among the most important reasons for the social stability enjoyed by Muslim societies. It also called on all American women to try to imitate Muslim women in their attitudes and the way they maintain their chastity, considering this the only way to save American society from collapse because of the moral disintegration and the diseases that are caused by illicit relationships.

It is important to mention that this is not the first study that was conducted by Harvard University, which acknowledges that Islam has introduced concepts and principles for the benefit of humanity. Recently, the Faculty of Medicine at the same university carried out a research that confirmed that leprosy does not infect a Muslim person who performs his prayers at their proper time. The study explained that lukewarm water is the only remedy for this disease; therefore, leprosy never infects the Muslim who preserves his prayers and performs ablution five times a day.

Harvard University was not the only university to acknowledge the greatness of Islam and its rituals. The National Institute for Health Care Researches in Maryland conducted a special study about Islam and its rituals. This study proved that a Muslim who preserves the Islamic rituals is psychologically and physically healthy, leads his life with superb psychological purity and suffers no psychological crises. On the contrary, a non-Muslim or a Muslim who does not observe the Islamic rituals does not have any of these benefits.

Additionally, some scientists in the state of Maryland examined 126 thousand people including religious and irreligious Muslims as well as non-Muslims.

The study revealed that the religious Muslims enjoy a truly sound social life. Moreover, the scientific medical examination proved that the immunity of a religious Muslim person is stronger than that of other people by 10-15%. In addition, it was proved that a Muslim who performs his religious duties is less vulnerable to sudden heart attack.


(www.islamweb.net)

Women's rights in islam.

Praise be to Allaah.

Islam honours women greatly. It honours women as mothers who must be respected, obeyed and treated with kindness. Pleasing one's mother is regarded as part of pleasing Allaah. Islam tells us that Paradise lies at the mother’s feet, i.e. that the best way to reach Paradise is through one's mother. And Islam forbids disobeying one’s mother or making her angry, even by saying a mild word of disrespect. The mother’s rights are greater than those of the father, and the duty to take care of her grows greater as the mother grows older and weaker. All of that is mentioned in many texts of the Qur'aan and Sunnah.

For example, Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):

“And We have enjoined on man to be dutiful and kind to his parents”

[al-Ahqaaf 46:15]

“And your Lord has decreed that you worship none but Him. And that you be dutiful to your parents. If one of them or both of them attain old age in your life, say not to them a word of disrespect, nor shout at them but address them in terms of honour.

24. And lower unto them the wing of submission and humility through mercy, and say: ‘My Lord! Bestow on them Your Mercy as they did bring me up when I was young’”

[al-Isra’ 17:23, 24]

Ibn Maajah (2781) narrated that Mu’aawiyah ibn Jaahimiah al-Sulami (may Allaah be pleased with him) said: I came to the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) and said: O Messenger of Allaah, I want to go for jihad with you, seeking thereby the Face of Allaah and the Hereafter. He said, “Woe to you! Is your mother still alive?” I said, Yes. He said, “Go back and honour her.” Then I approached him from the other side and said: O Messenger of Allaah, I want to go for jihad with you, seeking thereby the Face of Allaah and the Hereafter. He said, “Woe to you! Is your mother still alive?” I said, Yes. He said, “Go back and honour her.” Then I approached him from in front and said, O Messenger of Allaah, I want to go for jihad with you, seeking thereby the Face of Allaah and the Hereafter. He said, “Woe to you! Is your mother still alive?” I said, Yes. He said, “Go back and honour her (lit. stay by her feet), for there is Paradise.”

Classed as saheeh by al-Albaani in Saheeh Sunan Ibn Maajah. It was also narrated by al-Nasaa’i with the words: “Stay with her for Paradise is beneath her feet.”

Al-Bukhaari (5971) and Muslim (2548) narrated that Abu Hurayrah (may Allaah be pleased with him) said: A man came to the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) and said: “O Messenger of Allaah, who is most deserving of my good company?” He said: “Your mother.” He said: “Then who?” He said: “Your mother.” He said: “Then who?” He said: “Your mother.” He said: “Then who?” He said: “Then your father.”

And there are other texts which we do not have room to mention here.

One of the rights which Islam gives to the mother is that her son should spend on her if she needs that support, so long as he is able and can afford it. Hence for many centuries it was unheard of among the people of Islam for a mother to be left in an old-people’s home or for a son to kick her out of the house, or for her sons to refuse to spend on her, or for her to need to work in order to eat and drink if her sons were present.

Islam also honours women as wives. Islam urges the husband to treat his wife in a good and kind manner, and says that the wife has rights over the husband like his rights over her, except that he has a degree over her, because of his responsibility of spending and taking care of the family’s affairs. Islam states that the best of the Muslim men is the one who treats his wife in the best manner, and the man is forbidden to take his wife’s money without her consent. Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):

“and live with them honourably”

[al-Nisa’ 4:19]

“And they (women) have rights (over their husbands as regards living expenses) similar (to those of their husbands) over them (as regards obedience and respect) to what is reasonable, but men have a degree (of responsibility) over them. And Allaah is All-Mighty, All-Wise”

[al-Baqarah 2:228]

And the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “I urge you to treat women well.” Narrated by al-Bukhaari, 331; Muslim, 1468.

And the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “The best of you is the one who is best to his wife, and I am the best of you to my wives.” Narrated by al-Tirmidhi, 3895; Ibn Maajah, 1977; classed as saheeh by al-Albaani in Saheeh al-Tirmidhi.

And Islam honours women as daughters, and encourages us to raise them well and educate them. Islam states that raising daughters will bring a great reward. For example, the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “Whoever takes care of two girls until they reach adulthood, he and I will come like this on the Day of Resurrection,” and he held his fingers together. Narrated by Muslim, 2631.

Ibn Maajah (3669) narrated that ‘Uqbah ibn ‘Aamir (may Allaah be pleased with him) said: I heard the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) say: “Whoever has three daughters and is patient towards them, and feeds them, gives them to drink and clothes them from his riches, they will be a shield for him from the Fire on the Day of Resurrection.” Classed as saheeh by al-Albaani in Saheeh Ibn Maajah.

Islam honours woman as sisters and as aunts. Islam enjoins upholding the ties of kinship and forbids severing those ties in many texts. The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “O people! Spread (the greeting of) salaam, offer food (to the needy), uphold the ties of kinship, and pray at night when people are sleeping, and you will enter Paradise in peace.” Narrated by Ibn Maajah, 3251; classed as saheeh by al-Albaani in Saheeh Ibn Maajah.

Al-Bukhaari (5988) narrated that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “Allaah, may He be exalted, said to the ties of kinship: ‘Whoever upholds you, I will support him, and whoever breaks you, I will cut him off.’”

All of these qualities may co-exist in a single woman: she may be a wife, a daughter, a mother, a sister, an aunt, so she may be honoured in all these ways.

To conclude: Islam raised the status of women, and made them equal with men in most rulings. So women, like men, are commanded to believe in Allaah and to worship Him. And women are made equal to men in terms of reward in the Hereafter. Women have the right to express themselves, to give sincere advice, to enjoin what is good and forbid what is evil, and to call people to Allaah. Women have the right to own property, to buy and sell, to inherit, to give charity and to give gifts. It is not permissible for anyone to take a woman’s wealth without her consent. Women have the right to a decent life, without facing aggression or being wronged. Women have the right to be educated; in fact it is obligatory to teach them what they need to know about their religion.

Anyone who compares the rights of women in Islam with their situation during the Jaahiliyyah or in other civilizations will understand that what we are saying is true. In fact we are certain that women are given the greatest honour in Islam.

There is no need for us to mention the situation of women in Greek, Persian or Jewish society, but even Christian societies had a bad attitude towards women. The theologians even gathered at the Council of Macon to discuss whether woman was merely a body or a body with a soul. They thought it most likely that women did not have a soul that could be saved, and they made an exception only in the case of Mary (Maryam – peace be upon her).

The French held a conference in 586 CE to discuss whether women had souls or not, and if they had souls, were these souls animal or human? In the end, they decided that they were human! But they were created to serve men only.

During the time of Henry VIII, the English Parliament issued a decree forbidding women to read the New Testament because they were regarded as impure.

Until 1805, English law allowed a man to sell his wife, and set a wife’s price at six pennies.

In the modern age, women were kicked out of the house at the age of eighteen so that they could start working to earn a bite to eat. If a woman wanted to stay in the house, she had to pay her parents rent for her room and pay for her food and laundry.

See ‘Awdat al-Hijaab, 2/47-56.

How can this compare to Islam which enjoins honouring and kind treatment of women, and spending on them?

Secondly:

With regard to the changes in these rights throughout the ages, the basic principles have not changed, but with regard to the application of these principles, there can be no doubt that during the golden age of Islam, the Muslims applied the sharee’ah of their Lord more, and the rulings of this sharee’ah include honouring one’s mother and treating one’s wife, daughter, sister and women in general in a kind manner. The weaker religious commitment grew, the more these rights were neglected, but until the Day of Resurrection there will continue to be a group who adheres to their religion and applies the sharee’ah of their Lord. These are the people who honour women the most and grant them their rights.

Despite the weakness of religious commitment among many Muslims nowadays, women still enjoy a high status, whether as daughters, wives or sisters, whilst we acknowledge that there are shortcomings, wrongdoing and neglect of women’s rights among some people, but each one will be answerable for himself.



Islam Q&A

Why I Shed Bikini for Niqab: The New Symbol of Women's Liberation

I am an American woman who was born in the midst of America's "Heartland." I grew up, just like any other girl, being fixated with the glamour of life in "the big city." Eventually, I moved to Florida and on to South Beach of Miami, a hotspot for those seeking the "glamorous life." Naturally, I did what most average Western girls do. I focused on my appearance and appeal, basing my self-worth on how much attention I got from others. I worked out religiously and became a personal trainer, acquired an upscale waterfront residence, became a regular "exhibiting" beach-goer and was able to attain a "living-in-style" kind of life.

Years went by, only to realize that my scale of self-fulfillment and happiness slid down the more I progressed in my "feminine appeal." I was a slave to fashion. I was a hostage to my looks.

As the gap continued to progressively widen between my self-fulfillment and lifestyle, I sought refuge in escapes from alcohol and parties to meditation, activism, and alternative religions, only to have the little gap widen to what seemed like a valley. I eventually realized it all was merely a pain killer rather than an effective remedy.

By now it was September 11, 2001. As I witnessed the ensuing barrage on Islam, Islamic values and culture, and the infamous declaration of the "new crusade," I started to notice something called Islam. Up until that point, all I had associated with Islam was women covered in "tents," wife beaters, harems, and a world of terrorism.

As a feminist libertarian, and an activist who was pursuing a better world for all, my path crossed with that of another activist who was already at the lead of indiscriminately furthering causes of reform and justice for all. I joined in the ongoing campaigns of my new mentor which included, at the time, election reform and civil rights, among others. Now my new activism was fundamentally different. Instead of "selectively" advocating justice only to some, I learned that ideals such as justice, freedom, and respect are meant to be and are essentially universal, and that own good and common good are not in conflict. For the first time, I knew what "all people are created equal" really means. But most importantly, I learned that it only takes faith to see the world as one and to see the unity in creation.

One day I came across a book that is negatively stereotyped in the West--The Holy Qur'an. I was first attracted by the style and approach of the Qur'an, and then intrigued by its outlook on existence, life, creation, and the relationship between Creator and creation. I found the Qur'an to be a very insightful address to heart and soul without the need for an interpreter or pastor.

Eventually I hit a moment of truth: my new-found self-fulfilling activism was nothing more than merely embracing a faith called Islam where I could live in peace as a "functional" Muslim.

I bought a beautiful long gown and head cover resembling the Muslim woman's dress code and I walked down the same streets and neighborhoods where only days earlier I had walked in my shorts, bikini, or "elegant" western business attire. Although the people, the faces, and the shops were all the same, one thing was remarkably distinct--I was not--nor was the peace at being a woman I experienced for the very first time. I felt as if the chains had been broken and I was finally free. I was delighted with the new looks of wonder on people's faces in place of the looks of a hunter watching his prey I had once sought. Suddenly a weight had been lifted off my shoulders. I no longer spent all my time consumed with shopping, makeup, getting my hair done, and working out. Finally, I was free.

Of all places, I found my Islam at the heart of what some call "the most scandalous place on earth," which makes it all the more dear and special.

While content with Hijab I became curious about Niqab, seeing an increasing number of Muslim women in it. I asked my Muslim husband, whom I married after I reverted to Islam, whether I should wear Niqab or just settle for the Hijab I was already wearing. My husband simply advised me that he believes Hijab is mandatory in Islam while Niqab is not. At the time, my Hijab consisted of head scarf that covered all my hair except for my face, and a loose long black gown called "Abaya" that covered all my body from neck to toe.

A year-and-a-half passed, and I told my husband I wanted to wear Niqab. My reason, this time, was that I felt it would be more pleasing to Allah, the Creator, increasing my feeling of peace at being more modest. He supported my decision and took me to buy an "Isdaal," a loose black gown that covers from head to toe, and Niqab, which covers all my head and face except for my eyes.

Soon enough, news started breaking about politicians, Vatican clergymen, libertarians, and so-called human rights and freedom activists condemning Hijab at times, and Niqab at others as being oppressive to women, an obstacle to social integration, and more recently, as an Egyptian official called it--"a sign of backwardness."

I find it to be a blatant hypocrisy when Western governments and so-called human rights groups rush to defend woman's rights when some governments impose a certain dress code on women, yet such "freedom fighters" look the other way when women are being deprived of their rights, work, and education just because they choose to exercise their right to wear Niqab or Hijab. Today, women in Hijab or Niqab are being increasingly barred from work and education not only under totalitarian regimes such as in Tunisia, Morocco, and Egypt, but also in Western democracies such as France, Holland, and Britain.

Today I am still a feminist, but a Muslim feminist, who calls on Muslim women to assume their responsibilities in providing all the support they can for their husbands to be good Muslims. To raise their children as upright Muslims so they may be beacons of light for all humanity once again. To enjoin good--any good--and to forbid evil--any evil. To speak righteousness and to speak up against all ills. To fight for our right to wear Niqab or Hijab and to please our Creator whichever way we chose. But just as importantly to carry our experience with Niqab or Hijab to fellow women who may never have had the chance to understand what wearing Niqab or Hijab means to us and why do we, so dearly, embrace it.

Most of the women I know wearing Niqab are Western reverts, some of whom are not even married. Others wear Niqab without full support of either family or surroundings. What we all have in common is that it is the personal choice of each and every one of us, which none of us is willing to surrender. Willingly or unwillingly, women are bombarded with styles of "dressing-in-little-to-nothing" virtually in every means of communication everywhere in the world. As an ex non-Muslim, I insist on women's right to equally know about Hijab, its virtues, and the peace and happiness it brings to a woman's life as it did to mine. Yesterday, the bikini was the symbol of my liberty, when in actuality it only liberated me from my spirituality and true value as a respectable human being.

I couldn't be happier to shed my bikini in South Beach and the "glamorous" Western lifestyle to live in peace with my Creator and enjoy living among fellow humans as a worthy person. It is why I choose to wear Niqab, and why I will die defending my inalienable right to wear it. Today, Niqab is the new symbol of woman's liberation.

To women who surrender to the ugly stereotype against the Islamic modesty of Hijab, I say: You don't know what you are missing.

(By Sara Bokker.She is a former actress/model/fitness instructor and activist. Currently, Sara is Director of Communications at "The March For Justice," a co-founder of "The Global Sisters Network," and producer of the infamous "Shock & Awe Gallery.")

Why Hijaab?

Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):

“O Prophet! Tell your wives and your daughters and the women of the believers to draw their cloaks (veils) all over their bodies (i.e. screen themselves completely except the eyes or one eye to see the way). That will be better, that they should be known (as free respectable women) so as not to be annoyed. And Allaah is Ever Oft‑Forgiving, Most Merciful”

[al-Ahzaab 33:59]


Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):

“And tell the believing women to lower their gaze (from looking at forbidden things), and protect their private parts (from illegal sexual acts) and not to show off their adornment except only that which is apparent (like both eyes for necessity to see the way, or outer palms of hands or one eye or dress like veil, gloves, headcover, apron), and to draw their veils all over Juyoobihinna (i.e. their bodies, faces, necks and bosoms) and not to reveal their adornment except to their husbands, or their fathers, or their husband’s fathers, or their sons, or their husband’s sons, or their brothers or their brother’s sons, or their sister’s sons, or their (Muslim) women (i.e. their sisters in Islam), or the (female) slaves whom their right hands possess, or old male servants who lack vigour, or small children who have no sense of feminine sex. And let them not stamp their feet so as to reveal what they hide of their adornment. And all of you beg Allaah to forgive you all, O believers, that you may be successful”

[al-Noor 24:31]

Precious White Pearls.

Precious White Pearls.
(Umm Amathullah )

Islam describes women as Precious White Pearls. The Quran asks both men and women to perform in equal measure, the duty of enjoining good and forbidding evil.

Allah SWA says: “And I have never created the jinn and the mankind, except to worship Me” (Surat Al-Dhaariyaat: 56)

Allah SWA says: “The believers, men and women are protectors of one another, they enjoin what is just and forbid what is evil, they observe regular prayers, practice regular charity and obey Allah and His Messenger. On them Allah will pour His Mercy, for Allah is exalted in power, Wise” (Surat At-Taubah 9:71)

A woman will be either a mother or a wife or a daughter. When comparing to men there are much more verses and hadiths (than men) representing kind treatment to women.

In Islam, the value and importance of women in the society and the true measure of their success as human beings, is measured with a completely different criteria: their fear of Allah and obedience to Him, and fulfillment of the duties He has entrusted them with, particularly that of bearing, rearing and teaching children.

The Muslim mother has a great feeling of security about the type of care and consideration she can expect from her children. Thankfulness to parents is linked with thankfulness to Allah, and good conduct begins at home with one’s closest relatives.

Nabi SAW said: “Verily, Allah forbade for you rudeness (disobedience) to mothers” (Narrated by Tirimidhi: 1165)

“A man came to Nabi SAW and said: ‘O Messenger of Allah! Who is more entitled to be treated with the best companionship by me?’ The Prophet SAW replied: ‘Your Mother”, the man then asked: “Then who?”, Nabi SAW replied: ‘Then your mother”, the man then asked: “Then who?”, Nabi SAW replied: ‘Then your mother”, the man then asked: “Then who?”, Nabi SAW replied: ‘Then your Father’.” (Reported by Bukhari & Muslim)

It is clearly mentioned that women were created for men. A wife is also regarded as a source of love, peace and compassion, as stated in the Quran:

Allah SWA says: “And among His signs is this, that He created for you mates from among yourselves, that ye may dwell in tranquility with them and He has put love and mercy between your (hearts): Verily in that are signs for those who reflect” (Surat Al-Rum 30:21)

It is narrated from Nabi SAW that: “The world is full of Pleasures, and most pleasant thing (which a person can get) is a Pious Wife” (Reported by Muslim, Nasaai, Ibn-Maajah, Ahmed and Ibn Hibbaan)

A woman takes precedence in the responsibilities of the husband, family and other house works. Men are ordered to treat them kindly and to look after them kindly by clothing and feeding them according to his standards.

With this regard Allah SWA says: “Men are the protectors and maintainers of women, because Allah has given more (strength) than the other, and because they support them from their means. Therefore the righteous women are devoutly obedient, and guard in (the husband’s) absence what Allah would have them guard…” (Surat An-Nisa 4: 34)

The Prophet SAW said; “The wife is a guardian and is responsible for her husband’s house and offsprings” (Narrated by Bukhari: 5188)

And also Allah SWA says: “… They (wives) are your garments and you (husbands) are their garments…” (Surat Al-Bagharah: 2: 187)

The Prophet Muhammad SAW also emphasized the importance of this compassionate treatment: “I command you to treat women kindly. Women has been created from a rib (the rib is crooked), and the most crooked part of the rib is in the upper region. If you try to make it straight you will break it, and if you leave it as it is, it will remain curved. So treat women kindly” (Reported by Bukhari: 5185)

It is narrated that Nabi SAW said: “The believers with perfect faith are those who have the best disposition and the best of you are those who are best to their wives” (Tirmidhi)

In another Hadith Nabi SAW said: “The best of you are, those who are best to the women” (Sahih Al-Jami’ Al-Sagheer)

Islam highly values girls (daughters) and strictly forbids casting aspersions to them.

In this regard Prophet SAW said: “Do not hate girls. They are comforting and very precious” (Ahmed)

Islam also enjoins upon Muslims to provide good education and training to their daughters and see them well settled in marriage with a fine match and continue a fair and just treatment even after marriage.

Allah SWA says in the Quran: “Allah will raise up to (suitable) ranks (and degrees), those of you believe and who have been granted knowledge” (Surat Al-Mujadhalah 58:11)

And also says: “Are those equal, those who know and those who do not know?” (Surat Az-Zumar: 39:09)

It is narrated from Abu Huraira RA that Rasuluh Allah SAW said: “Whoever follows a way to seek knowledge, Allah will make easy for him a way to Paradise” (Muslim & Trimidi)

It is also narrated that Nabi SAW said: “Acquiring knowledge is compulsory for every Muslim man and women” (At-Tabarani)

The Prophet SAW said: “Whomever nourishes three daughters, educates and trains them, gets them married (and afterwards) offers a gentle behaviour to them, has his place reserved in heaven” (Haakim)

We should remember that a married Muslim women has so many responsibilities in her hand as a wife and mother. This prevents them from completely engaging (spending all her time) in studies, like men or unmarried sisters do.

And also one of the important things which we have to know is that, their studying environment should be an Islamic environment, which means there shouldn't be any unlawful things in the environment which they study or the things which they study, like free mixing and so on. If such conditions are fulfilled then in Islam, nothing prevents them from gaining knowledge.

Also Islam does not prohibit women from working outside the home. But they should meet the conditions of the Islamic Shari’a. Their working environment should be a suitable environment for them. Her job should not be one which forces her to mix and associate with men. She should seek employment in positions which require women’s special skills, or which relate to the needs of women and children, such as teaching, nursing other women, midwifery, medicine with specialisations like pediatrics or obstetrics-gynecology. Her employment should not come before or seriously interfere with her responsibilities which are obligatory upon her as wife and mother.

As a conclusion I say, I am proud to be a dutiful muslim woman and I am satisfied with it with full submission. Verily it is the teachings of Islam that brought tranquility to my heart. Even if the whole world is against it, I will strive my best to stand firm on this path, in sha Allah. My dear sisters, Wake up! Do not wait until it is too late.